Page 57 of 76

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2018 10:29 pm
by Karissa Newberry
Why do white bears dissolve in water? Because they’re polar.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2018 10:31 pm
by 504754253
Hey professor, how often do you like jokes about elements? Periodically or...?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2018 10:31 pm
by Karissa Newberry
What did one titration tell the other? Let’s meet at the endpoint.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2018 10:32 pm
by 504754253
I heard oxygen and magnesium were going out and I was like, O Mg

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2018 10:32 pm
by 504754253
all these chemistry jokes are sodium funny lol

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2018 11:11 pm
by SantanaRodriguezDis1G
What did one ion say to the other?
I got my ion you

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2018 11:15 pm
by Hyein Cha 2I
Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."
The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" - and he died.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2018 11:15 pm
by Liam Maxwell 2E
Why was the electrochemical cell arrested?

Because he was convicted of battery.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2018 11:18 pm
by Liam Maxwell 2E
Two men walk into a restaurant. The First man orders, "I'd like H2O". The second man orders, "I'd like H2O too". The second man died.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2018 11:57 pm
by Sarah Wax 1G
Q: What did one ion say to the other?
A: I've got my ion you.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2018 11:58 pm
by Sarah Wax 1G
Q: What do you call a clown who's in jail?
A: A silicon.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2018 11:58 pm
by Sarah Wax 1G
Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 19, 2018 7:21 pm
by hojae_lee_1C
Q: Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
A: It went OK.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 19, 2018 7:21 pm
by hojae_lee_1C
The optimist sees the glass half full. The pessimist sees the glass half empty. The chemist sees the glass completely full, half with liquid and half with air.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 19, 2018 7:22 pm
by hojae_lee_1C
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 20, 2018 4:16 pm
by Anne 2L
throwback to simpler times
[img]<iframe%20src="https://www.facebook.com/plugins/post.php?href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2Felitechatchemistrymemes%2Fphotos%2Fa.1807758922782274.1073741827.1807744196117080%2F2026968870861277%2F%3Ftype%3D3&width=500"%20width="500"%20height="530"%20style="border:none;overflow:hidden"%20scrolling="no"%20frameborder="0"%20allowTransparency="true"></iframe>[/img]

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 20, 2018 11:52 pm
by Josh Moy 1H
dont trust an atom. Why? they make up everything

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2018 12:10 pm
by cbercik
I asked a guy next to me if he had any sodium hypobromite.
He said NaBrO

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2018 12:12 pm
by cbercik
What does the leader of the electron army say before battle?
CHAARGE!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2018 12:13 pm
by cbercik
Look at her, she must have 11 protons..
because she's sodium fine

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2018 12:14 pm
by cbercik
A chemistry lab can be a huge party...
Some drop acid, and others drop the base

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2018 12:15 pm
by cbercik
Señor, is Silicon spelled the same way in Spanish?

"Si"

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2018 12:16 pm
by cbercik
The hipster chemist burned himself because he put his hand on the beaker before it was cool

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2018 1:02 pm
by Karen Zheng_2H
hopefully not this quarter

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2018 1:02 pm
by Karen Zheng_2H
.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2018 1:22 pm
by Carl Kim 1K
Q: What do you call a scientific plant? A: Chemis-tree.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2018 1:22 pm
by Carl Kim 1K
Q: What do you do with a dead chemist? A: Barium

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Feb 21, 2018 1:22 pm
by Carl Kim 1K
Q: What did the chemist say when he found two new isotopes of Helium? A: HeHe.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 22, 2018 12:53 am
by Jennifer Ho 1K
Mole Problems?
Don't Worry! Just Call 602-1023!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Feb 23, 2018 3:36 pm
by Sam Smoot 2L
What do you get when you mix sulfur, tungsten, and silver?

SWAG

(Sorry)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Feb 23, 2018 3:39 pm
by Sam Smoot 2L
Know any jokes about sodium?

Na.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Feb 23, 2018 3:42 pm
by Sam Smoot 2L
How did the college student define hydrophobic on their chemistry exam?

Fear of utility bills.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Feb 23, 2018 11:55 pm
by Seth So
Old chemists never die, they just stop reacting.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Feb 23, 2018 11:57 pm
by Seth So
what is "HIJKLMNO"?

H20

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Feb 23, 2018 11:58 pm
by Seth So
What do you call CH20?

Seawater

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 24, 2018 12:10 am
by Meghna2A
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 24, 2018 11:37 am
by Abdullah2I
I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite…
He said NaBrO

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 24, 2018 2:01 pm
by Krupa Prajapati
Forget Hydrogen, you're my number one element

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 24, 2018 2:03 pm
by Krupa Prajapati
Hey baby, I've got my ion you!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 24, 2018 2:04 pm
by Krupa Prajapati
I wish I was adenine so I could get paired with U

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 24, 2018 6:49 pm
by Jesus Rodriguez 1J
Q: What element is a girl's future best friend?
A: Carbon.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 24, 2018 11:27 pm
by Sohini Halder 1G
Are you sharing your electrons with me because I feel a real deep bond with you.

