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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Dec 07, 2019 10:43 am
by pavel1E
I think these jokes are sodium funny. In fact, I slapped my neon that one!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Dec 07, 2019 10:44 am
by pavel1E
Wait, are all these jokes too basic for you? Because I see no reaction.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Dec 07, 2019 10:44 am
by pavel1E
We'd give you some more chemistry jokes, but all the good ones argon.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Dec 07, 2019 10:45 am
by pavel1E
What should you do if no one laughs at your chemistry jokes?
Keep telling them until you get a reaction.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Dec 07, 2019 10:45 am
by pavel1E
Did you hear the one about cobalt, radon, and yttrium?
It was CoRnY.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Dec 07, 2019 10:45 am
by pavel1E
Want to hear a joke about sodium, bromine, and oxygen?
NaBrO.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Dec 07, 2019 10:46 am
by pavel1E
Someone threw sodium chloride at me.
I yelled, “That’s a salt!”

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Dec 07, 2019 10:46 am
by pavel1E
Outside his buckyball home, one molecule overheard another molecule saying, "I'm positive that a free electron once stripped me of an electron after he lepton me. You gotta keep your ion them."

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Dec 07, 2019 10:47 am
by pavel1E
What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A ferrous wheel:
Fe - Fe
/ \
Fe Fe
\ /
Fe - Fe

(that didn't come out well ): )

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Dec 07, 2019 9:15 pm
by 105289321
What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A ferrous wheel

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Dec 07, 2019 10:02 pm
by Alexis 3F
Last night oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 9:58 am
by Alexis 3F
What kinds of dogs do chemists have??

Laboratory Retrievers

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 3:17 pm
by 205154661_Dis2J
When you tell a chemistry joke and there are no reactions :(

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 3:38 pm
by 205154661_Dis2J
I am definitely "(dien)" after that chemistry final!!!!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 5:01 pm
by Akshay Chellappa 1H
Q: Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
A: They're cheaper than day rates.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 5:02 pm
by Akshay Chellappa 1H
Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 5:02 pm
by Akshay Chellappa 1H
Q: Anyone know any jokes about sodium?
A: Na

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 5:02 pm
by Akshay Chellappa 1H
Q: What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
A: HeHe

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 5:03 pm
by Akshay Chellappa 1H
Q: What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A: A ferrous wheel.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 10:05 pm
by Jaklin Astvatsatryan
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 10:06 pm
by Jaklin Astvatsatryan
.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 10:14 pm
by zfinn
Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you can't helium, and you can't curium, you might as well barium!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 11:05 pm
by Alan Cornejo 1a
Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."
Helium doesn't react.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 11:40 pm
by ShreyaKannan1B
I tried writing jokes about the periodic table…
…but I realized I wasn’t quite in my element.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 11:41 pm
by ShreyaKannan1B
What should you do if no one laughs at your chemistry jokes?
Keep telling them until you get a reaction.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 11:41 pm
by ShreyaKannan1B
Someone threw sodium chloride at me.
I yelled, “That’s a salt!”

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Dec 08, 2019 11:55 pm
by Naneeta Desar 1K
What do you call a funny heme complex?

A meme complex :D

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Jan 06, 2020 2:33 pm
by GFolk_1D
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Jan 06, 2020 2:34 pm
by GFolk_1D
.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Jan 09, 2020 3:17 pm
by nicole-2B
What animal is made up of calcium, nickel and neon?
A: A CaNiNe

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 12, 2020 11:55 am
by Jared Khoo 1G
Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero?
He's 0 K now.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 12, 2020 6:21 pm
by Oduwole 1E
Q: What is the best part about learning about equilibrium?

A: Nothing changes!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 12, 2020 6:29 pm
by Oduwole 1E
No Time to Die

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 12, 2020 7:04 pm
by Oduwole 1E
Q: What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

A: 2 Na

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 12, 2020 10:08 pm
by 305086803
How do you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber?

Ask how to pronounce the word “unionized”.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 12, 2020 10:09 pm
by 305086803
Why did the bear dissolve in water?

It was a polar bear

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 12, 2020 10:09 pm
by 305086803
Why do chemists call helium, barium and curium the medical elements?

