Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
In honor of a very successful quarter of chemistry jokes from my peers in 14B I would just like to say that personally, I tell bad chemistry jokes because all of the good ones Argon!
Re: Chemistry Jokes
What is a Ochem students favorite kind of plant?
A chemistree hahahahahhaha
A chemistree hahahahahhaha
Last edited by Daniel23 on Sat Mar 12, 2016 3:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Re: Chemistry Jokes
Why did Chlorine's sisters Boron and Carbon lock her in the closet?
Because she was too attractive!
Because she was too attractive!
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
I didn't drink water today while studying for finals. I was afraid it would've diluted my concentration
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
-Why isn't energy made of atoms? It doesn't matter
-Lose an electron? You should really keep a better ion them next time
-What does an anatomist give you when he's mad? A scowl-pal
-Lose an electron? You should really keep a better ion them next time
-What does an anatomist give you when he's mad? A scowl-pal
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
Take all your lame chemistry jokes and....barium.
I'm sorry, I make bad chemistry puns...periodically.
I'm sorry, I make bad chemistry puns...periodically.
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
According to a chemist, why is the world so diverse?
Because it is made up of alkynes of people.
Because it is made up of alkynes of people.
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much for a drink. The bartender replies, "For you, no charge!"
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
Pre-med life
- Attachments
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- da9f3f6b3c4e621f5d33cc3fb4bac1ed.jpg (10.14 KiB) Viewed 114380 times
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
You'd think that atoms bonding with other atoms would mean they're being friendly, but really they steal each other's electrons.
How ionic.
How ionic.
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
A photon checks into a hotel. The bellhop asks, "Can I help you with your luggage? It replies, "I don't have any. I'm traveling light."
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
What do you do with a sick chemist?
If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium.
If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium.
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
Two atoms are walking down the street.
Says one atom to the other, "Hey! I think I lost an electron!"
The other says, "Are you sure??"
"Yes, I'm positive!"
Says one atom to the other, "Hey! I think I lost an electron!"
The other says, "Are you sure??"
"Yes, I'm positive!"
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
Q: What does a photon say when he checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage.
A: He says, "No, I'm traveling light."
A: He says, "No, I'm traveling light."
Re: Chemistry Jokes
Q: What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?
A: CSI
A: CSI
Last edited by Helen 3C on Sun Jan 29, 2017 5:51 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
Q: What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?
A: OH SNaP!
A: OH SNaP!
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
Did you hear the rumor that Sodium was dating Chloride?
Na, I would take that rumor with a grain of salt.
Na, I would take that rumor with a grain of salt.
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
Q: What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?
A: CSI
LOLLLLLLLL CHEM IS FUNNYYYY
A: CSI
LOLLLLLLLL CHEM IS FUNNYYYY
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
A covalent bond yells at an ionic bond, "Didn't anybody ever teach you to share?"
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
So this dude's like, "Where are you going with all that element 83?"
and I was like...
None of your bismuth
and I was like...
None of your bismuth
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."
The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."
The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Re: Chemistry Jokes
A chemistry teacher is recruited as a radio operator in the first world war. He soon becomes familiar with the military habit of abbreviating everything. As his unit comes under a sustained enemy attack, he is asked to urgently inform his HQ.
"NaCl over NaOH! NaCl over NaOH!" he says.
"NaCl over NaOH?" shouts his officer. "What do you mean?"
"The base is under a salt!" The chemist replied.
"NaCl over NaOH! NaCl over NaOH!" he says.
"NaCl over NaOH?" shouts his officer. "What do you mean?"
"The base is under a salt!" The chemist replied.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Are you made of copper and tellurium?? Because you're pretty CuTe!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book on helium?
He just couldn't put it down.
He just couldn't put it down.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."
The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."
The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Not a joke but...
I wish I was DNA helicase so I could unzip your genes ;)
I wish I was DNA helicase so I could unzip your genes ;)
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Girl are you made of Copper and Tellerium? Because you sure are CuTe
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What is the scariest element on the periodic table?
Ah, the element of surprise.
Ah, the element of surprise.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
This is more of a pun but here goes,
If you're ever feeling down always remember,
if you have mass and take up space,
then you matter :)
If you're ever feeling down always remember,
if you have mass and take up space,
then you matter :)
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
A: It went OK...
A: It went OK...
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Albert Ghiorso, Glenn T. Seaborg, John R. Walton and Torbjørn Sikkeland wanted a reward for discovering element 102.
Everyone just said No.
Everyone just said No.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why are chemists so great at solving problems?
Answer: Because they have all the solutions.
Answer: Because they have all the solutions.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the Samsung engineers learn about right before making the Galaxy Note 7?
Spontaneous Combustion
Spontaneous Combustion
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite…
He said NaBrO
He said NaBrO
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A proton and a neutron walk into a bar and the neutron asks the bartender how much for a drink & he replies "For you, no charge!"
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any sodium hypobromite... he said NaBro.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Ever wonder why chemists all love working with ammonia???
Because it is all basic stuff...
Because it is all basic stuff...
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?
A: He got Avogadro's number!
A: He got Avogadro's number!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I'm apologizing ahead of time for all the bad jokes I will make because all the good ones argon..
But I think like a proton so I tend be very positive about it..
I believe when it comes to chemistry puns I'm in my element.
(ha ha ha)
^And this is cute
But I think like a proton so I tend be very positive about it..
I believe when it comes to chemistry puns I'm in my element.
(ha ha ha)
^And this is cute
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
A: HeHe
A: HeHe
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