Page 42 of 76

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 11, 2017 9:41 pm
by StevenBieneman_3K
1,2-dimethylcyclopropane?

I should wear that to the beach...

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 11, 2017 9:52 pm
by Sunny Chera 1N
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 11, 2017 10:05 pm
by Samantha_Leong_3K
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 11, 2017 10:19 pm
by Neha Nibber 3H
Two chemists go into a bar. The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O." The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" — and he died.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 11, 2017 11:20 pm
by David Julfayan 1F
images.png
images.png (9.61 KiB) Viewed 5789 times

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 11, 2017 11:23 pm
by Jonathan Marin Dis3A
Did you know you could cool yourself to -273.15°C and still be 0K???

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 11, 2017 11:46 pm
by Winnie Liu 1M
I told a bad joke about Helium one day, but nobody was reactive.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 11, 2017 11:49 pm
by Brian_Mena_1J
Oh ok

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 11, 2017 11:56 pm
by Keitty_Calderon_1C
A sign outside the chemistry hotel reads "Great Day Rates, Even Better NO3-'s"

A group of organic molecules were having a party, when a group of robbers broke into the room and stole all of the guest's joules. A tall, strong man, armed with a machine gun came into the room and killed the robbers one by one. The guests were very grateful to this man, and they wanted to know who he was. He replied: My name is BOND, Covalent Bond.

Heisenberg is out for a drive when he's stopped by a traffic cop. The cop says: " Do you know how fast you were going? Heisenberg replies: "No, but I know where I am".

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 12:23 am
by Andrew Nguyen 3O
Q. What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

A. Polar Bond

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 12:37 am
by Srishti_Dhawan_2I
I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite…
He said NaBrO

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 12:41 am
by ibukunolabinjo_3J
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 12:46 am
by Tycho_Meimban_2B
a-chemistry-lab-is-like-a-big-party-t-shirts-men-s-premium-t-shirt.jpg


It's true. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 1:22 am
by Sophie_Ahmad_2F
Anybody know any jokes about sodium?

Na

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 3:01 am
by helen_bui_2G
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
A one molar solution.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 3:03 am
by helen_bui_2G
According to a chemist, why is the world so diverse?
Because it's made up of alkynes of people

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 3:14 am
by Zhiyong Xie 3K
If H2O is water, what is H2O4?
Drinking, bathing, washing and swimming

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 11:19 am
by divya_devineni_2E
Think like a proton and stay positive!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 11:28 am
by Jingyuan_Fu_3E
Q: What did thermometer say to the graduated cylinder?
A: "You may have graduated but I've got numerous degrees"

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 12:11 pm
by Mikaela Gareeb 3G
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.

What's "HIJKLMNO"?
H2O

Why does a hamburger have lower energy than a steak?
It's in the ground state

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 12:23 pm
by Melissa Ledesma 2B
:)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 12:54 pm
by caitlin_oberman_2G
O chemistry you make me laugh

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 1:07 pm
by Samya Konda 2I
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."

If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 1:11 pm
by Amanda_Ye_1G
Breaking Bad :)

Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 1:11 pm
by JulieLy_3C
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 1:29 pm
by Aaron_Trell_2J
Q: Want to hear a joke about sodium hypobromite?
A: NaBrO

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 1:51 pm
by Katherine Sung 2I
What did Na and Ne say after hearing a chemistry joke?

That was sodium funny! I slapped my neon that one!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 2:25 pm
by Jackyboy 1C
Baby, I know chemistry and you've got one significant figure

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 2:28 pm
by Kirsten Bermudo 1O
You can freeze yourself at -273°C and still be 0K

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 2:39 pm
by Nadine_El Fawal_3M
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 2:43 pm
by Thomas Morgan 1B
If your'e not part of the solution you're part of the participate.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 2:43 pm
by Cris Yuan 2I
Here's a fun one about hydrocarbons:
putan-puten-putin-chemical-bond-formula.jpg

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 3:14 pm
by Anisha Patel 1G
wow

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 3:17 pm
by PriscillaMariscal_3F
What do you call an acid with an attitude?

A-mean-oh acid

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 3:32 pm
by Simran Brar 1J
[img]
cation.jpg
[/img]

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 3:50 pm
by Sahand Fardi 1
Organic Chemistry is difficult.... Those who study it will have alkynes of trouble.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 3:52 pm
by Sahand Fardi 1
Q: Did you hear about the guy who got cooled to absolute zero?


A: He's oK now.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 3:53 pm
by Sahand Fardi 1
If the Silver Surfer and Ironman team up, they'd be alloys

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 3:54 pm
by Sahand Fardi 1
I had to make these bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 3:57 pm
by Sahand Fardi 1
Chemists.....

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 3:58 pm
by Sahand Fardi 1
After the final

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 4:00 pm
by Sahand Fardi 1
2 types

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 4:17 pm
by Deanna_Nguyen_3L
Q: According to a chemist, why is the world so diverse?
A: Because it's made up of alkynes of people.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 4:34 pm
by 004599434
Outside his buckyball home, one molecule overheard another molecule saying, "I'm positive that a free electron once stripped me of an electron after he lepton me. You gotta keep your ion them."

