Page 26 of 97

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 10:30 pm
by Anjum Farook 2O
What do you do with a sick chemist?

First you try and helium, then try and curium, but it that doesn’t work, you barium

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 10:31 pm
by Laila Stedman 3G
Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."
Helium doesn't react.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 10:38 pm
by Huongly Do 3D
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

A one molar solution.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 10:39 pm
by Marie_Rhoads_2C
My friend was reading a book about anti-gravity...He said it's impossible to put down!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 10:40 pm
by JessenyaReyes_1B
joke below :)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 10:40 pm
by Priscilla_Molina_3J
I wish to apologize for not having more chemistry jokes, but I only add them periodically.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 10:42 pm
by Brian_Mena_1J
Enjoy

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 10:43 pm
by Mirian_Garcia_2G
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 10:43 pm
by Priscilla_Molina_3J
You must be a compound of barium and beryllium because you're a total BaBe ;)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 10:44 pm
by Ian Brown 1K
Why did the white bear dissolve in water?

Because it was polar!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 10:45 pm
by Jason_Hong_2J
Why did the noble gas cry?

Because all of his friends Argon.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 10:46 pm
by Michael Sparks 2F
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

A one molar solution

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 10:50 pm
by Alexxa_Vasquez_3B
:)

Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 10:54 pm
by Novelpreet_Boparai1N
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 11:09 pm
by Isaiah Sandoval 1D
Anode has no friends. You might be asking why? If you ask them, they'll saying he's too salty for their taste.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 11:12 pm
by Katherine_Ly_1H
Organic chemistry is difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 11:20 pm
by Jerry_Dar_3C
Have you ever heard that one about the chemist who was reading a book about helium and just couldn't put it down?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 11:23 pm
by z_hernandez_loza_3J
.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 11:30 pm
by Ethan_Wilson_1E
Two atoms are walking down the street. One atom says to the other, “Hey! I think I lost an electron!”

The other says, “Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m positive!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 11:31 pm
by Celine_Ngo_3L
2a0afbc7a92ebd64b160fd3c28b9b923.jpg
(or sunday)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 11:33 pm
by Faizal_Mamani_1F
What's wrong with a joke involving Cobalt, Radon, and Ytterium?


...its CoRn Y

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 11:34 pm
by Billy Ngoy 2I
Q: Why are chemists great for solving problems?

A: They have all the solutions.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 11:34 pm
by Britney Pheng 1L
jacohaasbroek_3.jpg

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 11:37 pm
by Sunny Chera 1N
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

A one molar solution!

Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 11:39 pm
by Melissa Ledesma 2B
!!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 11:42 pm
by Ann Zhang_1M
Don't trust atoms, they make up everything.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 11:47 pm
by Makenna Vulgas 1G
Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na......

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 11:52 pm
by Kareem
“What is the difference between thermodynamics and a stick?

Answer: “A stick has two ends and no beginning. Thermodynamics has two ‘beginnings’ (the first and second law) and no end.”

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 11:57 pm
by Thomas_Elizabeth_3A
Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 11:59 pm
by Srishti_Dhawan_2I
Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
He just couldn't put it down.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 12:16 am
by Linh Ngau 1F
This is me.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 12:26 am
by Samya Konda 2I
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."

Organic chemistry is difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 12:57 am
by Andrew Nguyen 3O
Q. What is a cation afraid of?


A. A dogion

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 1:03 am
by alliedavis
16402547_1880753652202347_3291582920102489661_o.jpg

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 1:07 am
by paulapedrani
“What is the difference between thermodynamics and a stick?

“A stick has two ends and no beginning. Thermodynamics has two ‘beginnings’ (the first and second law) and no end.”

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 1:11 am
by Sascha_Clark_4I
Q:Hey what's nu?
A: C/λ

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 1:12 am
by Libbyfidel_1E
I once told a chem joke, there was no reaction.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 1:16 am
by Jagmeet_Arora_1G
Q: Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero?

A: he's 0k now ;)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 3:07 am
by Angela_Pu_3C
Chemjoke.png

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 7:07 am
by Jaz_Y_1H
What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium? Hehe

A chemist was reading a book on helium. He couldn’t put it down.

Old chemists never die, they just stop reacting.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 7:10 am
by Theresa_Trieu_2G
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 7:55 am
by Paul Sedaros 1B
Q: What do you get when you mix barium, cobalt, and nitrogen?
A: BaCoN

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 10:07 am
by Jasmine_Wong_2K
Why did the bear dissolve in water?
It was polar.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 10:13 am
by Jessica Huang 1M
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 10:18 am
by maria_tamondong_1L
Q: Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?
A: He got Avogadro's number!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 10:22 am
by Mackenzie_Lowenstein_2N
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 10:23 am
by Mackenzie_Lowenstein_2N
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 10:24 am
by Mackenzie_Lowenstein_2N
Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He's 0K now.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 10:25 am
by Mackenzie_Lowenstein_2N
If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 10:25 am
by Mackenzie_Lowenstein_2N
The name's Bond. Ionic Bond. Taken, not shared.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 11:18 am
by Mimi_Giang_1F
Why did the noble gas cry?
Because all his friends argon.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 11:24 am
by Katie_Ho_1M
What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 11:43 am
by Kristen_Power_1C
I have many chemistry jokes.
I'm just afraid they won't get a good reaction!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 11:45 am
by Neha Nibber 3H
Did you hear Oxygen and Potassium went on a date?
It went OK!

