Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

[Kevin Nguyen 2H]

Q: What do you call a joke that is based on cobalt, radon, and yttrium?
A: CoRnY.

[Arman M 1A]

Don't be So Salt - y. I don't know why the Y isn't included at the end lol!

[davidbakalov_lec2_2L]

I’d tell more chemistry jokes, but the best ones argon.

[davidbakalov_lec2_2L]

Q: If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
A: (H2O)^3.

[I am Sodium Funny]

If H20 is water, what is H204?
Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.

If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
H2O cubed.

Anyone know any jokes about the element sodium?
Na.

Have been trying to figure out the first joke for almost a year and I can't figure out lmao

[I am Sodium Funny]

Enjoy the joke!

hehe moles lol

[Kassidy Tran 1E]

What did the pregnant scientist say at the end of her electrolysis experiment?
"My water broke"

[Kassidy Tran 1E]

Why did chlorine get in trouble for the acid attack?
It was guilt by dissociation.

[Kassidy Tran 1E]

What is Iron Man's gender?
Fe Male

[MichelleTran 1I]

I told a chemistry joke on here once, but I didn't get a reaction :C

[Emilia z]

Don’t trust atoms, they make up everything

[Emilia z]

I would write a funny chemistry joke, but all the good ones Argon

[MichelleTran 1I]

An acid with an attitude is jut an a-mean-o-acid

[MichelleTran 1I]

What is Cesium and Iodine's favorite drama?

CSI C:

[Edward Suarez 1I]

y'all should zinc of new chemistry jokes

[Gisselle Sainz 2F]

What is a cation afraid of? A dogion.

[Gisselle Sainz 2F]

Every dipole has its moment

[Natalie Liu 4I]

Why did the noble gas cry?
Because all his friends Argon

[Natalie Liu 4I]

What do you call Iron blowing in the wind?
Fe-breeze

[Natalie Liu 4I]

What is a chemist's favorite kind of tree?
A chemistree

[Tony Ong 3K]

Two chemists walk into a bar.
One says, “I’ll have an ‎H2O.” The other says, “I’ll have an ‎H2O, too.” The second chemist dies.

*H202 is hydrogen peroxide

[Tony Ong 3K]

What should you do if no one laughs at your chemistry jokes?
Keep telling them until you get a reaction.

[Tony Ong 3K]

Did you hear the joke about the chemist?
Me neither.

[diana_calderon_4L]

Why do chemistry students do well when working with ammonia? Because it's pretty basic stuff.

[diana_calderon_4L]

Two atoms are walking down the street.
One of them shouts, "Hey! I think I lost an electron!"
The other inquires, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm positive!"

[diana_calderon_4L]

The best thing about learning equilibrium is that nothing changes.

[Julia Cheng 4C]

All of my good chemistry jokes argon, so I had to resort to this basic one.

[Julia Cheng 4C]

Beware of enthalpy pirates!
They’ll steal all your joules

[Julia Cheng 4C]

Entropy: it’s not what it used to be.

[Phil Timoteo 1K]

Photons don't ever need help with their luggage, they're traveling light. LOL

[vaishali 1D]

If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.

[vaishali 1D]

The name's Bond. Ionic Bond. Taken, not shared.

[vaishali 1D]

The best thing about learning equilibrium is that nothing changes.

[Emilia z]

What is a cation afraid of? A dogion

[Emilia z]

Every dipole has its moment

[Emilia z]

Why do white bears dissolve in water? they're polar

[Gracie Ge 2E]

a teacher asks three students if they can fill up an entire classroom with something.
half an hour later, student A returns with a sack of flour, shuts the windows, and pours the flour all over the room.
student B lights a candle and brings it into the room.
student C sees this and runs.
student C survives.

[Gracie Ge 2E]

a photon arrives at a hotel. "do you need to check in your luggage?", the receptionist asks.
"no," the photon replies, "i'm traveling light".
(not exactly chemistry but

[Arman M 1A]

Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."
Helium doesn't react.

[Kassidy Tran 1E]

What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of helium?
HeHe

[Kassidy Tran 1E]

What was Avogadro’s favorite sport?
Golf, because he always got a mole-in-one.

[Shreya_Bharadwaj_1D]

I don't trust atoms because they make up everything

[I am Sodium Funny]

Lmao

[I am Sodium Funny]

I started using tinder to ignite up my love life bt it had a negative reaction

[Julia Cheng 4C]

I dare you to lower your body temperature to absolute zero.

I promise you’ll be 0K!

[Julia Cheng 4C]

Are you made of fluorine, iodine, and neon?

Becauze you’re FINe!

