Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What do you do with a sick chemist?
If you can't helium and you can't curium then you might as well barium!
If you can't helium and you can't curium then you might as well barium!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I had to make these bad chemistry jokes
because all the good ones Argon.
because all the good ones Argon.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why did the hipster chemist burn his hand?
He touched the glass before it was cool.
He touched the glass before it was cool.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
.....it went OK.
.....it went OK.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What should you do if no one laughs at your chemistry jokes?
Keep telling them until you get a reaction.
Keep telling them until you get a reaction.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
He just couldn't put it down.
He just couldn't put it down.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why are chemists great at solving problems?
They have all the solutions!
They have all the solutions!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I heard organic chemistry is difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
A: H2O cubed.
A: H2O cubed.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?
A: OH SNaP!
A: OH SNaP!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What do you get when you cut an avocado into 6.022x10^23 pieces?
guaca-mole
guaca-mole
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Two chemists go into a bar. The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O." The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" — and he died.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why couldn't the photon go to sleep? Because it was full of energy.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What did the scientist say when he discovered 2 Helium atoms?
A: He He
A: He He
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you hear the joke about cobalt, radon, and yttrium?
- It was CoRnY
- It was CoRnY
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists find working with ammonia easy?
-Because it's pretty basic stuff!
-Because it's pretty basic stuff!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
One guacamole is 6.022x10^23 guaca; also known as Avacado's constant.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the scientist say when she found two isotopes of helium?
HeHe.
HeHe.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walk into a bar.
"OH SNaP!" said the bartender.
"OH SNaP!" said the bartender.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What should you do if nobody laughs at your chemistry jokes?
A: Keep telling them until you get a reaction!
A: Keep telling them until you get a reaction!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Want to hear a joke about sodium, bromine, and oxygen?
A: NaBrO!
A: NaBrO!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Did you hear about Potassium's date with Oxygen?
A: Yeah, I heard it went OK.
A: Yeah, I heard it went OK.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
He just couldn't put it down.
He just couldn't put it down.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?
A: He was booked for a salt and battery.
A: He was booked for a salt and battery.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why did the hipster chemist get burned?
A: He touched the beaker for it was cool.
A: He touched the beaker for it was cool.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why aren't chemists ever able to prank their friends?
Because they lack the element of surprise!
Because they lack the element of surprise!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?
Because it's pretty basic stuff.
Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?
Because it's in the ground state.
Because it's in the ground state.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If H20 is water, what is H204?
Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, a lot of things actually.
Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, a lot of things actually.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walk into a bar.
“OH SNaP!” says the bartender.
“OH SNaP!” says the bartender.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?
...because it's in the ground state.
...because it's in the ground state.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If H20 is the chemical formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
H20 cubed.
H20 cubed.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the two scientists that fell in love say to each other?
We have a lot of chemistry.
We have a lot of chemistry.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I tried writing jokes about the periodic table
...but I realized I wasn’t quite in my element.
...but I realized I wasn’t quite in my element.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you hear the one about cobalt, radon, and yttrium?
It was CoRnY.
It was CoRnY.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A photon walks into a hotel and is asked if he needs help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Sixteen sodiums walk into a room. Who's next? Na - Na - Na - Na - Na - Na - Na - Na - Na - Na - Na - Na - Na - Na - Na - Na - BATMAN
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of helium? HeHe
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was a polar bear.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A photon walks into a hotel. The bellhop says "Can we help you with your luggage?". The photon replies, "No thanks, I'm traveling light"
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you know you can cool yourself to -273.15 degrees Celsius and still be okay?
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?
A: CSI
A: CSI
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?
A: He got Avogadro’s number!
A: He got Avogadro’s number!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you know protons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I'd be the photon to your electron and take you to an excited state.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A mole of moles would collapse under its own weight and become a black mole.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia? Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A proton and a neutron were walking down the street. The proton says, "Stop, I dropped an electron. Help me look for it." The neutron asks, "Are you sure?" The proton replies, "Yes, I'm positive."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder?
"You may have graduated, but I've got many degrees!"
"You may have graduated, but I've got many degrees!"
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why did carbon marry hydrogen?
They bonded well from the minute they met!
They bonded well from the minute they met!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of helium? HeHe
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A neutron walks into a shop and says,"I"d like a coke." The shopkeeper serves up the coke.
"How much will that be?" asks the neutron.
The shopkeeper replies,
"For you? No charge."
"How much will that be?" asks the neutron.
The shopkeeper replies,
"For you? No charge."
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