Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Element 1: Oh no! I just lost an electron!
Element 2: Oh no! Are you positive?
Element 2: Oh no! Are you positive?
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
We'd give you some more chemistry jokes, but all the good ones argon.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Wait, are all these jokes too basic for you? Because I see no reaction.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If H2O is the formula for water, then what is the formula for ice? H2O cubed!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I want to write some jokes about the periodic table… But I don't think I'll be in my element.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I think these jokes are sodium funny. In fact, I slapped my neon that one!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
As the two polar bonds stared into each other's eyes, they soon began to share a moment. A dipole moment.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A small furry mammal walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says, "Sorry, our maximum occupancy is only 6.00 x 10^23. We can't serve a mole.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What do you get when you cut an avocado into 6.02214x1023 pieces? Guacamole!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium? He just couldn't put it down.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.
They're cheaper than day rates.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I hate when people reply to my texts with "K." Who wants to talk about potassium?
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why did Barium, Carbon, Potassium, and Sulfur get along so well?
They had each others BaCKS
They had each others BaCKS
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A photon checks into a hotel, the front desk asks him, "do you need any help with your luggage?"
He said, "No thanks! I'm traveling light!"
He said, "No thanks! I'm traveling light!"
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
He just couldn’t put it down.
He just couldn’t put it down.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists find it easy to work with ammonia?
It’s pretty basic.
It’s pretty basic.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What happened when carbon and hydrogen went on a date?
They really bonded.
They really bonded.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why should you go drinking with neutrons? Because wherever they go, there’s no charge!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They are cheaper than day rates.
They are cheaper than day rates.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why was the mole of o2 molecules left when he left the bar? Because he got avogadro's number!
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Are you full of beryllium, gold, and titanium?
Because you are BeAuTi-Full
Because you are BeAuTi-Full
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did their friends say when they found out oxygen and magnesium were dating?
A: O-Mg
A: O-Mg
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the man say when his girlfriend threw sodium and chloride at him?
That’s as-salt!
That’s as-salt!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What do chemists call a benzene ring where the carbon atoms are replaced with iron atoms? A ferrous wheel.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Helium walks into a bar,
The bartender says “We don’t serve noble gasses in here.”
Helium doesn’t react.
The bartender says “We don’t serve noble gasses in here.”
Helium doesn’t react.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
HeHe
HeHe
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?
He got Avogadro’s number!
He got Avogadro’s number!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
The optimist sees the glass half full.
The pessimist sees the glass half empty.
The chemist sees the glass completely full, half in the liquid state and half in the vapor state.
The pessimist sees the glass half empty.
The chemist sees the glass completely full, half in the liquid state and half in the vapor state.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?
Breaking up is hard to do.
Breaking up is hard to do.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If H20 is water, what is H204?
Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming
Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Gotta love equilibrium...jk
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I asked my dad what entropy meant.
He said, it isn't what it used to be
He said, it isn't what it used to be
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I would make a "free energy joke" but nobody gibbs a darn
Last edited by 605823283 on Mon Jan 17, 2022 5:08 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What is a billie eilish fan's favorite polyatomic? Ammonia, because it's basic.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why can a photon always avoid paying baggage fees when going on airplanes?
Because it always travels light.
Because it always travels light.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Adrian wrote:What’s a sign of a bad chemistry joke?
No Reaction
It's probably pretty basic too
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you hear the one about cobalt, radon, and yttrium? It was CoRnY.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Two chemists walk into a bar. One says, “I’ll have an H2O.” The other says, “I’ll have an H2O, too.” The second chemist dies.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I heard that Oxygen and Magnesium were going out and I was like OMg.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why can you never trust an atom?
They make up literally everything.
They make up literally everything.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What elements do bracelet makers need most?
(Be)ryllium, (A)rgon, and Sunshine (D)
(Be)ryllium, (A)rgon, and Sunshine (D)
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why can you never trust an atom?
They make up literally everything.
They make up literally everything.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A neutron walks into a bar and asks the bartender how much a drink costs.
“For you, no charge.”
“For you, no charge.”
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the scientist say when he found two isotopes of helium? HeHe
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What do you say when someone throws sodium chloride at you? That’s a salt.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did their friends say when they found out oxygen and magnesium were dating? O-Mg
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Why should you go drinking with neutrons? Because wherever they go, there's no charge!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
How did the hipster chemist burn his hand on the beaker? He picked it up before it was cool.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What was Avogadro's favorite sport? Golf! He always got a mole-in-one!
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