[Julia Cheng 4C]

Why does hamburger have less energy than steak?

Because it’s in the ground state!

[Kriti Goyal 4K 19]

Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
He just couldn't put it down.

[Kriti Goyal 4K 19]

Q: What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?
A: CoFe2

[Kriti Goyal 4K 19]

Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium.

[Eva Guillory 2E]

Honestly, it's kinda hard to come up with clever jokes for this thread. All the good ones argon.

[davidbakalov_lec2_2L]

Q: What do you call a clown in prison?
A: Silicon

[Edward Suarez 1I]

i try to post chemistry jokes but theres no reaction

[Edward Suarez 1I]

how often do i tell chemistry jokes?

periodically

jk weekly

[Edward Suarez 1I]

the name's bond, ionic bond.

[Natalie Liu 4I]

Got mole problems? Call Avogadro at 602-1023.

[Natalie Liu 4I]

Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They're cheaper than day rates.

[Natalie Liu 4I]

A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."

[diana_calderon_4L]

What can you make with 6.023 x 1023 avocados? Guacamole

[diana_calderon_4L]

Heisenberg is out for a drive when he’s stopped by a traffic cop. The cop says: ” Do you know how fast you were going? Heisenberg replies: “No, but I know where I am”.

[diana_calderon_4L]

Do you know any good sodium jokes?
Na.
You should, they’re sodium funny!

[Tony Ong 3K]

Q: What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?
A: CoFe2

hehehehehe

[Tony Ong 3K]

Q: Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
A: It went OK.

[Tony Ong 3K]

hehe this ones a goood one

Q: What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
A: HeHe

hehe get it?

[Gracie Ge 2E]

iphone 6 has four friends.
iphone 6s, iphone 6p, iphone 6d, iphone 6f.

[MichelleTran 1I]

I can't trust atoms anymore, I heard they make up everything.

[Kevin Nguyen 2H]

Q: Why do chemistry students do well when working with ammonia?
A: Because it's pretty basic stuff.

[Kevin Nguyen 2H]

Every dipole has their moment.

[Kevin Nguyen 2H]

Free radicals have revolutionized chemistry.

[Kevin Nguyen 2H]

I studied exothermic reactions before they were cool.

[Kevin Nguyen 2H]

yo momma so ugly not even fluorine would bond w her.

[Kevin Nguyen 2H]

Q: Why does the army use acid?
A: To neutralize the enemy base.

[Kevin Nguyen 2H]

Q: What can you make with 6.023 x 1023 avocados?
A: Guacamole

[Kevin Nguyen 2H]

Q: Why should you go drinking with neutrons?
A: Wherever they go, there’s no charge.

[Kevin Nguyen 2H]

Q: What do you call a clown in prison?
A: Silicon

[Julia Cheng 4C]

You must be made of uranium and iodine because all I can see is U and I together

[Julia Cheng 4C]

Are you a carbon sample? Because I'd like to date you.

[Julia Cheng 4C]

I told my friend a chemistry joke, but there was no reaction...

[LaurenJuul_1B]

Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 degrees Celsius and still be 0K?

[904914909]

What was the chemists favorite drink?
ChemisTEA

[Letizia Ye 4F]

Q: What is Josaiah Willard Gibbs' favorite holiday?
A: ThanksGibbing

[mcredi]

[davidbakalov_lec2_2L]

[davidbakalov_lec2_2L]

[Alexa_Henrie_1I]

What do you do with a sick chemist?
If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium.

[Sean_Rodriguez_1J]

Why does a pound of hamburger have less energy than a pound of steak?



Because it is in the ground state.

[Edward Suarez 1I]

what do you call iron blowing in the wind?

FeBreeze!

[Edward Suarez 1I]

if a king farts, is it a noble gas?

[Michael Torres 4I]

OMG

Did you hear that Oxygen and Magnesium are a couple?

[Emilia z]

If a king farts is it a Nobel gas?

[Emilia z]

Once i told a chemistry joke... but there was no reaction

[Emilia z]

I try to only tell chemistry jokes periodically

[Cienna Henry 1J]

What did one charged atom say to the other? I’ve got my ion you.

[Douglas Nguyen 2J]

I tell biology jokes because all of the chemistry ones argon!

[Luis_Yepez_1F]

What do you call an acid with an attitude?

An A-mean-o-acid.

[805169754]

How about the chemical workers… are they unionized?

[805169754]

What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?
CSI

[805169754]

Anyone know any jokes about sodium?
Na

[805169754]

What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
HeHe

[Porus_Karwa_2E]

Q: Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?
A: He got Avogadro's number!