Re: Post chem jokes here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 12:06 am
by Kevin Tabibian 1A
Iron you glad I didn't say copper?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 11:44 am
by Isa Samad 1L
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 11:44 am
by Isa Samad 1L
Q: What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?
A: CSI

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 1:46 pm
by hojae_lee_1C
Q: Why did the noble gas cry?
A: Because all his friends Argon

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 1:49 pm
by hojae_lee_1C
Q: Why did Carbon marry Hydrogen?
A: They bonded well from the minute they met

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 1:49 pm
by hojae_lee_1C
Q: What do you call Iron blowing in the wind?
A: Fe-breeze

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 3:36 pm
by ssthirkannad
What did the man make for his enemy?
A Pb & J sandwich

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 3:40 pm
by ssthirkannad
Someone told me I have chemistry with a cute guy
But I don't have chemistry until next quarter

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 3:41 pm
by ssthirkannad
What's the most important part of any relationship?
Organic chemistry

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 3:42 pm
by ssthirkannad
If a king farts is it a noble gas?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 3:44 pm
by ssthirkannad
Do you have 11 protons?
Because you're sodium fine

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 3:46 pm
by ssthirkannad
Why do hamburgers yield lower energy than steak?
Because they're in the ground state

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 3:48 pm
by ssthirkannad
Who revolutionized chemistry?
Free radicals

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 3:48 pm
by ssthirkannad
What do dipoles say in passing?
Hey, have you got a moment?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 3:51 pm
by ssthirkannad
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
A one molar solution

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 3:55 pm
by ssthirkannad
What did one titration say to the other?
Let's meet at the endpoint

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 3:56 pm
by ssthirkannad
What do you call a clown in jail?
A silicon

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 3:57 pm
by ssthirkannad
I wish I had more chemistry jokes but I can only come up with them periodically

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 4:17 pm
by Jennie Fox 1D
I don't trust atoms....

I heard they make up everything

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 4:22 pm
by Suchita 2I
chem meme.jpeg

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 4:59 pm
by Anna Li 2E
A neutron walked into a bar and asked how much for a drink. The bartender replied, "for you, no charge."

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 6:52 pm
by Liz White 1K
I would tell another chemistry joke, but it appears that all the good ones Argon.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 6:57 pm
by Katie Blann 1E
A photon checks into hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He replies, "No, I'm traveling light"

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 6:58 pm
by ChristineJimenez1J
What happens to nitrogen as the sun rises?
It becomes daytrogen!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 6:59 pm
by ChristineJimenez1J
What do you call Iron blowing in the wind?

Febreeze

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 6:59 pm
by ChristineJimenez1J
What is a cation afraid of?

A dogion

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 7:00 pm
by ChristineJimenez1J
Why is the pH of Youtube so stable?


Because it constantly buffers.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 7:01 pm
by ChristineJimenez1J
Q: Sulfur and Oxygen are best friends, but they lived far from each other. How did oxygen chat with his friend?

A: He used his Sulfone

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 7:02 pm
by ChristineJimenez1J
Why did the acid go to the gym?

To become a buffer solution.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 7:03 pm
by ChristineJimenez1J
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 7:04 pm
by ChristineJimenez1J
What kind of fish is made of only two sodium atoms?

2 Na

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 7:05 pm
by ChristineJimenez1J
You can't trust atoms, gotta keep an ion them.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 7:06 pm
by ChristineJimenez1J
What is the scariest element on the periodic table?

Ah, the element of surprise.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 7:20 pm
by Annalise Eder 2L
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 7:29 pm
by Jennifer Ho 1K
What do you call a ring of Fe+2 ions?

A ferrous wheel

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 8:08 pm
by Julia Ward 2C
Q: Why does hamburger have lower energy than steak?
A: Because it's in the ground state.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 8:29 pm
by Karissa Newberry
What do you call a scientific plant? A: Chemis-tree.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 8:32 pm
by Karissa Newberry
What element is derived from a Norse [censored]? A: Thorium.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 8:32 pm
by Karissa Newberry
How can you spot a chemist in the restroom? They wash their hands before they go.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 9:16 pm
by Nishma Chakraborty 1J
Why did the bear dissolve in water?

-because it was a polar bear

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 9:21 pm
by Marina Georgies 1C
Did you hear about the galvanic cell that went to court?

He got charged with a salt and battery!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 9:23 pm
by Marina Georgies 1C
If I had a choice between DNA and RNA, I'd choose RNA because it has U in it.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 9:26 pm
by Marina Georgies 1C
how to tell the difference between a plumber and a chemist: ask them to pronounce the word "unionized"

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 10:04 pm
by Bill Phawn 2C
Hey do you like chemistry? Because I've got my ion you.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 10:57 pm
by Naomi Jennings 2H
I'm planning to go into a freezing chamber at -273.15 degrees C. My friends were worried but I told them I'd be 0K

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 11:07 pm
by Richard Braun 1I
Don't trust atoms, they make up everything.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 11:08 pm
by Richard Braun 1I
What is the chemical formula for coffee?
CoFe2

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 11:10 pm
by Richard Braun 1I
What is the chemical formula for banana?
BaNa2

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 25, 2018 11:29 pm
by Jason Muljadi 2C
IMG_0685.JPG

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 26, 2018 1:32 am
by Phillip Tran
How do Sulfur and Oxygen communicate?

a sulfone

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 26, 2018 1:33 am
by Phillip Tran
Why did the acid go to the gym?

To become a buffer solution!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 26, 2018 1:39 am
by Phillip Tran
What is it called when Queen of England farts?

A noble gas

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 26, 2018 3:12 am
by Daniel Vo 1B
What's the chemical formula for a banana?
BaNa_2

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 26, 2018 3:12 am
by Daniel Vo 1B
You wanna hear a joke about Sodium?
Na.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 26, 2018 3:13 am
by Daniel Vo 1B
If Avogadro calls, tell him to leave his number.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 26, 2018 11:50 am
by Arjun Sharma 1D
What did one charged ions say to the other?

I got my ion you ;)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 26, 2018 11:51 am
by Arjun Sharma 1D
There was once a man who was frozen to absolute 0...
He’s 0K now

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 26, 2018 1:43 pm
by Shreya Ramineni 2L
Q: What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of helium?
A: HeHe