Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

[GEOVANNAO_3F]

Q: Anyone know any jokes about sodium? A: Na

[GEOVANNAO_3F]

The name's Bond. Ionic Bond. Taken, not shared.

[GEOVANNAO_3F]

Q: What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms? A: A ferrous wheel.

[GEOVANNAO_3F]

Old chemists never die, they just stop reacting.

[Ashley Fang 2G]

What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory retrievers!

[Ashley Fang 2G]

hahaha

[Ashley Fang 2G]

Think like a proton and be positive!

[Jared Khoo 1G]

How often do I tell chemistry jokes?
Periodically.

[Jared Khoo 1G]

Thank you Dr. Lavelle for putting the Cation in education.

[Jared Khoo 1G]

Why is working with ammonia easy?
Because its quite basic.

[nicole-2B]

Why can you never trust atoms?
A: They make up everything!

[TYun_1C]

Michael Jackson be like....
atomic #2, atomic #2
(He He)

[Joanne Kang 3I]

[Joanne Kang 3I]

When someone posts a really obvious question on Chem Community...
Everyone:

[GEOVANNAO_3F]

Why should you go drinking with neutrons? Because wherever they go, there's no charge!

[Salma Fawzi 4G]

A neutron walks into a shop and says, "I would like a coke."
The shopkeeper serves up the coke.
"How much will that be?" asks the neutron.
The shopkeeper replies, "For you? No charge."

[Salma Fawzi 4G]

A proton and a neutron were walking down the street. The proton says, "Stop, I dropped an electron. Help me look for it." The neutron asks, "Are you sure?" The proton replies, "Yes, I'm positive."

[Salma Fawzi 4G]

Silver walks up to gold in a store and says, "Au, get out of here!"

[Callum Guo 1H]

What weapon can you make from the elements potassium, nickel and iron? A KNiFe.

[ShastaB4C]

[ShastaB4C]

Week 9 has me like...

[ShastaB4C]

What is the chemical formula of coffee?






CoFe2

Isn’t this CoFeFe? LOL

[ShastaB4C]

[Callum Guo 1H]

What's Ba(Na2)?

a banana.

[Patricia Cardenas]

All the good chemistry jokes Argon.

[Jaklin Astvatsatryan]

I tried writing jokes about the periodic table... but I realized it wasn't in my element

[saigorijavolu2k]

Old chemists never die. They just stop reacting!

[saigorijavolu2k]

A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender gives him a smile and says, "For you, no charge."

[Jaklin Astvatsatryan]

Where do you put dirty dishes? In the zinc.

[Deena Doan 2F]

I'm sad. All of the good chemistry jokes argon :(

[305086803]

A photon checks into a hotel, and the desk clerk asks, "Have you any luggage?"

To which the photon replies, "No, I'm travelling light."

[305086803]

Never trust an atom.

They make up everything.

[305086803]

A man walks into a bar and asks for some H2O the man next to him says he’ll have some H2O too but he dies.

[305086803]

Call 911 on your sulfone, because I'm diene.

[305086803]

Let's take alle these Bad Chemistry Jokes

and Barium!

[305086803]

What do chemists call a party where human-human interactions are negligible?

Ideal!

[305086803]

I would give you one, but all the good ones Argon.

[rachelle1K]

Two chemists walk into a bar. One tells the bartender, "I'll have an H2O." The other says, "I'll have an H2O too!" The second chemist dies.

Found this one online and it made me laugh a little bit harder than I should’ve.

[AnvitaaAnandkumar_1B]

Two chemists walk into a bar.
One says, “I’ll have an ‎H2O.” The other says, “I’ll have an ‎H2O, too.” The second chemist dies.

[Anna Wu 1H]

How often do i tell chemistry jokes?



Periodically

[Anna Wu 1H]

Did you hear that oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.

[Anna Wu 1H]

What did the scientist say when he found two isotopes of Helium?



HeHe

[Anna Wu 1H]

Why does a hamburger yield lower energy than a steak?


Because it's in the ground state.

[Anna Wu 1H]

Why do chemists like working with ammonia?


It's pretty basic stuff.

[nicole-2B]

Why did the military use acid?
To neutralize the enemy base.

[Vivianvelazquez_1J]

haha

[Matt Sanruk 2H]

clicking remember me when logging in

[Chetas Holagunda 3H]

Why shouldn't you trust atoms?

They make up everything.

