Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

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Philline_Tumbaga_1F
Posts: 14
Joined: Fri Jul 15, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Philline_Tumbaga_1F » Sat Feb 18, 2017 3:33 am

Since it's love month, here's a pickup line you could use. lol

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Elle_Bertuccelli_1B
Posts: 24
Joined: Sat Jul 09, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Elle_Bertuccelli_1B » Sat Feb 18, 2017 10:46 am

What do you do with a sick chemist?

If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium

Paola_RubioRod_1F
Posts: 18
Joined: Fri Jan 08, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Paola_RubioRod_1F » Sat Feb 18, 2017 11:13 am

Two electrons are sitting in a jail cell.
One asks, "What are you in for?"
The other replies, "For attempting a forbidden transition."

rielapopp3O
Posts: 14
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 3:00 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby rielapopp3O » Sat Feb 18, 2017 12:34 pm

Don't ever get a chemist angry. They'll overreact!

804780590
Posts: 21
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:57 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 804780590 » Sat Feb 18, 2017 12:37 pm

This page needs to
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drakechem.jpg

sheilaho_1E
Posts: 20
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:59 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby sheilaho_1E » Sat Feb 18, 2017 12:46 pm

Here is a historical note: In the 1980's, in an effort to increase public awareness about the importance of chemistry, the American Chemical Society posted billboards with a picture of C6H10 and the title, "It takes alkynes to make a world."

Lindsey Lill
Posts: 34
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:57 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Lindsey Lill » Sat Feb 18, 2017 1:53 pm

Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero?

He's 0K now.

Lyndon_Bui_3J
Posts: 27
Joined: Sat Jul 09, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Lyndon_Bui_3J » Sat Feb 18, 2017 1:55 pm

What do you call an acid with an attitude?

A-mean-oh acid!

Lei Wena Herme 1O
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Lei Wena Herme 1O » Sat Feb 18, 2017 2:22 pm

A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner.
"Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined.
"I melt whenever I see you," The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."

StevenBieneman_3K
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:58 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby StevenBieneman_3K » Sat Feb 18, 2017 2:33 pm

If H2O is water, what is H2O4?

Drinking, swimming, showering, etc.

004599434
Posts: 19
Joined: Sat Jul 23, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 004599434 » Sat Feb 18, 2017 2:57 pm

Want to hear a joke about sodium hypobromite?
NaBrO

Rory_Grant_3E
Posts: 13
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:57 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Rory_Grant_3E » Sat Feb 18, 2017 3:48 pm

I thought this one was pretty good.
Attachments
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Katelyn Li 2J
Posts: 27
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 3:00 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Katelyn Li 2J » Sat Feb 18, 2017 3:53 pm

Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium? It went OK.

DhirajR_3F
Posts: 9
Joined: Sat Jul 09, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby DhirajR_3F » Sat Feb 18, 2017 4:03 pm

How often do I tell Chemistry jokes?




Periodically!

KoSiOg
Posts: 13
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:58 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby KoSiOg » Sat Feb 18, 2017 4:20 pm

I told a chemistry joke...

There was no reaction!

Tiffany Jeng 1L
Posts: 22
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:58 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Tiffany Jeng 1L » Sat Feb 18, 2017 4:28 pm

A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."

Vagarshak 2C
Posts: 6
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:55 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Vagarshak 2C » Sat Feb 18, 2017 4:42 pm

awesome-tumblr-1001_o_4508515.jpg

Morgan_McMasters_3A
Posts: 14
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Morgan_McMasters_3A » Sat Feb 18, 2017 6:05 pm

Two chemists go into a bar. The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O." The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" — and he died.

Justin_Bueno_2O
Posts: 20
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Justin_Bueno_2O » Sat Feb 18, 2017 6:34 pm

Chem
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ryan_chowdhury_2E
Posts: 12
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:56 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby ryan_chowdhury_2E » Sat Feb 18, 2017 6:34 pm

Have you heard Enthalpy's new mixtape "Constant Pressure"? They say it's pure heat.

christy_zambrano_2E
Posts: 11
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:57 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby christy_zambrano_2E » Sat Feb 18, 2017 7:00 pm

too cute!
Attachments
lol.jpg

Franklin Kong 3D
Posts: 22
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am
Been upvoted: 1 time

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Franklin Kong 3D » Sat Feb 18, 2017 8:44 pm

A student is very late to his chemistry lab class, arriving when there are only 5 minutes left. Realizing he won't have time to complete the lab, which involves looking at a sample of water under a microscope and recording observations, the student scribbles in his notebook "I saw twice as many H's as I did O's."

