Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

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Chem_Mod
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Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Chem_Mod » Mon Nov 10, 2014 12:22 pm

We had a fun review session on Friday November 7 and I encourage all students to view it as there were many excellent Q&A.

I started my review session by reading out the following chemistry joke given to me by a student:

Q. Why should you never trust atoms?
A. Because they make up everything!

Anyone wanting to post chemistry jokes can post under this topic.

Jenna Kovsky 1I
Posts: 13
Joined: Fri Sep 26, 2014 1:02 pm

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Jenna Kovsky 1I » Mon Nov 10, 2014 9:35 pm

I heard Potassium and Oxygen went on a date....It went OK

Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium

Q: What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?
A: Polar Bond

aimee1J
Posts: 8
Joined: Fri Sep 26, 2014 1:02 pm

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby aimee1J » Mon Nov 10, 2014 9:55 pm

At the end of the semester, a chemistry teacher asked her students what was the most important thing that they learned in lab. A student promptly raised his hand and said, "Never lick the spoon."

Q: Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?
A: Because it's in the ground state.

Heisenberg and Schrodinger are driving down the road when a cop pulls them over. The cop asks Heisenberg "Do you know how fast you were going back there?" Heisenberg replies "No, but I can tell you exactly where I was." The cop, now suspicious, proceeds to search the car. Upon opening the trunk he exclaims "Hey, you have a dead cat back here!" to which Schrodinger replies "Well now I do! Thanks."

Chem_Mod
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Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Chem_Mod » Tue Nov 11, 2014 11:17 am

WOW you guys are on fire!
These are excellent jokes.

Evamae Bayudan 1B
Posts: 12
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Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Evamae Bayudan 1B » Tue Nov 18, 2014 7:23 pm

Here are some more jokes!

Q: Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
A: They're cheaper than day rates.

Q: What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?
A: CSI

Chem_Mod
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Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Chem_Mod » Sat Nov 22, 2014 6:09 pm

Great jokes.

Friday December 5th will be Student Joke Day.
Come tell your favorite chemistry joke to the class!

Shreyesi Srivastava 2D
Posts: 11
Joined: Fri Sep 26, 2014 1:02 pm

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Shreyesi Srivastava 2D » Mon Nov 24, 2014 1:56 am

Do you have 11 protons?
Cause you sodium fine

Nima Ghorashi 3A
Posts: 16
Joined: Fri Sep 26, 2014 1:02 pm

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Nima Ghorashi 3A » Tue Nov 25, 2014 5:32 pm

Friend: "Johnny, why have you been so upset and frustrated lately?"

Johnny: "Well, I have taken two years and a quarter of chemistry, and I have yet to get this girl's significant digits."

Franklin Liu 3H
Posts: 12
Joined: Fri Sep 26, 2014 1:02 pm

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Franklin Liu 3H » Thu Nov 27, 2014 8:20 pm

Two friends walk into a bar. The first says, "I'll have some H2O." The second says, "I'll have some H2O too." Then he dies.

Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was polar.

mikyjordan_dis3K
Posts: 3
Joined: Fri Sep 26, 2014 1:02 pm

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby mikyjordan_dis3K » Fri Dec 05, 2014 2:33 pm

In honor of joke day and the quiz we just took:

What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

wait for it..

A ferrous wheel.

Victoria Liang 3L
Posts: 11
Joined: Fri Sep 26, 2014 1:02 pm

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Victoria Liang 3L » Tue Dec 09, 2014 8:36 pm

Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
It went OK.

William DesRoches 1E
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri Sep 26, 2014 1:02 pm

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby William DesRoches 1E » Fri Dec 12, 2014 12:22 am

Silver walks up to gold in a bar and says, "Au, get outta here!"

Organic chemistry is difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.

Chem_Mod
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Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Chem_Mod » Thu Mar 12, 2015 5:14 pm

Some people call me a nerd.

I prefer the term Intellectual Badass.

Chem_Mod
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Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Chem_Mod » Thu Mar 12, 2015 5:17 pm

You'd think that atoms bonding with other atoms would mean they're being friendly, but really they steal each other's electrons.

How ionic.

Chem_Mod
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Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Chem_Mod » Thu Mar 12, 2015 5:21 pm

My name is Bond
.
.
Covalent Bond.

Kayla Denton 1A
Posts: 106
Joined: Fri Sep 26, 2014 1:02 pm

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Kayla Denton 1A » Thu Mar 12, 2015 7:33 pm

An atom says, "I think I lost an electron." His friend asks, "Are you sure?" and the atom replies, "I'm positive."