Not even a week later, Oxygen and Magnesium went out!
OMg

Oxygen then tried to ask Nitrogen out...
She said NO!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 11:52 am
by Hanan_Kashkoul_1O
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 12:42 pm
by Nathan Mallipeddi 2H
Q: Anyone know any jokes about sodium?
A: Na

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 12:42 pm
by Nathan Mallipeddi 2H
Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 12:57 pm
by JoAnna Yortiss 2G
How often do I like jokes about chemistry?

Periodically.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 1:11 pm
by Sharlene Reyes 2N
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 1:21 pm
by Jonathan_Hu_2C
(Chem Joke)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 1:37 pm
by Jessie_Chen_2L
large.jpg

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 1:45 pm
by Teresa_Duarte_3K
Q: What animal is made up of calcium, nickel and neon?
A: A CaNiNe

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 2:53 pm
by Samart_Condon_1D
Every dipole has its moment.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 2:55 pm
by Timothy_Hyun_2K
Don't trust an atom.

They make up everything.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 3:00 pm
by Ikechukwu Ofoegbu 3D
Q: What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A: A ferrous wheel.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 3:08 pm
by Zaamin Khwaja 3D
Did you know that you can freeze yourself to -273.15 degrees Celsius and still be 0K

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 3:42 pm
by saminah_adam
Graduated Cylinder Joke

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 4:03 pm
by Sonia_Lele_2K
A chemistry lab is like a big party. Some drop acid, others drop the base.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 4:06 pm
by Jane Sin 3A
The optimist sees the glass half full. The pessimist sees the glass half empty. The chemist sees the glass completely full, half with liquid and half with air.

Q: What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?
A: Polar Bond.

My favorite-
Q: What element is a girl's future best friend?
A: Carbon.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 4:25 pm
by Cindy Ngo 1E
Teacher: Chemistry test tomorrow!
Me: How about Nitric Oxide (NO)..

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 5:05 pm
by AlexandraOsterland_3E
Since Valentine's Day is coming up:)
I wish I was an ion so I could form an exothermic bond with you.
If you were C6, and I were H12, all we would need is the air we breathe to be sweeter than sugar.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 6:50 pm
by msrivastava_
Q: What do you get when you mix sulfur, tungsten, and silver?
A: SWAG

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 7:02 pm
by SarahTian3k
Why do chemists learn about ammonia first?
It's pretty basic stuff.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 7:07 pm
by Jessica De Anda 2C
A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you," The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 7:49 pm
by Chaoyi_He_3H
What is the formula for water?
H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O
H to O.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 7:51 pm
by Tyler_Vellozzi_3E
What do you call an acid with a bad attitude? A mean oh acid

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 7:58 pm
by Nick_Ida 1D
What do you get when you cross two hydrogen buffalo and a oxygen buffalo?
-A water buffalo

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:38 pm
by Odel Zadeh_2C
Two atoms are walking down the street.
Says one atom to the other, "Hey! I think I lost an electron!"
The other says, "Are you sure??"
"Yes, I'm positive!"

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:42 pm
by Rachelle_Stark_3H
3.14% of sailors are Pi rates

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:56 pm
by Ashley T 2H
The guy next to me asked me if I had any Hypo Bromide; he said NaBrO.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 8:57 pm
by yubin moon 3c
.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 9:17 pm
by Evan Gentry 2E
Why did the bear dissolve in water?
It was a Polar bear!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 10:36 pm
by 204639491
If a king farts...

Is it a Noble Gas?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 12:50 am
by Mirian_Garcia_2G
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 9:24 am
by Ting Zheng 3L
What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 10:25 am
by Jaz_Y_1H
I found the large hot dog from the electrochem demo!
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 11:22 am
by Philline_Tumbaga_1F
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 12:24 pm
by Jaspreet_Nagra_2I
Q:
What kind of fish is made up of only 2 sodium atoms?
A:
2Na

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 12:31 pm
by Chris Liddicoat
Two chemists go into a bar. The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O." The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" — and he died.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 2:17 pm
by Ivy Kwok 2I
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 2:22 pm
by Amber_Candelaria_1D
image2.JPG

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 4:43 pm
by Kiana_Shibata_2G
What is the most important thing to learn in chemistry? To never lick the spoon!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 4:43 pm
by heather_carlton_1K
What did the copper anode say to the aluminum cathode, prior to electroplating?
Al Cu later

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 6:04 pm
by Josh_Zhong_1F
GOT MOLE PROBLEMS?
CALL AVOGADRO AT 602-1023

LOLOLOLOLLLLLLLLLL,

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 6:30 pm
by Mirian_Garcia_2G
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 7:31 pm
by Omeed_Partovi_1L
Why did the liquid smell so good?

-Because it didn't pass gas.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 7:45 pm
by Iris Feng 2I
How do you make 24-molar solution?

Put artificial teeth in water.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 7:53 pm
by Shushanna S 3F
I'm so salty, you could you could make a battery out of me.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 9:14 pm
by Cecile Riviere-Cazaux 2A
16427721_10155357426331840_312328351827378992_n.jpg

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2017 9:35 pm
by Hannah Liu 2A
Q: What do you call Iron blowing in the wind?
A: Febreze!