Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

[Harmeet_Kaur_2D]

Midterm season is coming and it can be pretty stressful.

So make sure you all think like a proton and stay positive!!!

[Krista Yang 1C]

Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.

[Ryan Petrecca 1L]

Lol

[alvarado_natalie_2H]

[Rhiannon Imbeah 2I]

"Don't trust atoms, they make up everything." ;)

[Ian Brown 1K]

What is the dullest element?
Bohrium

[Jaz_Y_1H]

-Bumper sticker about the 2nd Law of thermodynamics:
S happens

-"Absolutely," Kelvin said temperately, as he zeroed in on the
answer.

[Samantha Rubin-Pope - 1H]

chemistry joke #1

[ibukunolabinjo_3J]

In the late 1940s, German theoretical physicist Arnold Sommerfeld, having previously written a series of books in physics: mechanics (1943), electrodynamics (1948), optics (1950), etc., was asked why he had never written a book on thermodynamics?

“Thermodynamics is a funny subject. The first time you go through it, you don't understand it at all. The second time you go through it, you think you understand it, except for one or two small points. The third time you go through it, you know you don't understand it, but by that time you are so used to it, it doesn't bother you anymore.”

[swatiperepa]

This cat is my hero

[JessenyaReyes_1B]

Does anyone know any jokes about sodium? Na. Yeah, I know that was sodium funny!

[Tiffany Wee 2D]

Food jokes are the best

[Sahil Sharma 2J]

Anyone know any jokes about Sodium?

Na.

[Timothy Yu 2M]

Why is the vacuum cleaner so hot?

Because Thermo-chemistry sucks =(

[Jagmeet_Arora_1G]

[Rodri_Karla_1J]

My parents ask me why I don't clean my room.

I tell them, "In an isolated system, entropy can only increase."

[z_hernandez_loza_3J]

.

[Cris-1C]

Why do chemists call Helium, Curium and Barium the healing elements?

-Because if you can't Helium or Curium, you Barium!

[John Ly 2I]

I wish everyone best of luck on this week's quiz! :D

[AlexSun2L]

Q: What do dipoles say in passing?
A: "Have you got a moment?"

[Sunny Chera 1N]

[ERIKTORRESDisc3C]

So, this scientist walks into a sports bar and orders his food and beer when another waiter approaches his a while later.
The waiter greets him, "Welcome to the Entropy Bar - may I take your order?"
"I put in disorder a long time ago. The service here is getting worse all the time," replied the scientist.
"My experience Gibbs me reason to believe you," responded the waiter.
The scientist continued, "It's not just that, I know this waitress. Her name's Ellen Omega. She really made me thermally dynamic. So, I asked her out. I tell you, when she don't like you, she really Boltz, man. Women like that are never distributed normally among the population."
What kind of Poisson would say something like this? (;

[Michael Sparks 2F]

Don't trust atoms, they make up everything.

[Andrew M 2J]

Someone threw Sodium Chloride at me.
I charged them for A Salt

[Chris Yeh 3D]

Q: What Kind of Fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?
A: 2 Na

[KylaTenido1G]

[ryan_chowdhury_2E]

Girl you wanna go out?
Because we have resonance ;)

[Samya Konda 2I]

Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?
It went OK2!

[Samya Konda 2I]

Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?
It went OK2!

[Celine_Ngo_3L]

954cb361299dbf962caaba2829ce6bd1.jpg (10.42 KiB) Viewed 22154 times

[a_jeny2E]

Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 degrees Celsius and still be 0K.

[ckim_1I]

Everyone during Finals be prepared like

[Chaoyi_He_3H]

What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?
OH SNaP!

[Jonathan_Hu_2C]

[img]

[Jeana Wei 3C]

[Noelle Min-1N]

Q: What is the chemical formula for "banana"?
A: BaNa2

[Josh_Zhong_1F]

How about the chemical workers — are they unionized?

[AlexandraOsterland_3E]

If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.

[Ashley T 2H]

”I zinc we are done because all the other jokes ar-gon!”

[ben maryamian]

What do you do with a dead chemist?
Barium

[Gigi Ye 2K]

Take all your lame chemistry jokes and Barium.

[yubin moon 3c]

what is a cation afraid of?

a dogion!

[Jasmine_Wong_2K]

What do you do with a sick chemist?
Well, if you can't Helium, and you can't Curium, then you're going to have to Barium.

[Alex Phu 2c]

If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.

[Hanan_Kashkoul_1O]

"Q: Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero?
A: He's 0K now."

[Theresa_Trieu_2G]

[Ivanna_Tang_3B]

]
baby thermodynamics!

[Franklin Kong 3D]

Why was the mole of oxygen so happy when she left the bar?
Because she got Avogadro's number.