604805638
Posts: 19
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:59 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 604805638 » Sat Feb 18, 2017 9:35 pm

DJ Enzyme!
Attachments
Chem.jpg

Jenny_Thompson_3I
Posts: 25
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:59 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Jenny_Thompson_3I » Sat Feb 18, 2017 10:12 pm

"Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?"

"Helium walks into a bar,
The bartender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."
Helium doesn't react."

"The optimist sees the glass half full.
The pessimist sees the glass half empty.
The chemist sees the glass completely full, half in the liquid state and half in the vapor state."

Katherine_Ly_1H
Posts: 10
Joined: Sat Jul 09, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Katherine_Ly_1H » Sat Feb 18, 2017 10:29 pm

What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

A one molar solution.

Anmol Dhaliwal 2C
Posts: 25
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:57 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Anmol Dhaliwal 2C » Sat Feb 18, 2017 10:35 pm

Q: Why do chemistry students do well when working with ammonia?
A: Because it's pretty basic stuff.

Bola_G_3H
Posts: 12
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:56 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Bola_G_3H » Sat Feb 18, 2017 10:46 pm

If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they’d be alloys.

Yamilex Velgara 2I
Posts: 21
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:59 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Yamilex Velgara 2I » Sat Feb 18, 2017 10:46 pm

Since Valentine's Day just passed
Attachments
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Victoria Vu 3L
Posts: 15
Joined: Fri Jul 15, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Victoria Vu 3L » Sat Feb 18, 2017 11:03 pm

I'm not ready to learn organic chemistry yet.
I'm sure I'll run into alkynes of problems.

F Rios 3E
Posts: 7
Joined: Wed Nov 18, 2015 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby F Rios 3E » Sat Feb 18, 2017 11:29 pm

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Samantha_Leong_3K
Posts: 20
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:56 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Samantha_Leong_3K » Sat Feb 18, 2017 11:55 pm

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Zhiyong Xie 3K
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:55 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Zhiyong Xie 3K » Sun Feb 19, 2017 12:31 am

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Milan Hirpara 3K
Posts: 20
Joined: Sat Jul 09, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Milan Hirpara 3K » Sun Feb 19, 2017 12:50 am

Q: Oxygen and Potassium went on a date. How do you think it went?
A: OK!

Chin_Alyssa_3I
Posts: 34
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Chin_Alyssa_3I » Sun Feb 19, 2017 12:58 am

I want to post a joke, but all the good ones Ar (Argon)

JulieLy_3C
Posts: 19
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby JulieLy_3C » Sun Feb 19, 2017 12:58 am

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Alice Gonzalez 2F
Posts: 11
Joined: Mon Jul 11, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Alice Gonzalez 2F » Sun Feb 19, 2017 2:03 am

A neutron walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender replies, "for you, no charge".

Cowasjee_Sanaea_3E
Posts: 27
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Cowasjee_Sanaea_3E » Sun Feb 19, 2017 2:36 am

Q: Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
A: They're cheaper than day rates.

Hung_Sabrina_3N
Posts: 22
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Hung_Sabrina_3N » Sun Feb 19, 2017 8:45 am

Q: What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A: A ferrous wheel:
Fe - Fe
/ \
Fe Fe
\ /
Fe - Fe

Hung_Sabrina_3N
Posts: 22
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Hung_Sabrina_3N » Sun Feb 19, 2017 8:46 am

Q: What did the chemical agent say?
A: My name is Bond, Ionic Bond. Taken, not shared

Shailyn_Moore_3C
Posts: 21
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:59 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Shailyn_Moore_3C » Sun Feb 19, 2017 9:16 am

Organic chemistry is difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.

Xinyi_Yan_3L
Posts: 21
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:56 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Xinyi_Yan_3L » Sun Feb 19, 2017 10:02 am

IMG_1909.JPG

Jessica_Zeng_3G
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Jessica_Zeng_3G » Sun Feb 19, 2017 10:13 am

Why did the acid go to the gym?

To become a buffer solution!

Aleena_Sorf_2A
Posts: 22
Joined: Sat Jul 09, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Aleena_Sorf_2A » Sun Feb 19, 2017 10:14 am

Helium walks into a bar.
The bar tender says, “We don’t serve noble gasses in here.”
Helium doesn’t react.

