Page 71 of 76

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 8:56 pm
by 805169754
Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?
He got Avogadro's number!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 8:59 pm
by 805169754
If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
H2O3

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 9:00 pm
by 805169754
What do you do with a dead chemist?
Barium

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 9:01 pm
by 805169754
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 9:35 pm
by vaishali 1D
What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 9:36 pm
by vaishali 1D
What is the chemical formula for a banana?

BaNa2

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 9:36 pm
by vaishali 1D
What show do cesium and iodine love to watch together?

CsI

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 9:37 pm
by vaishali 1D
Silver walks up to gold in a bar and says, "Au, get outta here!"

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 9:38 pm
by 505095972
What did the cashier say to Gibbs when he bought an energy drink?

"Don't worry about it. It's free.”

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 10:02 pm
by Gisselle Sainz 2F
A HUG without "U" would be toxic

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 10:04 pm
by Gisselle Sainz 2F
...

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 10:05 pm
by Gisselle Sainz 2F
...

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 10:06 pm
by Gisselle Sainz 2F
...

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 10:07 pm
by Gisselle Sainz 2F
.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 11:39 pm
by Natalie Liu 4I
Why do chemistry teachers like to teach about ammonia?
It’s pretty basic stuff.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 11:41 pm
by Natalie Liu 4I
Why did the noble gas cry?
Because all his friends argon.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 17, 2019 11:42 pm
by Natalie Liu 4I
According to a chemist, why is the world so diverse?
Because it's made up of alkynes of people.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2019 12:15 pm
by Tony Ong 3K
Outside his buckyball home, one molecule overheard another molecule saying, "I'm positive that a free electron once stripped me of an electron after he lepton me. You gotta keep your ION them."

hahahhahahhaa

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2019 12:16 pm
by Tony Ong 3K
Q: What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A: A ferrous wheel:
Fe - Fe
/ \
Fe Fe
\ /
Fe - Fe

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 18, 2019 12:16 pm
by Tony Ong 3K
Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A. First you try to helium, then you try to curium, but if this fails then you have to barium.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2019 1:10 am
by diana_calderon_4L
Organic chemistry is difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2019 1:10 am
by diana_calderon_4L
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2019 1:11 am
by diana_calderon_4L
If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 19, 2019 9:28 pm
by Shreya_Bharadwaj_1D
Did you hear Magnesium and Oxygen are a couple now?? OMg!!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 9:09 am
by Hannah Yates 1K
@ the midterm thissss yearrrrrr

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 9:15 am
by Hannah Yates 1K
Hello, while I was procrastinating my studies, I drew Lavelle! Thought I would share this with all of you!! Thanks for being a great professor !

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 10:39 am
by Kassidy Tran 1E
Which element is a girl's best friend?
Carbon (diamond).

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 10:40 am
by Kassidy Tran 1E
Why does a pound of hamburger have less energy than a pound of steak?
Because it's in ground state.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 10:41 am
by Kassidy Tran 1E
Why did the bear dissolve in water?
Because it was a polar bear.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 12:59 pm
by Celine Hoh 2L
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0 K?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 1:00 pm
by Celine Hoh 2L
If I steal your electrons would I be legally charged?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 3:11 pm
by Emilia z
Wow, chemistry jokes are Sodium funny

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 3:11 pm
by Emilia z
^ I slapped my Neon that one

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 3:12 pm
by Emilia z
Chemistry Community is such a great resource so I only try to post jokes periodically

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 3:20 pm
by Sam Joslyn 1G
Physical chemists must be rich because they have so many joules!! Hehe

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 8:45 pm
by Ivana Gutierrez 2L
!!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 8:46 pm
by Ivana Gutierrez 2L
haha...

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 8:48 pm
by Ivana Gutierrez 2L
!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 8:54 pm
by Ivana Gutierrez 2L
!!!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 8:54 pm
by Ivana Gutierrez 2L
lol ...

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 9:21 pm
by Ivana Gutierrez 2L
Spongebob memes never get old...

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 9:22 pm
by Ivana Gutierrez 2L
yikes..

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 9:23 pm
by Ivana Gutierrez 2L
ouch..

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 9:23 pm
by Ivana Gutierrez 2L
haha...

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2019 9:24 pm
by Ivana Gutierrez 2L
....

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 23, 2019 12:48 am
by Julia Cheng 4C
What does it mean when electrons lose energy?

They're Bohr-ed!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 23, 2019 12:48 am
by Julia Cheng 4C
Does a radioactive cat have 18 half-lives?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 23, 2019 12:49 am
by Julia Cheng 4C
Why is it best to teach thermodynamics on a cliff?

Because there's more potential there!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 23, 2019 5:16 pm
by I am Sodium Funny
If Avogadro calls, tell him to leave his number

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 23, 2019 5:18 pm
by I am Sodium Funny
Sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium... Batman

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 23, 2019 5:19 pm
by I am Sodium Funny
None of these jokes are catalyzing a reaction from

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 23, 2019 5:21 pm
by Gisselle Sainz 2F
A neutron walks into a shop and says,"I"d like a coke."
The shopkeeper serves up the coke.
"How much will that be?" asks the neutron.
The shopkeeper replies, "For you? No charge."

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 23, 2019 5:22 pm
by Gisselle Sainz 2F
Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he left the singles bar? He got Avogadro's number!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 23, 2019 5:22 pm
by Gisselle Sainz 2F
A proton and a neutron were walking down the street. The proton says, "Stop, I dropped an electron. Help me look for it." The neutron asks, "Are you sure?" The proton replies, "Yes, I'm positive."

