Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists learn about ammonia first?
It's pretty basic, really.
It's pretty basic, really.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Chemistry is a lot like cooking, only you really shouldn't lick the spoon.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
How did the hipster chemist burn his hand?
He picked up his beaker before it was cool.
He picked up his beaker before it was cool.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why did the attacking army use acid?
To neutralize the enemy’s base.
To neutralize the enemy’s base.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the thermometer say to the measuring cylinder?
“You may be graduated, but I have several degrees.”
“You may be graduated, but I have several degrees.”
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I dare you to lower your body temperature to absolute zero.
I promise you'll be 0K.
I promise you'll be 0K.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Two chemists walk into a bar.
One says, "I'll have an H2O." The other says, "I'll have an H2O, too." The second chemist died
One says, "I'll have an H2O." The other says, "I'll have an H2O, too." The second chemist died
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I would tell another chemistry joke...
...but all the good ones Argon.
...but all the good ones Argon.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Helium walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve noble gases here." Helium doesn't react.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What should you do if no one laughs at your chemistry jokes?
keep telling them until you get a reaction.
(ughhhhhhhhhhhh)
keep telling them until you get a reaction.
(ughhhhhhhhhhhh)
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Two atoms are walking down a street.
One of them shouts, "Hey, I lost an electron!"
The other asks, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm positive!"
One of them shouts, "Hey, I lost an electron!"
The other asks, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm positive!"
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
The best thing about learning about equilibrium is that nothing changes.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Learning about electrons is exciting, they bring chemistry to a whole new level.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A: A ferrous wheel!
A: A ferrous wheel!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
We would like to apologize for not adding more jokes... but we only update them.... periodically!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
HeHe
HeHe
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?
A: CSI
A: CSI
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
(you're welcome)
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
two chemists walk into a bar
one says i'll have an h2o
the other says i'll have an h2o too
the second chemist dies...
one says i'll have an h2o
the other says i'll have an h2o too
the second chemist dies...
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
He just couldn't put it down.
He just couldn't put it down.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.
They're cheaper than day rates.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."
Helium doesn't react.
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."
Helium doesn't react.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.
They're cheaper than day rates.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I was gonna tell a chemistry joke, but then I thought "Na... no one would get it."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What's the difference between chemistry jokes and physics jokes?
Chemistry jokes can be funny periodically, but physics jokes have more potential.
Chemistry jokes can be funny periodically, but physics jokes have more potential.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why does hamburger have less energy than steak?
It's the ground state.
It's the ground state.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I would tell another chemistry joke
...but all the good ones Argon.
...but all the good ones Argon.
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- Joined: Fri Sep 28, 2018 12:17 am
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Two chemists walk into a bar.
One says, “I’ll have an H2O.” The other says, “I’ll have an H2O, too.”
The second chemist dies.
One says, “I’ll have an H2O.” The other says, “I’ll have an H2O, too.”
The second chemist dies.
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- Joined: Fri Sep 28, 2018 12:17 am
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What should you do if no one laughs at your chemistry jokes?
Keep telling them until you get a reaction.
Keep telling them until you get a reaction.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
In a sports relay race, a chemical kinetics specialist runs slowly, and his group loses the race.
When the chemical kinetics specialist is asked why he ran slowly, his reply was “I always wanted to be the significant rate determining step”.
When the chemical kinetics specialist is asked why he ran slowly, his reply was “I always wanted to be the significant rate determining step”.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Pick up line joke:
You must be a compound of Barium and Beryllium because you are a
BaBe.
You must be a compound of Barium and Beryllium because you are a
BaBe.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemistry do well when working with ammonia?
Because it's pretty basic stuff.
Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
A: One molar solution.
A: One molar solution.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
A: HeHe
A: HeHe
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?
A: Because it's in the ground state.
A: Because it's in the ground state.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
A: It went OK.
A: It went OK.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?
Drinking.
Drinking.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
In a sports relay race, a chemical kinetics specialist runs slowly, and his group loses the race.
When the chemical kinetics specialist is asked why he ran slowly, his reply was “I always wanted to be the significant rate determining step”.
When the chemical kinetics specialist is asked why he ran slowly, his reply was “I always wanted to be the significant rate determining step”.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A. First you try to helium, then you try to curium, but if this fails then you have to barium.
A. First you try to helium, then you try to curium, but if this fails then you have to barium.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite…
He said NaBrO
He said NaBrO
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
A: HeHe
A: HeHe
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A chemistry lab is a lot like a party! Some drop acid, some drop the bass.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
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