Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I wouldn't say this is a joke, but I remember thinking it was kinda funny so I just wanted to share a chem experience! When I was first learning nomenclature in my chemistry class, the teacher joked that our local lake was full of dihydrogen monoxide. My whole class started saying things like "Dihydrogen monoxide? Isn't that poisonous? I've heard of that in the news once." Then she retaught that section.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
what should you do if no one laughs at your chemistry jokes?
keep telling them until you get a reaction
keep telling them until you get a reaction
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I tried writing jokes about the periodic table.. but I realized I wasn't quite in my element
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Two chemists go into a bar. The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O." The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" — and he died.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A photon walks into a hotel and is asked if he needs help with his luggage. He says "no thanks. I'm traveling light."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you hear about the guy who was cooled to absolute zero? He's 0K now.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why are chemists good at solving problems? They have all the solutions
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?
2 Na
get it? (tuna)
2 Na
get it? (tuna)
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?
He got Avogadro's number!
He got Avogadro's number!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I'd give you some more chemistry jokes, but all the good ones ARGON.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If H2O is the formula for water, then what is the formula for ice? H2O cubed!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Wait, are all these jokes too basic for you? Because I see no reaction.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What was Avogadro's favorite sport? Golf! He always got a mole-in-one!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?
A: He got Avogadro's number!
A: He got Avogadro's number!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why are chemists so great at solving problems? Because they have all the solutions.
Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was a polar bear.
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."
Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it was a polar bear.
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What show do Cesium and Iodine love to watch together?
CsI
(I hope no one has recently posted this joke)
CsI
(I hope no one has recently posted this joke)
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What should you do if no one laughs at your chemistry jokes?
A: Keep telling them until you get a reaction.
Q: Did you hear the one about cobalt, radon, and yttrium?
A: It was CoRnY.
A: Keep telling them until you get a reaction.
Q: Did you hear the one about cobalt, radon, and yttrium?
A: It was CoRnY.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
i can only tell bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones argon )-:
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why shouldn't you drink water while studying?
It decreases your concentration :)
It decreases your concentration :)
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?
It went OK2!
How did it go?
It went OK2!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What is the most important rule in chemistry?
A: Never lick the spoon!
A: Never lick the spoon!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why can you never trust an atom?
They make up literally everything!
They make up literally everything!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What do you call a C₆H₁₂O₆ molecule that can use its right and left hands equally well?
Ambidextrose
Ambidextrose
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
With Finals Week approaching, here's a "cursed meme" to raise your serotonin, C₁₀H₁₂N₂O. Don't work yourself too hard and be sure to take breaks!!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Heisenberg was cruising down the highway one day when he gets pulled over by a police officer. The officer gets out of his car, and Heisenberg can tell he's quite angry. The officer approaches the window fuming.
"Do you have any idea how fast you were going?!" the officer asks.
"No" replied Heisenberg, "But I know where I am."
"Do you have any idea how fast you were going?!" the officer asks.
"No" replied Heisenberg, "But I know where I am."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite…
He said NaBrO
He said NaBrO
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A photon checks into a hotel and the bellboy asks, "Can I take your bags?" The photon answers, "No thanks, I'm travelling light."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why do you go to jail for throwing sodium chloride for somebody?
A: Because its a salt.
A: Because its a salt.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?
A: Because it's in the ground state.
A: Because it's in the ground state.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
why are chemists so great at solving problems?
because they have so many solutions!
because they have so many solutions!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I tried to come up with a joke about the periodic table but I was way out of my element
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What should you do if no one laughs at your chemistry jokes?
Keep telling them until you get a reaction.
:)
Keep telling them until you get a reaction.
:)
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A little throwback to when classes were in-person and we did labs :"
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
The optimist sees the glass half full. The pessimist sees the glass half empty. The chemist sees the glass completely full, half with liquid and half with air.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Organic chemistry is difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why does a hamburger have less energy than steak? Because it's in the ground state!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They're cheaper than day rates!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I think these jokes are sodium funny. In fact, I slapped my neon that one!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Don’t trust atoms, they make up everything
Q: Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
A: He just couldn’t put it down
Q: Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
A: They’re cheaper than day rates.
Q: I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite…
A: He said NaBrO
Q: Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
A: He just couldn’t put it down
Q: Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
A: They’re cheaper than day rates.
Q: I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite…
A: He said NaBrO
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.
They're cheaper than day rates.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you know that oxygen went on a second date with potassium?
How'd it go?
It went OK2
How'd it go?
It went OK2
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What happens when you lower your body temperature to -273°C? Nothing, you're perfectly 0K!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If H2O is the formula for water, then what is the formula for ice?
H2O cubed!
H2O cubed!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What's your reaction when you find out oxygen and magnesium are dating?
OMg!!
OMg!!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Two chemists walk into a bar. The first orders a water. The second says, "I'll have an H20, too!" The second chemist dies
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walk into a bar.
“OH SNaP!” says the bartender.
“OH SNaP!” says the bartender.
Last edited by AHUNT_1A on Sun Dec 06, 2020 8:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did one titration say to the other?
"Let's meet at the endpoint."
"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gases in here."
Helium doesn't react.
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gases in here."
Helium doesn't react.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Two chemists meet for the first time at a symposium. One is American, one is British. The British chemists asks the American chemist, "So what do you do for research?" The American responds, "Oh, I work with arsoles." The Brit responds, "Yes, sometimes my colleagues get on my nerves also."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I don't have any jokes per say but I have a pair of his and hers mugs.
H-Hydrogen
Er- Erbium
S- Sulfur
I used to think they were pretty funny until I started to take chem again.
H-Hydrogen
Er- Erbium
S- Sulfur
I used to think they were pretty funny until I started to take chem again.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0 k?
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What's H204?
Depends. If you're thirsty, drinking. If you're dirty, washing.
Depends. If you're thirsty, drinking. If you're dirty, washing.
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