Lexy Swenson 1F
Posts: 21
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Lexy Swenson 1F » Sun Feb 19, 2017 10:17 am

Why do chemistry professors like to teach about ammonia?
Because it's basic stuff.

Why did Carbon marry Hydrogen?
They bonded well from the minute they met

A small piece of sodium which lived in a testube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Bunsen! my flame! I melt whenever I see you" said the sodium. The bunsen burner replied :"It's just a phase you're going through"

Diana_Anum1G
Posts: 30
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:59 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Diana_Anum1G » Sun Feb 19, 2017 10:47 am

Friend: Hey, what show does cesium and iodine love watching together?
Me: I don't know, CSI?

Krista Yang 1C
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:55 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Krista Yang 1C » Sun Feb 19, 2017 10:51 am

Q: Why does a hamburger have lower energy than a steak?
A: It's in the ground state.

Marissa Stinnett 1E
Posts: 17
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:59 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Marissa Stinnett 1E » Sun Feb 19, 2017 12:34 pm

Even though we aren't on this unit anymore, who doesn't love a star wars reference here and there?!

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Jessica De Anda 2C
Posts: 11
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:55 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Jessica De Anda 2C » Sun Feb 19, 2017 12:37 pm

What is a cation afraid of?

A dogion

Brandon_Williams_3E
Posts: 12
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:59 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Brandon_Williams_3E » Sun Feb 19, 2017 12:54 pm

Electrochemistry joke
Attachments
chemjoke.png

KarinaOropeza_2L
Posts: 13
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:58 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby KarinaOropeza_2L » Sun Feb 19, 2017 1:16 pm

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Michelle Lin 3M
Posts: 12
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:55 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Michelle Lin 3M » Sun Feb 19, 2017 1:20 pm

That feeling when you know chemistry jokes but they're all boron.

Jagmeet_Arora_1G
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Jagmeet_Arora_1G » Sun Feb 19, 2017 2:05 pm

Goals:
Q: Why did the acid go to the gym?
A: To become a buffer solution!

Ikechukwu Ofoegbu 3D
Posts: 18
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:58 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Ikechukwu Ofoegbu 3D » Sun Feb 19, 2017 3:02 pm

Q: What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
A: One molar solution.

April Z 1K
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby April Z 1K » Sun Feb 19, 2017 3:05 pm

Q: Why do chemistry students do well when working with ammonia?
A: Because it's pretty basic stuff.

Deanna_Nguyen_3L
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Deanna_Nguyen_3L » Sun Feb 19, 2017 3:50 pm

Q: What does a chemist bring as a dessert while camping?
A: A ‘gram’ cracker.

Avery_E
Posts: 6
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:55 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Avery_E » Sun Feb 19, 2017 4:14 pm

Q:How do sulfur and oxygen communicate?
A: A sulphone!
Last edited by Avery_E on Sun Feb 19, 2017 4:28 pm, edited 2 times in total.

katherine_r
Posts: 7
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:55 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby katherine_r » Sun Feb 19, 2017 4:20 pm

In a sports relay race, a chemical kinetics specialist runs slowly, and his group loses the race.

When the chemical kinetics specialist is asked why he ran slowly, his reply was "I always wanted to be the significant rate determining step."

Harmeet_Kaur_2D
Posts: 8
Joined: Fri Jul 15, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Harmeet_Kaur_2D » Sun Feb 19, 2017 4:21 pm

What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder?

"You may have graduated but I've got many degrees."

FaithPigeon_1E
Posts: 20
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:59 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby FaithPigeon_1E » Sun Feb 19, 2017 4:23 pm

If I were a dj I'd name myself DJ Enzyme because I'm always breaking it down

Shushanna S 3F
Posts: 24
Joined: Sat Jul 09, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Shushanna S 3F » Sun Feb 19, 2017 5:28 pm

Friend texts me: Hey do you think we can hang out?

Me: NOBr, I'm busy.

*starts laughing at own joke*

Ivanna_Tang_3B
Posts: 22
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:58 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Ivanna_Tang_3B » Sun Feb 19, 2017 5:30 pm

A chemistry teacher is recruited as a radio operator in the first world war. He soon becomes familiar with the military habit of abbreviating everything. As his unit comes under a sustained enemy attack, he is asked to urgently inform his HQ.
"NaCl over NaOH! NaCl over NaOH!" he says.
"NaCl over NaOH?" shouts his officer. "What do you mean?"
"The base is under a salt!" The chemist replied.

danny_nguyen_3C
Posts: 14
Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2016 3:02 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby danny_nguyen_3C » Sun Feb 19, 2017 5:42 pm

I wanted to make a clever chemistry joke, but all the good ones Argon.