Because if you can't helium or curium, you barium!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Jan 15, 2020 10:59 am
by nicole-2B
Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?
A: Because it's in the ground state.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Jan 15, 2020 1:25 pm
by Keya Jonnalagadda 1A
Get ready to laugh:

Q: What should you do if no one laughs at your chemistry jokes?
A: Keep telling them till you get a reaction!

Q: Want to hear a joke about Sodium, Bromine, and Oxygen?
A: NaBrO

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Jan 15, 2020 6:20 pm
by Ipsita Srinivas 1K
Elf 1: Why does Santa sound like -
Santa: He He He *squeaky voice af*
Elf 2: Oh, he's ingested some helium

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Jan 15, 2020 6:26 pm
by Ipsita Srinivas 1K
equilibrium.jpg

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Wed Jan 15, 2020 8:38 pm
by Maya Pakulski 1D
Why can you never trust atoms?


Because they make everything up.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 1:13 pm
by Jared Khoo 1G
Which element is the coldest?

Brrryllium

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 11:44 pm
by Jaklin Astvatsatryan
What do you do to dead elements? You barium.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 11:46 pm
by Jaklin Astvatsatryan
What do tomb robbers do to pyramids? -Radium

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 11:51 pm
by kendal mccarthy
If Avogadro calls.... tell him to leave his number ;)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 11:56 pm
by Oduwole 1E
A standup comedian tried writing jokes about the periodic table, but realized he wasn’t quite in his element.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 11:57 pm
by Oduwole 1E
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0 k?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 11:58 pm
by Oduwole 1E
Q: What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A: A ferrous wheel.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 19, 2020 11:59 pm
by Oduwole 1E
Q: Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

A: To reduce his carbon footprint.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Jan 20, 2020 4:37 pm
by GFolk_1D
.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Jan 23, 2020 6:27 pm
by Jaklin Astvatsatryan
Anions aren't negative, they're just misunderstood.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Jan 23, 2020 6:28 pm
by Jaklin Astvatsatryan
Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia? Because it's pretty basic stuff.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Jan 25, 2020 10:19 pm
by Ipsita Srinivas 1K
A good ol' cartoon

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sat Jan 25, 2020 10:31 pm
by Ipsita Srinivas 1K
Because we all need radioactive decay in our lives

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 26, 2020 6:16 pm
by zfinn
you can call me K because i don't change under pressure

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 26, 2020 6:17 pm
by Kate Osborne 1H
You're so hot you could change an equilibrium constant

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 26, 2020 9:11 pm
by JesseAuLec1Dis1G
Sb is antimony on the periodic table and how I remember it is Susan B Anthony >:)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 26, 2020 9:11 pm
by JesseAuLec1Dis1G
This is hard. All the funny chemistry jokes argon >:)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 26, 2020 9:21 pm
by JesseAuLec1Dis1G
Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you're CuTe.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 26, 2020 9:27 pm
by Amy Xiao 1I
Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 26, 2020 9:32 pm
by Amy Xiao 1I
Who is Gibbs, and why is he giving out free energy?

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 26, 2020 11:22 pm
by chimerila
For all my bilinguals out there:

Is Silicone the same in Spanish?
.
.
.
Si.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 26, 2020 11:27 pm
by chimerila
Be like a proton and stay positive, folks :)

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 26, 2020 11:50 pm
by Jaklin Astvatsatryan
What should you do if no one laughs at your chemistry jokes?
Keep telling them until you get a reaction.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Jan 26, 2020 11:51 pm
by Jaklin Astvatsatryan
Did you hear the joke about cobalt, radon, and yttrium?
It was CoRnY.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Jan 27, 2020 2:54 pm
by GFolk_1D
.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Jan 27, 2020 2:55 pm
by GFolk_1D
.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Jan 27, 2020 3:03 pm
by TimVintsDis4L
What should you do if noone laughs at your Chemistry joke.

Keep telling them until you get a reaction

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Jan 27, 2020 5:15 pm
by 305086803
Did you hear that Oxygen and Magnesium are dating?

OMg!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Jan 27, 2020 5:15 pm
by 305086803
Did you hear about the guy that was frozen to absolute zero?

