Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

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805383532
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 805383532 » Sun Mar 08, 2020 8:32 pm

If Silver Surfer and Iron Man teamed up, they’d be alloys.

305086803
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 305086803 » Mon Mar 09, 2020 4:09 am

"Close the window, you're letting the cold in"

"well... actually the second law of Thermodynamics states that heat goes out"

305086803
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 305086803 » Mon Mar 09, 2020 4:09 am

A chemistry professor couldn't resist interjecting a little philosophy into a class lecture. He interrupted his discussion on balancing chemical equations, saying, "Remember, if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate!"

305086803
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 305086803 » Mon Mar 09, 2020 4:10 am

Q: What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A: A ferrous wheel

305086803
Posts: 99
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 305086803 » Mon Mar 09, 2020 4:10 am

Q: If H-two-O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
A: H-two-O-CUBED

305086803
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Joined: Wed Sep 18, 2019 12:16 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 305086803 » Mon Mar 09, 2020 4:11 am

Q: What does a teary-eyed, joyful Santa say about chemistry?
A: HOH, HOH, HOH!

305086803
Posts: 99
Joined: Wed Sep 18, 2019 12:16 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 305086803 » Mon Mar 09, 2020 4:11 am

An electron sitting in a prison asked a second electron cellmate, "What are you in for?" To which the latter replied, "For attempting a forbidden transition."

305086803
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 305086803 » Mon Mar 09, 2020 4:11 am

Q: How many guacs are in a bowl of guacamole?
A: Avocados number.

305086803
Posts: 99
Joined: Wed Sep 18, 2019 12:16 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 305086803 » Mon Mar 09, 2020 4:12 am

Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
He just couldn't put it down.

305086803
Posts: 99
Joined: Wed Sep 18, 2019 12:16 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 305086803 » Mon Mar 09, 2020 4:12 am

Q: What did the chemical agent say?
A: My name is Bond, Ionic Bond. Taken, not shared

305086803
Posts: 99
Joined: Wed Sep 18, 2019 12:16 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 305086803 » Mon Mar 09, 2020 4:13 am

Q: What do you call a joke that is based on cobalt, radon, and yttrium?
A: CoRnY

Jaklin Astvatsatryan
Posts: 91
Joined: Wed Sep 18, 2019 12:18 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Jaklin Astvatsatryan » Mon Mar 09, 2020 9:10 am

oxygen went for a second date with potassium and
It went OK2!

Jaklin Astvatsatryan
Posts: 91
Joined: Wed Sep 18, 2019 12:18 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Jaklin Astvatsatryan » Mon Mar 09, 2020 9:12 am

What did one charged atom say to the other?
I've got my ion you.

Jaklin Astvatsatryan
Posts: 91
Joined: Wed Sep 18, 2019 12:18 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Jaklin Astvatsatryan » Mon Mar 09, 2020 9:13 am

What show do cesium and iodine love to watch together?
CsI

Ashley Fang 2G
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Ashley Fang 2G » Mon Mar 09, 2020 11:12 am

I heard that Oxygen and Magnesium were going out and I was like OMg

Ashley Fang 2G
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Ashley Fang 2G » Mon Mar 09, 2020 11:14 am

Do you have 11 protons?
Because you're sodium fine!

Emily Burghart 1k
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Emily Burghart 1k » Mon Mar 09, 2020 6:39 pm

Chem jokes
Attachments
Alternative chemistry lessons.jpg

JohannaPerezH2F
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby JohannaPerezH2F » Mon Mar 09, 2020 8:44 pm

good luck on finals yall
Attachments
chem jokes.jpg

Maika Ngoie 1B
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Maika Ngoie 1B » Wed Mar 11, 2020 3:39 pm

Image

Maika Ngoie 1B
Posts: 97
Joined: Fri Aug 02, 2019 12:16 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Maika Ngoie 1B » Wed Mar 11, 2020 3:58 pm

Image

me @Lavelle

Julia Holsinger_1A
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Julia Holsinger_1A » Wed Mar 11, 2020 4:56 pm

Image

Connor Ho 1B
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Connor Ho 1B » Wed Mar 11, 2020 10:57 pm

H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?



Drinking.

Naji Sarsam 1F
Posts: 104
Joined: Sat Aug 17, 2019 12:18 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Naji Sarsam 1F » Thu Mar 12, 2020 2:14 pm

As my last post for chemistry community ever:

Never trust an atom...

I've heard they make up everything...

JosephineF
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Joined: Wed Sep 18, 2019 12:17 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby JosephineF » Sat Mar 14, 2020 8:21 am

we're all gonna be this cool after we finish this final
Attachments
IMG_6739.JPG

JosephineF
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby JosephineF » Sat Mar 14, 2020 3:58 pm

How everyone is about to be with spring quarter online classes
Attachments
IMG_6740.JPG

Alan Cornejo 1a
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Alan Cornejo 1a » Sun Mar 15, 2020 6:44 am

Man: I wish I was the Enzyme DNA Helicase.
Woman: Why?
Man: So I could unzip your genes.

Alan Cornejo 1a
Posts: 98
Joined: Fri Aug 30, 2019 12:15 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Alan Cornejo 1a » Sun Mar 15, 2020 6:45 am

A neutron walks into a restaurant and orders a couple of drinks. As she is about to leave, she asks the waiter how much she owes. The waiter replies, “For you, No Charge!”

Alan Cornejo 1a
Posts: 98
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Alan Cornejo 1a » Sun Mar 15, 2020 6:45 am

Two atoms are walking down the street. Says one atom to the other, “Hey! I think I lost an electron!”
The other says, “Are you sure?”
“Yes, I’m positive!”

