CHEMISTRY COMMUNITY

hojae_lee_1C

Q: How often do you joke about elements?
A: Only periodically

hojae_lee_1C

I lost an electron
You should really keep an ion them

hojae_lee_1C

Q: What do you call an acid with attitude?
A: a-mean-o-acid

hojae_lee_1C

Q: Why does the army use acid?
A: To neutralize the enemy base.

hojae_lee_1C

Q: Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?
A: Because it's in the ground state.

hojae_lee_1C

The best thing about learning equilibrium is that nothing changes.

hojae_lee_1C

Two atoms are walking down the street.
One of them shouts, "Hey! I think I lost an electron!"
The other inquires, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm positive!"

hojae_lee_1C

Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you can't helium and you can't curium, then you may as well barium.

hojae_lee_1C

Q: Why do chemistry students do well when working with ammonia?
A: Because it's pretty basic stuff.

hojae_lee_1C

Q: What do you call Iron blowing in the wind?
A: Fe-breeze

hojae_lee_1C

Q: Why did Carbon marry Hydrogen?
A: They bonded well from the minute they met

hojae_lee_1C

Q: Why did the noble gas cry?
A: Because all his friends Argon

hojae_lee_1C

A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."

hojae_lee_1C

The optimist sees the glass half full. The pessimist sees the glass half empty. The chemist sees the glass completely full, half with liquid and half with air.

hojae_lee_1C

Q: Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
A: It went OK.

hojae_lee_1C

What substance has the formula HIJKLMNO?

WATER

hojae_lee_1C

why do chemists like nitrates so much?

because its cheaper than day rates

hojae_lee_1C

What is a cation afraid of?

A dogion

hojae_lee_1C

I Heard Oxygen And Magnesium Were Going Out

And I was like OMg

hojae_lee_1C

Why did the white bear dissolve in water?

Because it was polar

hojae_lee_1C

what kind of dogs do chemists get?

a LABrador retriever

hojae_lee_1C

A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."

hojae_lee_1C

The optimist sees the glass half full. The pessimist sees the glass half empty. The chemist sees the glass completely full, half with liquid and half with air.

hojae_lee_1C

Two chemists go into a bar. The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O." The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" and he died.

hojae_lee_1C

Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
Because they're cheaper than day rates.

hojae_lee_1C

I'm reading a chemistry book about helium.
I can't put it down.

hojae_lee_1C

You'd think that atoms bonding with other atoms would mean they're being friendly, but really they steal each other's electrons.
How ionic...

hojae_lee_1C

Q: What do you call a scientific plant?
A: Chemis-tree.

hojae_lee_1C

If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate!

hojae_lee_1C

Q: What is the most important rule in chemistry?
A: Never lick the spoon!

hojae_lee_1C

What is a cation afraid of?
a dogion

hojae_lee_1C

I make bad jokes... but only periodically

hojae_lee_1C

IS dissociated the same as saying that it deprotonated? The course reader uses dissociated and the book uses deprotonated. Do these both mean that the acid or base are fully broken apart as products?

hojae_lee_1C

The value of Kw for water at body temperature (37°C) is 2.1 X 10^-14. (a)What is the molarity of H3O+ ions and the pH of neutral water at 37°C? (b) What is the molarity of OH- in neutral water at 37"C?

How would I approach part (a) and (b)?

hojae_lee_1C

Let's take all the bad jokes and "Barium"!

hojae_lee_1C

The name is Bond.... Ionic Bond...
Taken, not shared

hojae_lee_1C

Oxygen and Potassium went on a date...
It was OK

hojae_lee_1C

Q: want to hear a joke about sodium
A: Na

hojae_lee_1C

Q: What did one ion say to the other?
A: I've got my ion you.

hojae_lee_1C

The optimist sees the glass half full.
The pessimist sees the glass half empty.
The chemist see the glass completely full, half in the liquid state and half in the vapor state.

hojae_lee_1C

Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."
Helium doesn't react.

hojae_lee_1C

Q: What is the chemical formula for "banana"?
A: BaNa2

hojae_lee_1C

According to the periodic trend, Nitrogen should have a higher electron affinity than Carbon. But once you check the electron affinities of each atom, Carbon's electron affinity is higher than that of Nitrogen. Does this have to do with the unpaired valence electrons in Carbon and the one paired val...

hojae_lee_1C

Q: Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
A: It went OK.

hojae_lee_1C

Q: What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?
A: CoFe2

hojae_lee_1C

Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
He just couldn't put it down.

hojae_lee_1C

Why does the electron configuration for Copper and Chromium seem to not obey the rules (i.e. why isn't the electron configuration for Copper isn't [Ar] 4s^2 3d^9 and Chromium isn't [Ar] 4s^2 3d^4? ) Thanks!

hojae_lee_1C

I understand the equation part of the Bohr Frequency Condition, but what does this exactly establish conceptually? How does this help with atomic spectroscopy?

hojae_lee_1C

Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?

hojae_lee_1C

I am having a tough time calculating the energy required to remove an electron from a sodium atom. The given information includes the ejected electron's velocity v = 6.61 x 10^5 m/s and sodium's work function = 150.6 kJ/mol. How do I approach this question?

hojae_lee_1C

first convert the moles into atoms, since the question gives you the radius of the atom. So use the Avogadro's number to convert 1 mole to 6.22 x 10^23 and from there multiply it by the diameter of the atom to determine the length of the fiber

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