[Ellis Song 4I]

How often do I tell chemistry jokes??? Periodically

[Joanne Kang 3I]

[Joanne Kang 3I]

Finals are coming...
but my last brain cells argon...
My gpa and social life argonna be gone soon too..

[Jaklin Astvatsatryan]

A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."

[Alexis 3F]

What kind of fish is made out of sodium atoms??
2 Na

[Kaitlyn Ang 1J]

Original meme content

[Nawal Dandachi 1G]

AU! THESE JOKES ARE GOLD, SO READ 'EM

[Nawal Dandachi 1G]

What did one charged atom say to the other?
I got my ion you!

[105289321]

What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of helium? HeHe

[chari_maya 3B]

Little Billy was a chemist
Little Billy is no more
What he thought was H2O
was really H2SO4!

[Chem_Mod]

Good luck studying for the final! Here’s a meme if you’re on study break:

[nicole-2B]

What do you call an acid with an attitude?
a-mean-oh-acid

[Jade Hinds 2B]

Heres a fun way to memorize the three (OH)2 strong bases:

"drink your milk (Ca (OH)2) so you can be a strong (Sr (OH)2) baller (Ba (OH)2)"!!!

[bloodorangefield]

When you tell a chemistry joke but there is no reaction

[305086803]

What did the hydrogen atom say to the other atom?
I think we should bond

[305086803]

Why are long-distance relationships harder?
The force of attraction is weaker as distance increases.

[305086803]

why do the call Helium Barium and Curium the medical elements
Because if you cant Helium or Curium then you Barium

[Jason Wu 1E]

What do you always get with your extra swipes at Rende during Week 10?

5 8 56

*periodictable.jpg

[Areli C 1L]

Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?
-Because it's pretty basic stuff.

[pavel1E]

Two chemists walk into a bar. One tells the bartender, "I'll have an H2O." The other says, "I'll have an H2O too!" The second chemist dies.

[pavel1E]

Why did the attacking army use acid? To neutralize the enemy's base!

[pavel1E]

What do you do with a sick chemist? If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium!

[pavel1E]

Oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walk into a bar."OH SNaP!" says the bartender.

[pavel1E]

Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium? He just couldn't put it down!

[pavel1E]

What's the dullest element? Bohrium!

[pavel1E]

Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They're cheaper than day rates!

[pavel1E]

A neutron walks into a club. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender gives him a smile and says, "For you, no charge."

[pavel1E]

Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium? It went OK!

[pavel1E]

The optimist sees the glass half full. The pessimist sees the glass half empty, but how does the chemist see it? Completely full, half with liquid and half with air.

[pavel1E]

Why does a hamburger have less energy than steak? Because it's in the ground state!

[pavel1E]

What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder? "You may have graduated, but I've got many degrees."

[pavel1E]

Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was polar!

[pavel1E]

What did one charged atom say to the other? I got my ion you!

[pavel1E]

Why was the mole of nitrogen molecules excited when he left the singles bar? Because he got Avogadro's number!

[pavel1E]

Two atoms are walking down the street. One atom says to the other, "Hey! I think I lost an electron!" The other asks, "Are you sure?" "Yes, I'm positive!"

[pavel1E]

Why should you go drinking with neutrons? Because wherever they go, there's no charge!

[pavel1E]

What's a chemistry teachers favorite thing to teach about? Ammonia, because it's pretty basic stuff.

[pavel1E]

What happens when you lower your body temperature to -273°C? Nothing, you're perfectly 0K!

[pavel1E]

Why are chemists great for solving problems? Because they always have a solution!

[pavel1E]

How did the hipster chemist burn his hand on the beaker? He picked it up before it was cool.

[pavel1E]

Carbon and hydrogen went on a date. I heard they really bonded.

[pavel1E]

I want to write some jokes about the periodic table… But I don't think I'll be in my element.

[pavel1E]

What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution!

[pavel1E]

What show do cesium and iodine love to watch together? CsI!

[pavel1E]

What was Avogadro's favorite sport? Golf! He always got a mole-in-one!

[pavel1E]

What did silver say to gold at the bar? "Au, get outta here!"

[pavel1E]

What did silver say to gold at the bar? "Au, get outta here!"

[pavel1E]

Anyone know any jokes about sodium? Na.

[pavel1E]

If you're not part of the solution…you're part of the precipitate.

[pavel1E]

What do you call a clown in jail? A Silicon!

[pavel1E]

What is the chemical formula for sea water? CH2O!

[pavel1E]

Want to hear a joke about nitrogen oxide? NO!