Alan Cornejo 1a
Posts: 98
Joined: Fri Aug 30, 2019 12:15 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Alan Cornejo 1a » Sun Mar 15, 2020 6:46 am

Do you know a good chemistry joke?
No sorry, all of them argon

Alan Cornejo 1a
Posts: 98
Joined: Fri Aug 30, 2019 12:15 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Alan Cornejo 1a » Sun Mar 15, 2020 6:48 am

I know a guy who cooled himself to -273.15C.

He was 0k.

Alan Cornejo 1a
Posts: 98
Joined: Fri Aug 30, 2019 12:15 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Alan Cornejo 1a » Sun Mar 15, 2020 6:48 am

I’m reading a chemistry book about helium.
I can’t put it down.

Julia Holsinger_1A
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Joined: Tue Feb 26, 2019 12:16 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Julia Holsinger_1A » Sun Mar 15, 2020 7:09 am

Image

805383532
Posts: 53
Joined: Thu Jul 11, 2019 12:16 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 805383532 » Sun Mar 15, 2020 1:48 pm

I would tell you a joke about chemistry, but they Argon.

805383532
Posts: 53
Joined: Thu Jul 11, 2019 12:16 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 805383532 » Sun Mar 15, 2020 1:49 pm

Someone threw sodium chloride at me. I’m still salty.

805383532
Posts: 53
Joined: Thu Jul 11, 2019 12:16 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 805383532 » Sun Mar 15, 2020 1:51 pm

Atoms are hard to trust. I heard they make up everything...

Kaylee Sepulveda 4G
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Kaylee Sepulveda 4G » Sun Mar 15, 2020 9:30 pm

What happens when oxygen atoms get haircuts?


They donate their lone hairs :)

Kaylee Sepulveda 4G
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Kaylee Sepulveda 4G » Sun Mar 15, 2020 9:36 pm

A few moles of lithium hexafluorophosphate were sentenced to five years in prison.



They were charged with a salt in battery. :)

Oduwole 1E
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Oduwole 1E » Sun Mar 15, 2020 11:18 pm

Two chemists walk into a bar.

One says, "I'll have H2O."

The other says, "Ill have H2O too."

The second chemist died.

Ivan Tadeja 1G
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Joined: Fri Sep 28, 2018 12:28 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Ivan Tadeja 1G » Mon Mar 16, 2020 1:02 pm

Have you heard about that one chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down ;)

Yailin Romo 4G
Posts: 109
Joined: Wed Feb 20, 2019 12:16 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Yailin Romo 4G » Mon Mar 16, 2020 10:15 pm

Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.

Jaklin Astvatsatryan
Posts: 91
Joined: Wed Sep 18, 2019 12:18 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Jaklin Astvatsatryan » Tue Mar 17, 2020 11:02 am

I tried writing jokes about the periodic table…
…but I realized I wasn’t quite in my element.

Jaklin Astvatsatryan
Posts: 91
Joined: Wed Sep 18, 2019 12:18 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Jaklin Astvatsatryan » Tue Mar 17, 2020 11:03 am

Are you made out of beryllium, ununtrium, and titanium ? Cause you're a BeUTi

Alan Cornejo 1a
Posts: 98
Joined: Fri Aug 30, 2019 12:15 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Alan Cornejo 1a » Tue Mar 17, 2020 4:49 pm

Two molecules are walking down the street and they run into each other. One says to the other, "Are you all right?"
"No, I lost an electron!"
"Are you sure?" "I'm positive!"

Alan Cornejo 1a
Posts: 98
Joined: Fri Aug 30, 2019 12:15 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Alan Cornejo 1a » Tue Mar 17, 2020 4:51 pm

The proton is not speaking to the other proton, he’s mad atom

Alan Cornejo 1a
Posts: 98
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Alan Cornejo 1a » Tue Mar 17, 2020 5:23 pm

Old chemists never die. They just stop reacting

Alan Cornejo 1a
Posts: 98
Joined: Fri Aug 30, 2019 12:15 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Alan Cornejo 1a » Tue Mar 17, 2020 5:23 pm

Why does a hamburger have less energy than steak? Because it's in the ground state!

Alan Cornejo 1a
Posts: 98
Joined: Fri Aug 30, 2019 12:15 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Alan Cornejo 1a » Tue Mar 17, 2020 5:24 pm

Carbon and hydrogen went on a date. I heard they really bonded

Alan Cornejo 1a
Posts: 98
Joined: Fri Aug 30, 2019 12:15 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby Alan Cornejo 1a » Tue Mar 17, 2020 5:24 pm

What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution!

005290099
Posts: 24
Joined: Sat Aug 24, 2019 12:16 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 005290099 » Tue Mar 17, 2020 5:43 pm

Q:What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
A: A one molar solution.

005290099
Posts: 24
Joined: Sat Aug 24, 2019 12:16 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 005290099 » Tue Mar 17, 2020 5:46 pm

Q:What helped the weak acid molecules go on strike?

A: They unionized.

005290099
Posts: 24
Joined: Sat Aug 24, 2019 12:16 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 005290099 » Tue Mar 17, 2020 5:51 pm

What do you do with a dead chemist
You Barium!

005290099
Posts: 24
Joined: Sat Aug 24, 2019 12:16 am

Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

Postby 005290099 » Tue Mar 17, 2020 5:57 pm

Organic chemistry is hard, I'm having alkynes of trouble


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