I hear he was 0k.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Jan 27, 2020 9:28 pm
by nicole-2B
why do white bears dissolve in water?
because they are polar

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Jan 28, 2020 2:06 pm
by Oduwole 1E
Q: Why do people call organic chemistry the meanest science?

A: Because it’s always pushing electrons around!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Jan 28, 2020 2:07 pm
by Oduwole 1E
Q: If H2O is the formula for water, then what is the formula for ice?

A: H2O cubed!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Jan 28, 2020 2:08 pm
by Oduwole 1E
Q: What is HIJKLMNO?

A: H20

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Jan 30, 2020 10:36 pm
by Ipsita Srinivas 1K
A proton and a neutron were walking down the street. The proton says, "Stop, I dropped an electron. Help me look for it." The neutron asks, "Are you sure?" The proton replies, "Yes, I'm positive."

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Jan 30, 2020 10:37 pm
by Ipsita Srinivas 1K
Old chemists never die, they just stop reacting.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Jan 30, 2020 10:38 pm
by Ipsita Srinivas 1K
If Iron Man and Silver Surfer teamed up, they'd be alloys.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Jan 30, 2020 10:39 pm
by Ipsita Srinivas 1K
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Jan 30, 2020 10:41 pm
by Ipsita Srinivas 1K
What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder?
"You may have graduated but I've got many degrees."

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Thu Jan 30, 2020 10:42 pm
by Ipsita Srinivas 1K
What do you do with a dead chemist? Barium.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Jan 31, 2020 3:41 pm
by Naren_Ramesh_4F
Why does Water hate the equator?

Because water is a polar molecule.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Jan 31, 2020 10:32 pm
by Jared Khoo 1G
What atoms make up aspirin?
As P Ir In

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 02, 2020 9:48 pm
by CalvinTNguyen2D
Polar bears are unable to swim in water- they dissolve when they jump in.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 02, 2020 11:37 pm
by 005162520
I'm diene, but I'll keep triene !

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2020 5:52 pm
by 305086803
Why does a pound of hamburger have less energy than a pound of steak?

Because it is in the ground state.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2020 5:53 pm
by 305086803
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2020 5:53 pm
by 305086803
What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms? 2 Na

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 03, 2020 5:53 pm
by 305086803
I tried to tell a chemistry joke, but there was no reaction.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 09, 2020 5:12 pm
by Manav Govil 1B
Only in the world of chemistry can a Pb & J sandwich kill you. Unless you're allergic. Then you're also dead.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 09, 2020 5:30 pm
by Ryan_K_1K
Q: What kind of bear dissolves in water?

A: a POLAR bear!

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 09, 2020 5:31 pm
by Ryan_K_1K
Q: What did the photon say when it ran into the wall?

A: "Ow that hertz!"

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 09, 2020 10:28 pm
by Jaklin Astvatsatryan
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Sun Feb 09, 2020 10:32 pm
by Jaklin Astvatsatryan
Why did the attacking army use acid? To neutralize the enemy's base

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 10, 2020 6:49 pm
by Joseph Saba
https://www.relatably.com/m/img/light-memes/thumb.jpeg
You won't regret seeing this even though its a Chem14A joke

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Mon Feb 10, 2020 6:58 pm
by Brian_Ho_2B
Carbon tries to befriend his two new roommates Nitrogen and Oxygen.
Unfortunately they didn't bond well together.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 11, 2020 3:53 pm
by nicole-2B
Did you hear that Oxygen and Magnesium hooked up last night?
OMg

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Tue Feb 11, 2020 9:18 pm
by McKenna_4A
An atom of U can be oriented in one state, but in the USA, U can be 4 states at once.

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Feb 14, 2020 9:21 am
by kennedyp
I have developed such a weird love for chemistry jokes, I love this thread lol I'll try to add some every now and then, here's the first one!

Man, I hate when I tell a chemistry joke and I don't get a...REACTION!

This was horrible, I'm so sorry!! :((((

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Posted: Fri Feb 14, 2020 1:20 pm
by Oduwole 1E
Q: Why are chemists great for solving problems?

A: Because they always have a solution!