Breanna Buhay 2H
Posts: 21
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 3:00 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Breanna Buhay 2H » Sun Feb 19, 2017 6:02 pm

"You may have graduated but I've got many degrees."

Desiree Martin 2A
Posts: 25
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Chemistry Joke :)

Postby Desiree Martin 2A » Sun Feb 19, 2017 6:14 pm

nz069.jpg

Sally_Tu_1H
Posts: 22
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am
Been upvoted: 1 time

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Sally_Tu_1H » Sun Feb 19, 2017 6:26 pm

Q: Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?
A: Because it's pretty basic stuff.

Cerjay_Lugtu_3B
Posts: 14
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:58 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Cerjay_Lugtu_3B » Sun Feb 19, 2017 6:28 pm

"What do you do to a dead scientist?"

'You Barium."

Samya Konda 2I
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:58 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Samya Konda 2I » Sun Feb 19, 2017 6:34 pm

In a sports relay race, a chemical kinetics specialist runs slowly, and his group loses the race.

When the chemical kinetics specialist is asked why he ran slowly, his reply was “I always wanted to be the significant rate determining step”.

ckim_1I
Posts: 21
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby ckim_1I » Sun Feb 19, 2017 6:35 pm

Questionable?
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Novelpreet_Boparai1N
Posts: 19
Joined: Fri Jul 15, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Novelpreet_Boparai1N » Sun Feb 19, 2017 6:57 pm

I would never poison you. Now eat your Pb and Jelly sandwich.

Sarah Sackey_3G
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:59 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Sarah Sackey_3G » Sun Feb 19, 2017 7:02 pm

Attachments
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Arianna_Mandelli_3C
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:58 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Arianna_Mandelli_3C » Sun Feb 19, 2017 7:30 pm

What do you call Iron blowing in the wind?

Fe-breeze

Abishek 3K
Posts: 15
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:59 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Abishek 3K » Sun Feb 19, 2017 7:42 pm

.
Attachments
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tumblr_ljg0zfditn1qdyovpo1_400.jpg (30.44 KiB) Viewed 5798 times

HimadreeR
Posts: 5
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:55 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby HimadreeR » Sun Feb 19, 2017 7:53 pm

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Teja_Kadali_3A
Posts: 10
Joined: Sat Jul 09, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Teja_Kadali_3A » Sun Feb 19, 2017 8:08 pm

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Kareem
Posts: 18
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 3:00 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Kareem » Sun Feb 19, 2017 8:09 pm

I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite…
He said NaBrO

Thomas Morgan 1B
Posts: 7
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:55 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Thomas Morgan 1B » Sun Feb 19, 2017 8:10 pm

Q: What element is derived from a Norse [censored]?
A: Thorium.

Thomas_Elizabeth_3A
Posts: 11
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:57 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Thomas_Elizabeth_3A » Sun Feb 19, 2017 8:14 pm

If a King farts is it a noble gas?

Omeed_Partovi_1L
Posts: 12
Joined: Sat Jul 09, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Omeed_Partovi_1L » Sun Feb 19, 2017 8:45 pm

Who took a bigger L:
USC or me on the Chem midterm??

Michael Sparks 2F
Posts: 20
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Michael Sparks 2F » Sun Feb 19, 2017 8:46 pm

Omeed_Partovi_1L wrote:Who took a bigger L:
USC or me on the Chem midterm??


You silly!

Tina_Keshishian_2F
Posts: 19
Joined: Tue Oct 04, 2016 3:02 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Tina_Keshishian_2F » Sun Feb 19, 2017 8:49 pm

Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

-They're cheaper than day rates.

lisabang2L
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed Sep 28, 2016 3:01 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby lisabang2L » Sun Feb 19, 2017 8:51 pm

In a sports relay race, a chemical kinetics specialist runs slowly, and his group loses the race.

When the chemical kinetics specialist is asked why he ran slowly, his reply was “I always wanted to be the significant rate determining step”.

