CHEMISTRY COMMUNITY

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Why does formic acid neutralize all other acids? Because it’s an ant-acid! [Formic acid is the venom in red ant stings.]

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Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They’re cheaper than day rates.

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It takes alkynes to make a world. (ACS Bumper Sticker)

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Isaac Asimov said that if you want to find a chemist, ask him/her to discuss the following words: mole, unionized. As he so eloquently put it, “If he starts talking about furry animals and organized labor, keep walking.”

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If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the precipitate.

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Why do chemistry professors like to teach about ammonia? Because it is its basic material.

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Did you hear about the chemist who was reading a book about Helium? He just couldn’t put it down.

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I dare you to lower your body temperature to absolute zero.

I promise you’ll be 0K.

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Why did the bear dissolve in water?

It was a polar bear.

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What did the thermometer say to the measuring cylinder?

“You may be graduated, but I have several degrees.”

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best one by far

Why did the attacking army use acid?

To neutralize the enemy’s base.

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What’s the difference between chemistry jokes and physics jokes?

Chemistry jokes can be funny periodically, but physics jokes have more potential.

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Someone threw sodium chloride at me.

I yelled, “That’s a salt!”

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Why do chemists find working with ammonia easy?

Because it’s pretty basic stuff.

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If H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide, what is H2O4?

Drinking, bathing, and lots of other daily activities.

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Did you hear about oxygen’s date with potassium?

It went OK

(this one was bad even by my standards

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Want to hear a joke about sodium, bromine, and oxygen?

Na BrO.

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Did you hear the one about cobalt, radon, and yttrium?

It was CoRnY

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I tried writing jokes about the periodic table…

…but I realized I wasn’t quite in my element.

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What should you do if no one laughs at your chemistry jokes?

Keep telling them until you get a reaction.

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He He He. (Helium Helium Helium)

Two chemists walk into a bar.

One says, “I’ll have an ‎H2O.” The other says, “I’ll have an ‎H2O, too.” The second chemist dies.

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But you would most likely write Ag+ (aq) in any other circumstance

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I asked my TA this and he summed it up as " specific to this answer"

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They will always be

E (Cathode) > E (Anode)

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HW HW HW HW HW HW!!!

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All topics from the quarter are fair game

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If you follow along the columns of the periodic table then you can see the pattern of oxidation numbers. (E.g. row 17 species oxidation # is -1)

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None of these jokes are catalyzing a reaction from

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Sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium... Batman

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If Avogadro calls, tell him to leave his number

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I started using tinder to ignite up my love life bt it had a negative reaction

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Thanks for the help everybody

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Anna Nordstrom 1A wrote:Enjoy the joke!

hehe moles lol

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Hey, I was sick on wednesday and I was wondering if anybody could help me out and send me the noter for that lecture. (Drop your email below)

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Jonathan Shih 3H wrote:If H20 is water, what is H204?
Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.

If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
H2O cubed.

Anyone know any jokes about the element sodium?
Na.

Have been trying to figure out the first joke for almost a year and I can't figure out lmao

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vaishali 1D wrote:Q: What is CH2O?

A: Seawater

saltwater

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vaishali 1D wrote:Q: What animal is made up of calcium, nickel and neon?

A: A CaNiNe

lmao

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We had a fun review session on Friday November 7 and I encourage all students to view it as there were many excellent Q&A. I started my review session by reading out the following chemistry joke given to me by a student: Q. Why should you never trust atoms? A. Because they make up everything! A...

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K is a value for the the rate of the reaction at equilibrium. Q is a meusurement of the the rate of the reaction at any given time. But we know that the reaction will always try to attain equilibrium so the value of Q will be driven towards K. https://d2jmvrsizmvf4x.cloudfront.net/oE3LzbjfRgizQ5CQC2...

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Q is what the value is, while K is what the value should be at equilibrium. The reaction will shift to reduce the difference until Q=K

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Who wants to date, we already have good chemistry... maybe we can find a bond ;)

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In discussion every week for the rest of the quarter

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Why are hydrogen bonds stronger than traditional dipole to dipole interactions?

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Bronsted acids donate protons and Bronsted bases accept protons.
Lewis acids accept lone pairs and Lewis bases donate lone pairs.

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ionic bonds are generally between metals and nonmetals

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I would think that they would be on his own class website

Daisylookinland4B wrote:Does anyone remember what the website was that Dr. Lavelle mentioned in class that has learning modules similar to the ones we had for the first units? I could be wrong but I remember him making a comment about more learning modules.

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Nicholas Le 3A wrote:The test will be on everything after the midterm to now. Essentially, you must understand the last concepts in chemical bonding, intermolecular forces, and both VSEPR and valence bond theory.

Thank you!

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If class is cancelled, do we have discussion that day ?

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Is the average the baseline for a B? or is there another grading scale?

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I've had strep throat the last 2 weeks and haven't been able to attend class since. I would really appreciate if someone could send me the notes from the past two weeks and fill me in on what's happening.

If you're willing to help, just drop your email and I'll contact you.

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The d-orbital should always come before the s-orbital as long as it is in a lower energy level (e.g. 3d before 4s)

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Ionic: gives up electrons, based on electrostatic attraction
Covalent: Shared electrons between atoms

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Have to account for lone electron pair

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From my understanding, it's the least electronegative. I could be wrong though

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No disrespect, but this is wrong. I like breaking down question and relating them to more ordinary questions; so for this specific questions, I relate the electron's quantum number to an address, and the question is asking how many people can live with a given address. For example, who can possibly ...

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There are mnemonics you can use for the IS prefix's to remember the order. i.e. Kings Hate Dragons Because Dragons Can’t Make Money = Kilo, Hecto, Deca, Base, Deci, Centi, Milli, Micro). The problem with this is it doesn't differentiate the magnitudes between (i.e. The difference of orders of magnit...

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We should all sing happy birthday to him when he walks into to class tomorrow!!!!!

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General rule of thumb: Go by the fewest amount of sig figs for any givens!

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My question is more of an abstract/conceptual one

What is the relationship between a atom, it's nucleus, and those electrons NOT in the valence shell?
And how does that affect the orbitals, and/or valence electrons?

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Yeah, I'm slightly confused by this topic as well. From my understanding, I think that it refers to the specific emissions of light that are emitted when a particular atom's valence electron(s) become excited and move from one energy state to another. Am I wrong, and what more is there to know about...

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No, he said up to today's lecture (Friday of Week 3)

Lynsea_Southwick_3F wrote:Will Monday's lecture be on the test?
Rachel Dang 1H wrote:Blackbody radiation should not be on the test next week, the material that we have covered including today's lecture will be though.

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The ground state means that the electrons are in their lowest energy state. For example, this is a Carbon atom's electron configuration. This is the ground state because all the lower energy orbitals (1s and 2s) are occupied by an electron. groundstateatom.png Let's say that an electron absorbs some...

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I don't think we cover the details of the Schrodinger explicitly in this course, unlike Chem 20A. It's mathematically challenging, but here is the things we should basically know about it. 1. It's based on the idea of the wave-particle nature of an electron All objects have a wave to them. But since...

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