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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2016 6:04 pm
by Joanne_Park_4C
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BATMAAANNNNN

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2016 6:26 pm
by Antonio_Zenteno_4E
What's the most boring element on the periodic table?

a BORon

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2016 7:20 pm
by Madeline Fox 2B
chemistry joke.jpg
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chemistry joke.jpg
chemistry joke.jpg (10.42 KiB) Viewed 8328 times
chemistry joke.jpg
chemistry joke.jpg (10.42 KiB) Viewed 8328 times
chemistry joke.jpg
chemistry joke.jpg (10.42 KiB) Viewed 8328 times

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2016 7:42 pm
by swatiperepa
Where does the German chemistry teacher put the used batteries of an electrolytic experiment?


In the zinc. :)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2016 7:47 pm
by Rishi_Kayathi_1E
You're Berryllium Gold Titanium Flourine Uranium Lithium (Be Au Ti F U Li) dressed.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2016 8:23 pm
by Toby Lin 1J
I need this T-shirt...

Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2016 8:31 pm
by Flamingos 3L
Here ya go!

An organic chemist, an analytical chemist, and a physical chemist are asked if a certain horse will win the race. The organic chemist asks what the horse has been eating and drugs given to it. The analytical chemist asks for the makeup of the track and mud. The physical chemist starts with "If we assume that the horse is a sphere..."

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2016 8:38 pm
by 904605949
B4w0xqbCYAElGrQ.jpg

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2016 8:45 pm
by Aneri Chouhan
Q: What did Drake say to Rihanna?
A: I've got my ion you

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2016 9:12 pm
by Ashley Bertholf 1E
Don't trust atoms... They make up everything!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2016 9:37 pm
by Nathan Mallipeddi 2H
What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2016 9:47 pm
by Tamara_Torosyan_1J
Q: How many moles are in a guacamole?
A: Avocado's number

Q: What weapon can you make from the elements potassium, nickel, and iron?
A: A KNiFe

Q: Hey is silicon the same in Spanish?
A: Si

It's good to keep a positive attitude and not have an electron cloud hanging over your head.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Oct 21, 2016 10:07 pm
by K Phelan 3D
Q: What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?
A: CoFe2
Q: What is the chemical formula for "banana"?
A: BaNa2

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2016 12:00 am
by Sonia_Lele_2K
What kind of sandwich is made of 2 sodium atoms?
2 Na salad

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2016 12:07 am
by Anisha Patel 1G
I tell bad chemistry jokes periodically.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2016 1:28 am
by Ivy Kwok 2I
Q: What's the significance of "NaCl/NaOH" in the context of video games?
A: Your base is under a salt (assault)!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2016 8:51 am
by Kimberly_Hoh_2A
Q: What do you get when you combine sulfur, tungsten, and silver?
A: SWAG

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2016 10:05 am
by 804748473
I have many chemistry jokes ... I'm just afraid they won't get a good reaction

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2016 1:14 pm
by sboutros2B
What do you do with a dead chemist?
-Barium

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2016 7:16 pm
by Balint Nagy 3C
What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?
He was booked for a salt and battery.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2016 7:31 pm
by AngelicaAquino_2I
Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
He just couldn't put it down.

I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite…
He said NaBrO (little throwback to quiz 1)

Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2016 8:04 pm
by lena1217
Q: What do you call Iron blowing in the wind?
A: Febreeze

Q: Why can atoms not be trusted?
A: Because they make up everything!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2016 8:37 pm
by Justin_Bueno_2O
Chemistry

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2016 9:11 pm
by Amy_Dixon_1I
If I don't have enough acid in my system, I can be pretty basic.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2016 9:23 pm
by Priscilla_Covarrubias_HL
Q: Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?
A: He got Avogadro's number!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2016 9:40 pm
by Victoria Vu 3L
What's the difference between cooking and chemistry? In chemistry you cant lick the spoon.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2016 9:42 pm
by Samantha_Leong_3K
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2016 10:31 pm
by F Rios 3E
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Oct 22, 2016 10:44 pm
by Emma Dawson 1H
Heisenberg and Schrodinger are driving down the road when a cop pulls them over. The cop asks Heisenberg "Do you know how fast you were going back there?" Heisenberg replies "No, but I can tell you exactly where I was." The cop begins to be suspicious and proceeds to search the car.
Upon opening the trunk he exclaims "Hey, you have a dead cat back here." to which Schrodinger replies "Well now I do! Thanks."