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 4:58 pm
by MaddyMoore3A
Hahaha!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 5:08 pm
by Marissa Stinnett 1E
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 5:10 pm
by Tyler_Vellozzi_3E
Why did the hipster chemist get burnt? Because he touched the beaker before it was cool.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 5:11 pm
by Andrew Zhong 2H
64966476.jpg

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 5:14 pm
by Isaiah Sandoval 1D
The sun and moon must be jealous of other models because they have eclipsed conformations less often that other models.
(Instead of the normal 120 degrees they need to wait the full 360 degrees.)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 5:17 pm
by Serena Patel 2H
What kind of phone did Oxygen buy Sulfur for his birthday?

A Sulfone

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 5:33 pm
by Yen Vuong 2I
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 5:37 pm
by Alex Phu 2c
Q: Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

A: It went OK.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 5:43 pm
by Taravat_Lakzian_1C
Q: Why did the noble gas cry?
A: Because all his friends Argon

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 5:47 pm
by Marisa_Woo_2G
If a bear in Yosemite and a bear in Alaska both fall into the water, which one dissolves faster?

The one in Alaska, because it's polar. :)

~~~~
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate. :)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 6:14 pm
by Michelle Lin 3M
Why did the hipster chemist get burnt?

Because he touched the beaker before it was cool.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 6:15 pm
by KoSiOg
Do you have mole problems?
If so, call Avogrado at 602-1023

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 6:16 pm
by KoSiOg
When you know Chemistry Jokes

But they all Boron

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 6:17 pm
by KoSiOg
Gold walks into a bar. The bartender shouts "Ay you! Get out of here!"

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 6:29 pm
by Anya_Alag_3J
How many physical chemists does it take to wash a beaker? None. That's what organic chemists are for!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 6:41 pm
by Alexma 3A
Organic chemistry is difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 6:45 pm
by Alexma 3A

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 6:46 pm
by Wesley_Rugen_1E
Organic chemistry is really difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 6:48 pm
by Alexma 3A

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 6:49 pm
by Alexma 3A

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 6:49 pm
by Alexma 3A

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 6:56 pm
by Quynh Nguyen 2H
Q: What element is derived from a Norse [censored]?
A: Thorium.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 7:15 pm
by Aleena_Sorf_2A
Q: What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
A: HeHe

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 7:18 pm
by Jessica_Nakahira_1G
Since the final is in a week....
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 7:22 pm
by Ikechukwu Ofoegbu 3D
Q: Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?
A: Because it's in the ground state.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 7:23 pm
by Swati_Sharma_2D
What is the molecule CH2O called? Seawater!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 7:36 pm
by jillianduffield_2D
Organic chemistry is hard. People who study it have alkynes of trouble.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 7:49 pm
by AlexSun2L
What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
“HeHe”

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 7:51 pm
by Irene Davila Mejia 1I
True story

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 8:07 pm
by Raj Susarla 3I
The Chemistry Cat doesn't have 9 lives, but instead has 18 half-lives (he's radioactive!).

This one really cracked me up!!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 8:10 pm
by Sarah Sackey_3G
.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 8:15 pm
by Kimberly_Hoh_2A
What animal is made of calcium, nickel, and neon?

A CaNiNe! :D

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 8:16 pm
by Timothy Yu 2M
What do you do with a sick chemist?

If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 8:27 pm
by Kelly Ortega 1K
Q: What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A: A ferrous wheel:
Fe - Fe
/ \
Fe Fe
\ /
Fe - Fe

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 8:28 pm
by Ting Zheng 3L
How do you tell the difference between a chemist and a train driver?

Ask them to pronounce "unionized."

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 8:37 pm
by Jagmeet_Arora_1G
If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they’d be alloys.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 8:39 pm
by Evan Gentry 2E
Anyone know any jokes about Sodium?
Na

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 8:49 pm
by gohar_mkrtchyan_2J
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 9:08 pm
by Paola_RubioRod_1F
Chem Joke.jpg

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 9:18 pm
by Noelle Min-1N
ae0c933794f4809d88a4b734e554d86d.jpg

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 9:27 pm
by melissapasao1B
Why do aromatics belong in the nuthouse?

Because they’re all CYCLO.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 9:30 pm
by wesley hardin
"Chemists, man."

"What's wrong with chemists?"

"Well, you just have to keep an ION them."

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 9:36 pm
by Kristen_Power_1C
A chemist walks into the bar asking for concentrated sodium hydroxide.
The bartender asks, "Why the long base?"

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 9:47 pm
by Yeon Hee Park 3M
alright

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 9:50 pm
by Emily_Vilshtein_3B
Screen Shot 2017-03-12 at 9.49.28 PM.png

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 9:52 pm
by Katherine_Ly_1H
Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 10:03 pm
by KimberlySalinas_2A
Why do chemists like nitrates so much? Because they're cheaper than day rates

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 10:14 pm
by Chem_Mod
Jessica_Nakahira_1G wrote:Since the final is in a week....
Image


I hope not! :-)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 10:17 pm
by ERIKTORRESDisc3C
batorgo.jpg

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 10:19 pm
by Jared Gao 3G
What do you get when you cut an avocado into 6x10^23 pieces?
Guacamole.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 10:21 pm
by AndyL3I
What is a chemist's favorite kind of tree?

A chemistree

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 10:25 pm
by Jaz_Y_1H
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 10:33 pm
by KylaTenido1G
Every dipole has its moment!

Why did the employer force his employees to walk between high-voltage plates before entering the work place???

--Because he didn't want any unionized workers!!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 10:34 pm
by katherine_r
Since it's beach season in California!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 10:35 pm
by Avery_E
periodic table jokes

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 12, 2017 10:36 pm
by katherine_r
Love is in the air