Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Two people into a bar
one goes can I have H20
the other goes can i have H20 too
he dies...
heh
one goes can I have H20
the other goes can i have H20 too
he dies...
heh
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why does a hamburger have lower energy than steak?
Because it's in the ground state.
Because it's in the ground state.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Accurately portrays my love life
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I have many chemistry jokes. I'm just afraid they won't get a good reaction.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."
The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."
The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: How many Heisenbergs does it take to change a light bulb?
A: If you know the number, you don't know where the light bulb is.
A: If you know the number, you don't know where the light bulb is.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If the formula for water is H2O
Then is the formula for an ice cube H2O Squared?
Then is the formula for an ice cube H2O Squared?
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What's the difference between chemistry and a hot girl?
I have a hot girl in my chemistry class but don't have chemistry with one.
#original
P.S. Ladies, this is just a joke, if I have chemistry with you, you are beautiful
I have a hot girl in my chemistry class but don't have chemistry with one.
#original
P.S. Ladies, this is just a joke, if I have chemistry with you, you are beautiful
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I have many chemistry jokes... I'm just afraid they won't get a good reaction.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why does a burger patty have lower energy than steak?
A: Because it's in the ground state!
A: Because it's in the ground state!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
me, drinking water: this water is so iconic
I would tell another chemistry joke, but all of my good ones argon
I would tell another chemistry joke, but all of my good ones argon
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why did the chemists lose an electron?
They weren't keeping an ion them!
They weren't keeping an ion them!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why does a hamburger have lower energy than a steak?
A: Because it's in the ground state.
A: Because it's in the ground state.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Cation
Cat-i-on
noun, Chemistry
1. An ion with a paws-itive charge.
2. A very cute ion.
Cat-i-on
noun, Chemistry
1. An ion with a paws-itive charge.
2. A very cute ion.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A small furry mammal walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says, "Sorry, our maximum occupancy is only 6.00 x 10^23. We can't serve a mole."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?
A: Because it's in the ground state.
A: Because it's in the ground state.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What do you get when you cut an avocado into 6.02214x1023 pieces?
Guacamole! :)
Guacamole! :)
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
When the cops pull you over, just do what Heisenberg does. When they ask you, tell them you don't how fast you were going, just where you were.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do scientists like working with Ammonia?
Because it's pretty basic stuff.
Because it's pretty basic stuff.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
He just couldn't put it down.
He just couldn't put it down.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
As the two polar bonds stared into each other's eyes, they soon began to share a moment. A dipole moment.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
He just couldn't put it down.
Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.
He just couldn't put it down.
Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Sixteen sodiums walk into a room. Who's next?
NA-NA-NA-NA
NA-NA-NA-NA
NA-NA-NA-NA
NA-NA-NA-NA
BATMAAAN!
NA-NA-NA-NA
NA-NA-NA-NA
NA-NA-NA-NA
NA-NA-NA-NA
BATMAAAN!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you guys hear about the ligand who became a magician? He made his own TV show called "The Carbonato Effect".
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Now that our midterm is over...
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they’d be alloys.
Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?
He got Avogadro's number!
Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?
He got Avogadro's number!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A photon walks into a hotel. The desk clerk says, "Welcome to our hotel. Can we help you with your luggage?" The photon says, "No thanks, I'm traveling light."
Happy Friday!
Happy Friday!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Here are some chemistry pick up lines so you are prepared just in case an attractive person sits next to you during the chemistry lecture.
Do you have 11 protons? Cause you're sodium fine.
Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you're cute.
You must be a compound of beryllium and barium...because you're a total BaBe.
Do you have 11 protons? Cause you're sodium fine.
Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you're cute.
You must be a compound of beryllium and barium...because you're a total BaBe.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
A: It went OK.
A: It went OK.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
An electron walks into the bar and asks, "how much for a drink?" and the bartender says, "for you no charge!"
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why did the Chem student miss a quiz question about positively charged atoms?
A: His tutor had poor communication.
A: His tutor had poor communication.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Most people find chemistry jokes funny.
I find them prephosphorous.
I find them prephosphorous.
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Chem Joke
Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A. First you try to helium, then you try to curium, but if this fails then you have to barium.
A. First you try to helium, then you try to curium, but if this fails then you have to barium.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Someone gave me an extra electron, and I complained.
My friend told me to stop being so negative.
My friend told me to stop being so negative.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What did the chemist say when he found two new isotopes of Helium?
A: HeHe
A: HeHe
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Me: What do you call a situation with one love interest and four suitors? ... A love tetrahedral! XD
My friend: I zinc you need to stop. -.-
My friend: I zinc you need to stop. -.-
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q:Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
A:They're cheaper than day rates.
Q: What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?
A: CSI
A:They're cheaper than day rates.
Q: What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?
A: CSI
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What is a Chemist's favorite type of tree?
A: A stoichiome-tree
Q: What do you get when you cut an avocado into 6.022x10^23 pieces?
A: Guacamole
A: A stoichiome-tree
Q: What do you get when you cut an avocado into 6.022x10^23 pieces?
A: Guacamole
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why did the chemist get thrown in prison?
He got charged with a-salt-and-battery!!!
He got charged with a-salt-and-battery!!!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the orbital think of the chemistry homework?
He thought it was easy pz!
He thought it was easy pz!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If you aren't part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
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