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 12:51 am
by emmajanibekyan_4I
How easy is chemistry? Easy px, py, pz!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 10:41 am
by sheilaho_1E
Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 11:36 am
by Paul Ndawula 1D
Did you hear about the guy who's temperature got down to absolute zero?....

Don't worry, he's 0 K.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 2:03 pm
by Arianna Brooks 4A
What is the chemical formula for banana?
BaNa2

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 2:45 pm
by Ann Zhang_1M
Q: What do you call a clown who's in jail?
A: A silicon.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 2:46 pm
by Ariana Murillo 2O
Thank you for all the jokes. Great way to take a break from studying for chem! Keep it up! :)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 3:14 pm
by Haoqing Li 3E
Q: What do you get when you mix sulfur, tungsten, and silver?

A: SWAG

Lol

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 3:41 pm
by Ting Zheng 3L
Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
... It went OK.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 5:01 pm
by Alexander Chen 3N
Chemistry version of Pen Pineapple Apple Pen. So dumb, yet so funny!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqL75fASb6U

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 5:12 pm
by 004599434
What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe :)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 6:10 pm
by Nikki Nguyen 2N
What two elements do sheep belt when happy?
BaH

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 6:17 pm
by Rachelle_Stark_3H
Why are chemists great for solving problems? They have all the solutions.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 6:53 pm
by Andy Chen 3L
Q: Do you want to hear a banana joke?

A: K

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 6:54 pm
by Navi Sidhu 1F
Why did carbon marry hydrogen?
They bonded really well from the moment they met.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 8:41 pm
by AJ Garalza 2E
Hydrogen walks into a bar and has a seat next to Iron(II) Oxide. They strike up a casual conversation about movies. Hydrogen then asks Iron(II) Oxide what's you're favorite movie of all time? That's easy he replies, Ferrous Bueller's Day Off.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 9:07 pm
by Sascha_Clark_4I
Which electrons are the tastiest?

Pi Electrons!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 10:25 pm
by Christopher_Reyes_4I
I'm pretty bad at telling jokes...

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 10:30 pm
by melissagonzalez1c
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 10:40 pm
by Ethan_Kato_1D
Joke 1: Is silicon the same in Spanish?
Answer: Si

Joke 2: I blew up my chemistry experiment...
OXIDANTS HAPPEN

Joke 3: I think I've Lost an Electron... In fact I'm Positive

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 10:48 pm
by Michael_Zhang_1J
I make bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones [Ar] taken.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 10:50 pm
by Julianne Seog 3K
If a King farts.... is it a Noble gas?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 11:01 pm
by Madeline Guajardo 3J
Just sayin'

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 11:12 pm
by Annah Khan 1B
Q: What is the chemical formula for coffee?
A: CoFe2

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 11:42 pm
by ginnyyao1L

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Oct 23, 2016 11:53 pm
by Hannah_Johnson1L
Q: What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
A: HeHe

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2016 12:54 am
by Alexa_Kwang_1D
What did the student who failed chemistry say?
If I had electrons I would have an octet because I don't do chemistry.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2016 10:58 am
by Katelynn Luansing 2B
My date this Friday was kind of like Oxygen and Potassium... it was OK.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2016 11:00 am
by William_Yi_3B
what did the atom say to the other when stealing a electron
Bromine

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2016 12:36 pm
by Chigozie_Nnoruka_1K
What Is A Chemist’s Favorite Plant?.....STOICHIOME-TREE

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2016 12:40 pm
by Theresa_Trieu_2G
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2016 12:45 pm
by Yasmine Choroomi 2C
I heard oxygen and magnesium are going out and i was like OMg!!!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2016 1:07 pm
by Hung_Sabrina_3N
"Tell me a potassium joke!"
"K"

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2016 2:31 pm
by Jessica Huang 1M
Are you made of Fluorine, Iodine, and Neon? 'Cause you are F-I-Ne