Chem_Mod
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Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Chem_Mod » Thu Mar 12, 2015 8:59 pm

I would tell a Chemistry Joke but all the good ones Argon.

Keep it up!

Nicholas Codallos 4C
Posts: 19
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Nicholas Codallos 4C » Fri Oct 02, 2015 3:44 pm

Are you full of beryllium, gold, and titanium? Because you are Be-Au-Ti-full!

Jonathan Shih 3H
Posts: 37
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Jonathan Shih 3H » Sat Oct 03, 2015 1:03 am

If H20 is water, what is H204?
Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.

If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
H2O cubed.

Anyone know any jokes about the element sodium?
Na.

Bianca Brown
Posts: 1
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Bianca Brown » Sat Oct 03, 2015 1:07 pm

You must be full of copper and tellurium because you're cute!

Michelle Dela Rosa 1D
Posts: 25
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Michelle Dela Rosa 1D » Thu Oct 08, 2015 11:34 am

What do you call Iron blowing in the wind?

Febreeze

Rita Tran 2B
Posts: 25
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Rita Tran 2B » Sat Oct 10, 2015 8:28 pm

Q: Where does a chemist put the dishes?
A: In the Zinc, of course!


Q: What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder?
A: "You may have graduated but I have many degrees!"


Q: Does light have mass?
A: Of course not! It's not even Catholic!!!

jennifer_zhou2C
Posts: 22
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby jennifer_zhou2C » Fri Oct 30, 2015 11:30 am

Heisenberg calls up Pauli and says, "I have an idea that will revolutionize quantum physics!" to which Pauli replies, "Are you certain?!"
Heisenberg says, "Not at all!"

Chem_Mod
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Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Chem_Mod » Sat Oct 31, 2015 4:10 pm

More excellent jokes this quarter!
:-)

Maybe someone wants to tell one at the end of class on Fridays!

Kelly McBratney 1C
Posts: 23
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Kelly McBratney 1C » Sun Nov 08, 2015 11:23 pm

"Are you Na?
Because you're so-dium fine doe!!"
- Jewel Saad

Anna Nordstrom 1A
Posts: 15
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Anna Nordstrom 1A » Wed Nov 11, 2015 3:21 pm

Enjoy the joke!
Attachments
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Avogadro's Number

Jacqueline Zhang 2A
Posts: 15
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Jacqueline Zhang 2A » Wed Nov 18, 2015 3:46 pm

Why is the pH of Youtube so stable?


Because it constantly buffers.

Jeannie Huang 3B
Posts: 22
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Jeannie Huang 3B » Mon Nov 30, 2015 10:11 am

Q: Why should you never give up studying chemistry even if you feel like you're going to fail the final?

A: Because chem-is-try! <3

Jana Sandhu 3J
Posts: 25
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Jana Sandhu 3J » Mon Nov 30, 2015 4:47 pm

A neutron walks into a bar.
Before leaving, he asks the bartender, "How much?"
The bartender responds, "No charge."

Edris Saadat 1A
Posts: 32
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Edris Saadat 1A » Tue Dec 01, 2015 10:23 pm

What do you call cheese infused in sodium bicarbonate?

NaCHO3 Cheese

Jacob Shalkevich 1A
Posts: 20
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Jacob Shalkevich 1A » Thu Dec 03, 2015 4:14 pm

You know, I would tell a chemistry joke, but all the good ones argon.

HoganFenster2E
Posts: 23
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby HoganFenster2E » Fri Dec 04, 2015 12:38 am

My TA threw some Sodium Chloride at me in discussion today...

That's a-salt!

Chem_Mod
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Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Chem_Mod » Fri Dec 04, 2015 9:26 pm

Anna Nordstrom 1A wrote:Enjoy the joke!


Anna introduce yourself at the beginning of Chem 14B!
:-)

Chem_Mod
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Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Chem_Mod » Fri Dec 04, 2015 9:28 pm

Jacqueline Zhang 1A wrote:Why is the pH of Youtube so stable?


Because it constantly buffers.


Clever!
Introduce yourself at the beginning of Chem 14B.

Jasminemay Barcelon 2G
Posts: 21
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Jasminemay Barcelon 2G » Sat Dec 05, 2015 8:56 pm

A little fun while studying for the final,
-What weapon can you make from the elements potassium, nickel, and iron?
~A KNiFe
-Where;s the best place to buy potassium?
~K-Mart

Andrew Knapp 1A
Posts: 13
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Andrew Knapp 1A » Sat Jan 09, 2016 6:02 pm

Q: How do you tell the difference between a chemist and a train driver?