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 23, 2019 6:41 pm
by davidbakalov_lec2_2L
Q: What kind of fish has two sodium atoms?
A: 2Na.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 23, 2019 9:57 pm
by MichelleTran 1I
If a king farts, is it a noble gas?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 23, 2019 9:59 pm
by MichelleTran 1I
Are you full of beryllium, gold, and titanium? Because you're Be-Au-Ti-ful!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 23, 2019 10:01 pm
by MichelleTran 1I
Image

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Feb 23, 2019 11:50 pm
by Michael Torres 4I
Free radicals have revolutionized chemistry.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 24, 2019 12:00 am
by Simran Rai 4E
:o

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 24, 2019 11:03 pm
by Natalie Liu 4I
I’ll tell you a joke about a tiny amount of iron for a small Fe

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 24, 2019 11:08 pm
by Natalie Liu 4I
I know a guy who cooled himself to -273.15C.

He was 0k.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 24, 2019 11:10 pm
by Edward Suarez 1I
H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?
Drinking.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 24, 2019 11:10 pm
by Edward Suarez 1I
How about the chemical workers… are they unionized?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 24, 2019 11:10 pm
by Edward Suarez 1I
Q: What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?
A: CoFe2

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2019 12:31 am
by diana_calderon_4L
Why did the attacking army use acid?
To neutralize the enemy’s base!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2019 12:31 am
by diana_calderon_4L
What do you do with a sick chemist?
If you can’t helium, and you can’t curium, then you might as well barium!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2019 12:32 am
by diana_calderon_4L
Old chemists never die…
They just stop reacting!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2019 7:43 pm
by Emilia z
Two men walk into a bar. the first man orders H2O, the second man asks for "H2O too". the second man dies.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2019 7:44 pm
by Emilia z
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? a one molar solution

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2019 7:45 pm
by Emilia z
A neutron walks into a bar and asks the bar tender how much for a soft drink. The bartender replies, "for you, no charge!"

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2019 8:44 pm
by vaishali 1D
What do you call a clown who's in jail?


A silicon.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2019 8:44 pm
by vaishali 1D
What kind of dogs do chemists have?


Laboratory Retrievers

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2019 9:58 pm
by Danielle Hoekstra 1C
Old chemists never die, they just stop reacting.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 25, 2019 10:01 pm
by Danielle Hoekstra 1C
I would tell another chemistry joke, but all the good ones Argon

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 02, 2019 3:50 pm
by Kassidy Tran 1E
Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero?
He's 0K now.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 02, 2019 3:51 pm
by Kassidy Tran 1E
Why are chemists good at solving problems? They have all the solutions.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 02, 2019 3:52 pm
by Kassidy Tran 1E
Why do chemists like to teach about ammonia? Because it's basic material.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 02, 2019 10:34 pm
by Kevin Nguyen 2H
Q: What is HIJKLMNO?
A: H2O.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 02, 2019 10:35 pm
by Kevin Nguyen 2H
Q: What kind of fish has two sodium atoms?
A: 2Na.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 02, 2019 10:35 pm
by Kevin Nguyen 2H
Q: What is CH2O?
A: Seawater

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 02, 2019 10:35 pm
by Kevin Nguyen 2H
I’d tell more chemistry jokes, but the best ones argon.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 02, 2019 10:36 pm
by Kevin Nguyen 2H
Q: If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
A: (H2O)3.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Mar 02, 2019 10:36 pm
by Kevin Nguyen 2H
Q: What can you make with 6.023 x 1023 avocados?
A: Guacamole

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 03, 2019 4:20 pm
by Edward Suarez 1I
take all ur lame chem jokes and barium

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 03, 2019 5:06 pm
by whitney_2C
some jokes for you

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 03, 2019 6:25 pm
by Anjali_Kumar1F
Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 03, 2019 7:43 pm
by Natalie Liu 4I
What substance has the formula HIJKLMNO?
Water.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 03, 2019 7:48 pm
by Natalie Liu 4I
What weapon can you make from the elements potassium, nickel, and iron?
A KNiFe.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 03, 2019 7:52 pm
by Natalie Liu 4I
I hated learning about electrons. I got so Bohr'd.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 03, 2019 8:04 pm
by Gisselle Sainz 2F
Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
It went OK.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 03, 2019 8:10 pm
by Gisselle Sainz 2F
Do you have mole problems? If so, call Avogadro at 602-1023

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 03, 2019 8:12 pm
by Gisselle Sainz 2F
Q: What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A: A ferrous wheel:
Fe - Fe
/ \
Fe Fe
\ /
Fe - Fe

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Mar 03, 2019 8:24 pm
by Shreya_Bharadwaj_1D
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Mar 04, 2019 12:06 am
by Julia Cheng 4C
You must be a compound of beryllium and barium because you're a real BaBe

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Mar 04, 2019 12:07 am
by Julia Cheng 4C
I'm out of good chemistry jokes...
I should zinc of some new ones

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Mar 04, 2019 12:09 am
by Julia Cheng 4C
What is CH2O called?

Seawater!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Mar 04, 2019 3:42 am
by diana_calderon_4L
Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero? He's 0K now

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Mar 04, 2019 3:42 am
by diana_calderon_4L
What do you call Iron blowing in the wind? Febreeze.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Mar 04, 2019 3:43 am
by diana_calderon_4L
Why did the noble gas cry? Because all his friends argon