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2016 3:40 pm
by Deen Tar
What do you call Iron blowing in the wind?
Febreeze.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2016 3:52 pm
by Tyler_Vellozzi_3E
What's the matter? Everything. Everything is matter.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2016 4:44 pm
by Chaoyi_He_3H
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2016 6:07 pm
by Hanan_Kashkoul_1O
Too cute not to share. :)
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2016 8:38 pm
by Tiffany Wee 2D
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15°C and still be 0k?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2016 10:39 pm
by 804780590
What happens to nitrogen when the sun comes out?
It becomes daytrogen.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2016 10:43 pm
by TramHo2G
A chemistry teacher was berating her students for not learning the Periodic Table of Elements.
She said, "Why when I was your age, I knew both their names and weights."
One kid popped up, "Yeah, but teacher, there were so few of them back then."

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Oct 24, 2016 10:44 pm
by Julia Stinnett 2N
Two atoms are walking down the street.
Says one atom to the other, "Hey! I think I lost an electron!"
The other says, "Are you sure??"
"Yes, I'm positive!"

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2016 12:18 am
by SarahTian3k
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2016 12:21 am
by Alex Phu 2c
Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2016 11:05 am
by Aneri Suthar
A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge"

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2016 12:31 pm
by Caresse_Zhong_2K
Two chemists go into a bar. The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O." The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" — and he died.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2016 4:17 pm
by Gianna Zufall 3G
Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?
To reduce his carbon footprint.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2016 4:23 pm
by Tiffany Jeng 1L
Why are chemists great for solving problems?
They have all the solutions

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2016 4:42 pm
by Ashley T 2H
Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium? It went OK.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2016 5:53 pm
by Ruthie Jia 1L
Two moles per litre...

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2016 7:03 pm
by Ishita_Dubey_2D
Oxygen and Magnesium went out on a date... OMg!!!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2016 7:40 pm
by Mirian_Garcia_2G
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2016 10:22 pm
by Brian Shih 1J
You’d think that atoms bonding with other atoms would mean they’re being friendly, but really they steal each other’s electrons.
How ionic.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Oct 25, 2016 11:56 pm
by rachel_john
lol these jokes are (lit)hium!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 10:30 am
by Jennifer Ngo 1M
Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?





Because it's in the ground state.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 10:42 am
by Claire Vandenberg 4L
Q: What's wrong with a joke involving Cobalt, Radon, and Ytterium?
A: its CoRn Y

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 12:22 pm
by Jane Sin 3A
Outside his buckyball home, one molecule overheard another molecule saying, "I'm positive that a free electron once stripped me of an electron after he lepton me. You gotta keep your ion them!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 12:23 pm
by Emily Steele 4J
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 2:40 pm
by Chin_Alyssa_3I
CATions

An ion with a PAWS-itive charge

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 2:42 pm
by Minh_Le_3I
what-did-the-scientist-say-when-he-found-2-isotopes-of-helium.jpg

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 4:07 pm
by Samart_Condon_1D
Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 4:20 pm
by Megan_McElfish_3D
Do you know any jokes about sodium? Na

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 4:42 pm
by hfrazer1B
Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 5:10 pm
by Ikechukwu Ofoegbu 3D
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0K?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 6:23 pm
by Anika_Desar_3N
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 8:36 pm
by Shelley Pi 1K
Q: Do I know the molecular formula for sodium hydride?
A: NaH.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 8:38 pm
by Shelley Pi 1K
Q: What do dipoles say in passing?
A: Have you got a moment?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 10:32 pm
by Nicholas Appel 1F
How did the sodium atom feel about donating an electron to the chlorine atom?
Salty.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Oct 27, 2016 2:19 am
by Giselle Garcia 1B
Why are protons so hesitant to love each other?

Because their love is explosive!

(Picture coming soon)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Oct 27, 2016 9:04 am
by sheilaho_1E
Organic chemistry is difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Oct 27, 2016 12:43 pm
by Lisbeth Hernandez3L
"I have a solution".
"Pipette down".

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Oct 27, 2016 1:48 pm
by Abbeyj3I
Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
He just couldn't put it down.