A: Ask them to pronounce "unionized".

kaushikdr
Posts: 7
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby kaushikdr » Mon Jan 11, 2016 10:05 am

Why did the electron want to go to the party?

Because it was excited

Isa AbdulCader 3K
Posts: 18
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Isa AbdulCader 3K » Mon Jan 11, 2016 2:31 pm

What was the chemist's favorite attraction at the fair?

The ferrous wheel

Amanda Nguyen 2E
Posts: 19
Joined: Tue Nov 25, 2014 3:00 am

Chemistry Jokes

Postby Amanda Nguyen 2E » Mon Jan 11, 2016 3:27 pm

I told a chemistry joke...

There was no reaction!

Chem_Mod
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Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Chem_Mod » Mon Jan 11, 2016 4:51 pm

That's probably because all the good ones argon.

Daniel_Sands3L
Posts: 13
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Daniel_Sands3L » Wed Jan 13, 2016 1:16 am

Why is an electron always depressed?


It's quant-numb and uncertain of its place in the world.

Timmy Gozali
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Timmy Gozali » Wed Jan 13, 2016 1:30 pm

Not exactly a "joke" or entirely Chemistry related, but interesting enough? :D
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Andrew Phan
Posts: 6
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Andrew Phan » Wed Jan 13, 2016 4:23 pm

I asked the guy next to me if he had any sodium hypobromite. He said NaBrO.

catherinewu 3J
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby catherinewu 3J » Wed Jan 13, 2016 5:21 pm

polar bears...
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Tal Boussi 2D
Posts: 11
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Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Tal Boussi 2D » Wed Jan 13, 2016 7:18 pm

me when I don't get enough attention: Sublimation Image

follow up for more chemistry jokes

Tal Boussi 2D
Posts: 11
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Tal Boussi 2D » Wed Jan 13, 2016 7:57 pm

waiting for this to become relevant
Image

follow up for more funny chemistry references

Alex Chiodo Ortiz 3G
Posts: 13
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Alex Chiodo Ortiz 3G » Wed Jan 13, 2016 9:01 pm

I couldn't find any good chemistry jokes because all of the good ones Argon.

Roberto Vasquez 2C
Posts: 4
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Roberto Vasquez 2C » Thu Jan 14, 2016 6:37 pm

Chem Joke.jpg
;)
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BiancaYugar_1D
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby BiancaYugar_1D » Thu Jan 14, 2016 7:17 pm

Awww, this was too cute to pass up.
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Rodrigo Aranda
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Rodrigo Aranda » Fri Jan 15, 2016 12:40 am

A Chemistry lab is like a party...

Some drop acid.. while others drop the base.

Happy Friday ( :

(not original content)

Kelly McBratney 1C
Posts: 23
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Kelly McBratney 1C » Fri Jan 15, 2016 2:11 pm

"I'd make a chemistry joke but all the good ones Argon"

GiselleMartinez_1B
Posts: 9
Joined: Mon Jan 26, 2015 2:17 pm

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby GiselleMartinez_1B » Fri Jan 15, 2016 5:19 pm

First Law people...good stuff
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Lydiaelson1C
Posts: 15
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Lydiaelson1C » Fri Jan 15, 2016 10:22 pm

Throwback to 14A :)
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Photon Joke

Jacob Afable 3J
Posts: 41
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Jacob Afable 3J » Fri Jan 15, 2016 11:32 pm

Who else can relate with this?
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Kyle_Diep_4E
Posts: 13
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Kyle_Diep_4E » Sat Jan 16, 2016 1:32 pm

What do you do when a chemist dies?

You barium!

Daniela Contreras 3E
Posts: 22
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Daniela Contreras 3E » Sat Jan 16, 2016 10:54 pm

Q: What's wrong with a joke involving Cobalt, Radon, and Ytterium?
A: its CoRn Y

Daniela Contreras 3E
Posts: 22
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Daniela Contreras 3E » Sat Jan 16, 2016 10:58 pm

What is the chemical formula for a banana?
BaNa2

Chi-Yun 1B
Posts: 13
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Chi-Yun 1B » Sat Jan 16, 2016 11:08 pm

These chemistry jokes are sodium funny! I slapped my neon that one!

