CHEMISTRY COMMUNITY

sheilaho_1E

What kind of ghosts haunt chemistry faculties?

Methylated Spirits.

sheilaho_1E

Q: What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?
A: Breaking up is hard to do.

sheilaho_1E

I initially decided to write jokes about the Periodic Table, but never really felt I was in my element.

sheilaho_1E

Why did Carbon marry Hydrogen?
They bonded well from the minute they met

sheilaho_1E

Here is a historical note: In the 1980's, in an effort to increase public awareness about the importance of chemistry, the American Chemical Society posted billboards with a picture of C6H10 and the title, "It takes alkynes to make a world."

sheilaho_1E

A chemistry teacher was berating the students for not learning the periodic table of elements. She said, "When I was your age, I knew both the names and atomic weights." One kid piped up, "Yeah, but teacher, there were so few of them back then."

sheilaho_1E

Q: Why did the noble gas cry?
A: Because all his friends Argon

sheilaho_1E

Do you have any sodium hypobromite?

NaHBrO

sheilaho_1E

Are you sulfur, oxygen, copper, and tellurium?

Because you are SO CuTe.

sheilaho_1E

Oxygen asked Nitrogen out, but nitrogen was all like NO

sheilaho_1E

What is the chemist's favorite part of an EDM song?

When the base drops.

sheilaho_1E

What does the leader of of the electron army say when they go to war?

CHAAARRGGGEEE!

sheilaho_1E

What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!

sheilaho_1E

Q: What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?
A: He was booked for a salt and battery.

sheilaho_1E

Q:What does the chemist snack on during lunch?
A: A "gram" cracker

sheilaho_1E

What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?
Polar Bond.

sheilaho_1E

Organic chemistry is difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.

sheilaho_1E

Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.

sheilaho_1E

Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?

sheilaho_1E

That's a good one lol

Here's another one.

You should never believe atoms. They make up everything!

CHEMISTRY COMMUNITY

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