[Helena Vervaet 1N]

Two chemists go into a bar. The first one says, "I think I'll have an H2O." The second one says, "I think I'll have an H2O too," and he died shortly afterwards.

[Helena Vervaet 1N]

A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light!"

[Joshua Song 2M]

That feeling when a chemist is messing with you:

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[img]https://encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS17grz-Ag4DLwtaeh2Eky3p9quzhgQL1u6rjgQGWJUqTkTCLxA/img]

[maria_tamondong_1L]

If Fe is Iron... then, FeMale is "IRON MAN"
LOL

[Jane Sin 3A]

Q: What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?
A: CoFe2

Q: What do you call a clown who's in jail?
A: A silicon

[Mimi_Giang_1F]

I would make a joke about free energy, but no one Gibbs a darn :(

[Frankie Escobedo 3E]

[Melody Li 2L]

[Sharlene Reyes 2N]

[Samart_Condon_1D]

Don't trust atoms... They make up everything.

[Kristina98]

A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you," The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through. :) hopefully providing some laughs during these stressful weeks of midterms. Good luck everyone!

[Chris Liddicoat]

Them: "Tell me a potassium joke!"
Me "K!"

[Caresse_Zhong_2K]

Q: What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A: A ferrous wheel.

[PriscillaMariscal_3F]

I hate it when people text me 'K,' when I'm not in the mood to talk about Potassium.

[804748473]

Take all your lame chemistry jokes and barium

[GevickSafarians_14B]

This was a really funny joke.

[Sonia_Lele_2K]

Q: How did the chemist survive the famine?

A: By subsisting on titrations.

[304779711]

What kind of dogs do chemists have?
...........................
Laboratory retrievers!

[hafsa_zulfiqar_1j]

A group of organic molecules were having a party, when a group of robbers broke into the room and stole all of the guest's joules. A tall, strong man, armed with a machine gun came into the room and killed the robbers one by one. The guests were very grateful to this man, and they wanted to know who he was. He replied: My name is BOND, Covalent Bond.

[Jennifer_Yee_3I]

That was sodium funny. I slapped my neon that one!!

[Jason_Hong_2J]

Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.

[Kendall_Islam_3A]

The 4 hydrogen atoms joined forces with carbon to save the day. I guess you could say they were covaliant.

[heather_carlton_1K]

Q: Is silicon spelled the same way in Spanish?
A: Si!

[Kiana_Shibata_2G]

Q: What do you get when you complete a chemistry class?

A: A graduated cylinder.

[Tiffany Jeng 1L]

What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? A one molar solution.

[Mackenzie_Lowenstein_2N]

Two men walk into a restaurant. The first says, "I'll order H2O". The second says, "I'll order H2O too". The second man dies.

[Kelly Ortega 1K]

-What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?
CoFe2

[Angela To 2B]

Q: What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A: A ferrous wheel.

[Jessica_Chang_1G]

Polar Bear Joke :P

[sheilaho_1E]

Q: Why did the noble gas cry?
A: Because all his friends Argon

[Omer Lavian 2K]

How does the crystal with no entropy feel?

0 K

[Katelynn Luansing 2B]

Why did the bear dissolve in water?

He was a POLAR bear.

[Katelynn Luansing 2B]

What was NaCl charged with?

A SALT.

[Mirian_Garcia_2G]

[Korosh Bahrami]

Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?

[Eli Pazol 2F]

*mind explodes*

[004599434]

What do you get when you mix sulfur, tungsten, and silver?

SWAG

[Iris Feng 2I]

What is a cation afraid of?

A dogion.

[Irene Ramos 1F]

Second Law of Thermo-Joke!

[YsabelCheang1H]

[Janet Pham 1B]

Q: If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
A: H2O cubed

[Tyler_Vellozzi_3E]

"K."
Well potassium to you too.

[gracehart]



[GregoryPolyakov_1H]

Did you know you could cool yourself to around -273'C

You'd probably still be 0K

[Hector_Gutierrez 1J]

Q. Why did the chemistry student fall asleep during?
A. Because it was boron.

[Hector_Gutierrez 1J]

I should probably study for my quiz . . . or NaW

[AllanNicholson2F]

I would make a free energy joke but nobody Gibbs a darn

[Brandon_Williams_3E]

Getting ready for organic chemistry

[Banik_Housepian_2K]

What kind of fish is made up of 2 sodium atoms?
TuNa

[Michael_Zhang_1J]

Q: What's another name of CH2O?
A: Sea-water!

[Evan Gentry 2E]

A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."

[Jessica_Zeng_3G]

Why do chemists love nitrates so much? They're cheaper than day rates!