One guacamole is equal to 6.0221415x10^23 "guacas." One might even call it... Avocado's Number!
Attachments
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Mariam Ghattas 2L
Posts: 14
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Mariam Ghattas 2L » Sat Jan 16, 2016 11:18 pm

Q: Why did the acid go to the gym?
A: To become a buffer solution!

Jasminemay Barcelon 2G
Posts: 21
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Jasminemay Barcelon 2G » Sun Jan 17, 2016 7:52 am

Never trust an atom

They make up everything.

Michelle Ouk 3L
Posts: 8
Joined: Mon Jan 26, 2015 2:17 pm

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Michelle Ouk 3L » Sun Jan 17, 2016 10:21 am

Q: Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?
A: Because it's pretty basic stuff.

A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."
The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."

Mieka McFarlane 2L
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Mieka McFarlane 2L » Sun Jan 17, 2016 12:41 pm

What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of helium? HeHe

Nicole Filbert 1D
Posts: 24
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Nicole Filbert 1D » Sun Jan 17, 2016 5:11 pm

Q: Sulfur and Oxygen are best friends, but they lived far from each other. How did oxygen chat with his friend?

A: He used his Sulfone

Samantha Miceli 3J
Posts: 20
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Samantha Miceli 3J » Sun Jan 17, 2016 5:46 pm

Which one are you?
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Aschreck 2G
Posts: 9
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Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Aschreck 2G » Sun Jan 17, 2016 6:39 pm

Take all your lame chemistry jokes and barium.

Naiomi Desai
Posts: 9
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Naiomi Desai » Sun Jan 17, 2016 9:05 pm

- Wanna hear a joke about potassium?

"K"

- Why did the White Bear dissolve in water?

Because it was polar! :)

- After this joke, I expect a chemistry major to say, "Hey girl, Iodate you!"

- Do I have any Sodium Hypobromite for the lab, you ask?

NaHBrO

Alysson Marines 2E
Posts: 17
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Alysson Marines 2E » Sun Jan 17, 2016 11:02 pm

Why did the acid go to the gym?

To become a buffer solution.

Andrew Knapp 1A
Posts: 13
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Andrew Knapp 1A » Sun Jan 17, 2016 11:19 pm

Einstein, Newton and Pascal are playing a rousing game of hide and seek. Einstein begins to count to ten. Pascal runs and hides. Newton draws a one meter by one meter square in the ground in front of Einstein then stands in the middle of it. Einstein reaches ten, uncovers his eyes, and exclaims “Newton! I found you! You’re it!” Newton replies “You didn’t find me. You found a Newton over a square meter. You found Pascal!”

Mariah Tumbaga 1e
Posts: 26
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Mariah Tumbaga 1e » Mon Jan 18, 2016 12:39 am

What did the scientists say when he saw 2 isotopes of Helium?
HeHe

This person went to the doctor concerned over a mole they had on their skin. The doctor asked what the mole looked like and the person responded "6.02x10^23".

904638389
Posts: 16
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby 904638389 » Mon Jan 18, 2016 11:08 am

What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe

Hannah Ship 2H
Posts: 15
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Hannah Ship 2H » Mon Jan 18, 2016 3:54 pm

Q: What did one titration say to the other?
A: "Let's meet at the endpoint"

904418641
Posts: 10
Joined: Wed Nov 18, 2015 3:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby 904418641 » Mon Jan 18, 2016 11:40 pm

If a king farts, is it a noble gas?

Joshua Wiedner
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Joshua Wiedner » Tue Jan 19, 2016 12:48 am

What happens to nitrogen as the sun rises?
It becomes daytrogen!

Andrew Ghaly 3H
Posts: 12
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Andrew Ghaly 3H » Tue Jan 19, 2016 2:20 pm

Lol
Image

Adriana Juarez 1
Posts: 19
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Adriana Juarez 1 » Tue Jan 19, 2016 4:06 pm

lol
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Leslie Romo 1C
Posts: 21
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Leslie Romo 1C » Tue Jan 19, 2016 7:58 pm

=)
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Kavya Shivaram 1G
Posts: 14
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Kavya Shivaram 1G » Tue Jan 19, 2016 10:41 pm

Why does a hamburger have lower energy than a steak?

