Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms? A: A ferrous wheel.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
When someone posts a really obvious question on Chem Community...
Everyone:
Everyone:
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why should you go drinking with neutrons? Because wherever they go, there's no charge!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A neutron walks into a shop and says, "I would like a coke."
The shopkeeper serves up the coke.
"How much will that be?" asks the neutron.
The shopkeeper replies, "For you? No charge."
The shopkeeper serves up the coke.
"How much will that be?" asks the neutron.
The shopkeeper replies, "For you? No charge."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A proton and a neutron were walking down the street. The proton says, "Stop, I dropped an electron. Help me look for it." The neutron asks, "Are you sure?" The proton replies, "Yes, I'm positive."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Silver walks up to gold in a store and says, "Au, get out of here!"
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What weapon can you make from the elements potassium, nickel and iron? A KNiFe.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Anna Wu 1H wrote:What is the chemical formula of coffee?
CoFe2
Isn’t this CoFeFe? LOL
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I tried writing jokes about the periodic table... but I realized it wasn't in my element
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender gives him a smile and says, "For you, no charge."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A photon checks into a hotel, and the desk clerk asks, "Have you any luggage?"
To which the photon replies, "No, I'm travelling light."
To which the photon replies, "No, I'm travelling light."
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A man walks into a bar and asks for some H2O the man next to him says he’ll have some H2O too but he dies.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What do chemists call a party where human-human interactions are negligible?
Ideal!
Ideal!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Two chemists walk into a bar. One tells the bartender, "I'll have an H2O." The other says, "I'll have an H2O too!" The second chemist dies.
Found this one online and it made me laugh a little bit harder than I should’ve.
Found this one online and it made me laugh a little bit harder than I should’ve.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Two chemists walk into a bar.
One says, “I’ll have an H2O.” The other says, “I’ll have an H2O, too.” The second chemist dies.
One says, “I’ll have an H2O.” The other says, “I’ll have an H2O, too.” The second chemist dies.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you hear that oxygen went on a date with potassium?
It went OK.
It went OK.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the scientist say when he found two isotopes of Helium?
HeHe
HeHe
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why does a hamburger yield lower energy than a steak?
Because it's in the ground state.
Because it's in the ground state.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists like working with ammonia?
It's pretty basic stuff.
It's pretty basic stuff.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Finals are coming...
but my last brain cells argon...
My gpa and social life argonna be gone soon too..
but my last brain cells argon...
My gpa and social life argonna be gone soon too..
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of helium? HeHe
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Little Billy was a chemist
Little Billy is no more
What he thought was H2O
was really H2SO4!
Little Billy is no more
What he thought was H2O
was really H2SO4!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Good luck studying for the final! Here’s a meme if you’re on study break:
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Heres a fun way to memorize the three (OH)2 strong bases:
"drink your milk (Ca (OH)2) so you can be a strong (Sr (OH)2) baller (Ba (OH)2)"!!!
"drink your milk (Ca (OH)2) so you can be a strong (Sr (OH)2) baller (Ba (OH)2)"!!!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the hydrogen atom say to the other atom?
I think we should bond
I think we should bond
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why are long-distance relationships harder?
The force of attraction is weaker as distance increases.
The force of attraction is weaker as distance increases.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
why do the call Helium Barium and Curium the medical elements
Because if you cant Helium or Curium then you Barium
Because if you cant Helium or Curium then you Barium
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What do you always get with your extra swipes at Rende during Week 10?
5 8 56
*periodictable.jpg
5 8 56
*periodictable.jpg
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?
-Because it's pretty basic stuff.
-Because it's pretty basic stuff.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Two chemists walk into a bar. One tells the bartender, "I'll have an H2O." The other says, "I'll have an H2O too!" The second chemist dies.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why did the attacking army use acid? To neutralize the enemy's base!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What do you do with a sick chemist? If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walk into a bar."OH SNaP!" says the bartender.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium? He just couldn't put it down!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They're cheaper than day rates!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A neutron walks into a club. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender gives him a smile and says, "For you, no charge."
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
The optimist sees the glass half full. The pessimist sees the glass half empty, but how does the chemist see it? Completely full, half with liquid and half with air.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why does a hamburger have less energy than steak? Because it's in the ground state!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder? "You may have graduated, but I've got many degrees."
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why was the mole of nitrogen molecules excited when he left the singles bar? Because he got Avogadro's number!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Two atoms are walking down the street. One atom says to the other, "Hey! I think I lost an electron!" The other asks, "Are you sure?" "Yes, I'm positive!"
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why should you go drinking with neutrons? Because wherever they go, there's no charge!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What's a chemistry teachers favorite thing to teach about? Ammonia, because it's pretty basic stuff.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What happens when you lower your body temperature to -273°C? Nothing, you're perfectly 0K!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why are chemists great for solving problems? Because they always have a solution!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
How did the hipster chemist burn his hand on the beaker? He picked it up before it was cool.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I want to write some jokes about the periodic table… But I don't think I'll be in my element.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What was Avogadro's favorite sport? Golf! He always got a mole-in-one!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If you're not part of the solution…you're part of the precipitate.
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