Timothy Yu 2M
Posts: 17
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:58 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Timothy Yu 2M » Sun Feb 19, 2017 8:54 pm

"Did you hear about Oxygen and Magnesium dating?"
"I've heard this before, it's OMg!"
"No, hasn't Lavelle taught you anything?! It's MgO"

Ethan_Kato_1D
Posts: 25
Joined: Fri Jul 15, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Ethan_Kato_1D » Sun Feb 19, 2017 8:59 pm

Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They are cost less than day rates!!!!

Adrienne Johnson 1D
Posts: 19
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Adrienne Johnson 1D » Sun Feb 19, 2017 9:03 pm

What is a cation afraid of?

A dog ion

Adrienne Johnson 1D
Posts: 19
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Adrienne Johnson 1D » Sun Feb 19, 2017 9:04 pm

Why did Carbon marry Hydrogen?

They bonded well from the minute they met.

Amanda Salgado 3D
Posts: 22
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 3:00 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Amanda Salgado 3D » Sun Feb 19, 2017 9:07 pm

Are all my jokes too basic for you? Why is there no reaction?

Julianne_Zingmond_1E
Posts: 22
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:59 pm
Been upvoted: 1 time

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Julianne_Zingmond_1E » Sun Feb 19, 2017 9:08 pm

Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273˚C and still be 0k?

Matthew Yeganeh 3M
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:55 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Matthew Yeganeh 3M » Sun Feb 19, 2017 9:15 pm

I don't have any good chemistry jokes to tell. All the best jokes Argon.

Frank_Smith_3L
Posts: 11
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:55 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Frank_Smith_3L » Sun Feb 19, 2017 9:16 pm

What is a minion's favorite element sequence? Barium, Sodium, Sodium!!!

Kimberly_Hernandez_3L
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:55 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Kimberly_Hernandez_3L » Sun Feb 19, 2017 9:18 pm

Why are so many chemist alcoholics? Because alcohol is a solution

kgiesch1N
Posts: 9
Joined: Fri Jul 15, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby kgiesch1N » Sun Feb 19, 2017 9:33 pm

you must be made of uranium and iodine because all I can see is U and I

Kimberly_Hoh_2A
Posts: 20
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 3:00 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Kimberly_Hoh_2A » Sun Feb 19, 2017 9:45 pm

Why did Carbon and Helium get married?
They bonded well from the moment they met.

Yeon Hee Park 3M
Posts: 11
Joined: Mon Sep 26, 2016 3:01 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Yeon Hee Park 3M » Sun Feb 19, 2017 9:47 pm

i can't say its a joke but had to buy this at Trader Joe's
Attachments
WtOa34o.jpg

Sarahi Garza 3k
Posts: 16
Joined: Wed Sep 21, 2016 2:57 pm

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Sarahi Garza 3k » Sun Feb 19, 2017 9:52 pm

People in Trump's administration are like atoms...

because they make up everything!

*Not my original joke*

Wesley_Rugen_1E
Posts: 23
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Wesley_Rugen_1E » Sun Feb 19, 2017 9:55 pm

Since we are studying kinetics:

In a sports relay race, a chemical kinetics specialist runs slowly, and his group loses the race.

When the chemical kinetics specialist is asked why he ran slowly, his reply was "I always wanted to be the significant rate determining step."

ChristinaRoble3J
Posts: 14
Joined: Fri Jul 15, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby ChristinaRoble3J » Sun Feb 19, 2017 10:01 pm

This isn't really a joke, but a chemistry pickup line

Do you have 11 protons?
Bc you're sodium fine

Jennifer Ngo 1M
Posts: 23
Joined: Sat Jul 09, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Jennifer Ngo 1M » Sun Feb 19, 2017 10:02 pm

did you know the sun doesn't have to go to college cause it already has 28 million degrees :-)

Gabriela_2E
Posts: 12
Joined: Fri Jun 17, 2016 11:28 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Gabriela_2E » Sun Feb 19, 2017 10:02 pm

do-you-have-any-sodium-hypobromite.jpg

Quynh Nguyen 2H
Posts: 7
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Quynh Nguyen 2H » Sun Feb 19, 2017 10:26 pm

Q: why do chemistry professors like to teach about ammonia?
A: Because it is basic material.

If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate

Spencer Peterman 3E
Posts: 18
Joined: Fri Jul 22, 2016 3:00 am
Been upvoted: 1 time

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Spencer Peterman 3E » Sun Feb 19, 2017 10:26 pm

Image


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