It's in the ground state.

keenanlee0134
Posts: 1
Joined: Mon Jan 26, 2015 2:17 pm

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby keenanlee0134 » Thu Jan 21, 2016 3:29 pm

Image

Lanzel Patawaran 1A
Posts: 16
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Lanzel Patawaran 1A » Thu Jan 21, 2016 4:00 pm

Screen Shot 2016-01-13 at 4.21.32 PM.png

haleyf 2I
Posts: 12
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby haleyf 2I » Thu Jan 21, 2016 7:59 pm

Little Willie was a chemist. Little Willie is no more. What he thought was H2O was H2SO4.

Rodrigo Aranda
Posts: 5
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Rodrigo Aranda » Thu Jan 21, 2016 9:18 pm

Why do chemist call Helium, Curium, & Barium the Medical Elements?

BECAUSE, if you can't Helium, or Curium, you Barium!

Susanna
Posts: 11
Joined: Tue Nov 17, 2015 3:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Susanna » Thu Jan 21, 2016 10:53 pm

What's the chemical formula of coffee? CoFe2

What about the chemical formula for a banana? BaNa2

Susanna
Posts: 11
Joined: Tue Nov 17, 2015 3:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Susanna » Thu Jan 21, 2016 11:16 pm

This class might be difficult; we will have alkynes of trouble.


By the way, I had to make these bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon.

Alex Chiodo Ortiz 3G
Posts: 13
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Alex Chiodo Ortiz 3G » Fri Jan 22, 2016 12:49 pm

Have you heard about the chemist who was reading a book about Helium?
He just couldn't put it down.

Xinjie Su 2J
Posts: 19
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Xinjie Su 2J » Fri Jan 22, 2016 3:43 pm

One property of liquid is that it can fit into containers of any shape and automatically takes up all the space.

So...cat is a liquid!!
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CenCen
Posts: 29
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby CenCen » Fri Jan 22, 2016 7:23 pm

i was thinking about this a few days ago and found someone had created this! :)
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Roberto Vasquez 2C
Posts: 4
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Roberto Vasquez 2C » Fri Jan 22, 2016 7:35 pm

Why is Willard Gibbs considered to be the nicest scientist?

....

Because he Gibbs free energy!!!!!!

MichelleVu2H
Posts: 6
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby MichelleVu2H » Fri Jan 22, 2016 9:30 pm

Do you have mole problems?
If so, call Avogrado at 602-1023

CalebLew1C
Posts: 8
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby CalebLew1C » Sat Jan 23, 2016 2:10 pm

haha
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JasmineChavez 1E
Posts: 29
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby JasmineChavez 1E » Sat Jan 23, 2016 5:55 pm

The periodic table is incomplete....

Because only Chuck Norris knows the element of surprise >;)

Daniela Contreras 3E
Posts: 22
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Daniela Contreras 3E » Sat Jan 23, 2016 9:27 pm

Hey guys remember: don't trust atoms, they make everything up!

Daniela Contreras 3E
Posts: 22
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Daniela Contreras 3E » Sat Jan 23, 2016 9:29 pm

Q: What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?
A: CSI

Chi-Yun 1B
Posts: 13
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Chi-Yun 1B » Sat Jan 23, 2016 11:55 pm

I'm out of chemistry jokes. I should zinc of a new one!

Frances Relampagos 1J
Posts: 9
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Frances Relampagos 1J » Sun Jan 24, 2016 11:30 am

Q: When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?
A:C over lambda.

Two chemists go into a bar. The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O." The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" — and he died.

Nataliya Karashchuk
Posts: 13
Joined: Fri Oct 02, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Nataliya Karashchuk » Sun Jan 24, 2016 6:07 pm

Image

Mieka McFarlane 2L
Posts: 10
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Mieka McFarlane 2L » Sun Jan 24, 2016 8:34 pm

Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?

Mariam Ghattas 2L
Posts: 14
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Mariam Ghattas 2L » Sun Jan 24, 2016 8:36 pm

Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"

Rachel Risoleo 3G
Posts: 19
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Rachel Risoleo 3G » Sun Jan 24, 2016 9:39 pm

Why did the acid go to the gym?
-To become a buffer solution!

Why did the big white bear dissolve in water?
-Because he was polar.

What do dipoles say in passing?
-Have you got a moment?

(no original content)

kaushikdr
Posts: 7
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby kaushikdr » Sun Jan 24, 2016 10:55 pm

Why did the chemist not go to med school?

Because he didn't go to discussion!

Alysson Marines 2E
Posts: 17
Joined: Fri Sep 25, 2015 2:00 am

Re: Chemistry Jokes

Postby Alysson Marines 2E » Sun Jan 24, 2016 11:57 pm

What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution


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