Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
He just couldn't put it down. :)
He just couldn't put it down. :)
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I wish your name was Avogadro..... because then I'd already have your number...... 6.02 x 10^23
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
According to a chemist, why is the world so diverse? Because it's made up of alkynes of people.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
When I heard that Oxygen and Magnesium were dating I was like O Mg!!!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
The best thing about learning about equilibrium... is that nothing changes!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
H2O cubed
H2O cubed
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What do you do with a sick chemist?
Answer: You try to Helium, you try to Curium, but if all else fails you have to Barium
Answer: You try to Helium, you try to Curium, but if all else fails you have to Barium
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why did the bear dissolve in water?
A: Because he was a polar bear!
A: Because he was a polar bear!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
johnny was a chemist
johnny is no more
what johnny thought was h2o was h2so4
johnny is no more
what johnny thought was h2o was h2so4
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A bear from the U.S. named Joe invites his cousin from Antarctica, Jeff, to go swimming.
They both jump in the pool, but Jeff starts freaking because he thinks he's dissolving.
Joe tells Jeff, "calm down bears are insoluble you're fine"
and Jeff replies, "easy for you to say, you're not polar!"
They both jump in the pool, but Jeff starts freaking because he thinks he's dissolving.
Joe tells Jeff, "calm down bears are insoluble you're fine"
and Jeff replies, "easy for you to say, you're not polar!"
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he left the singles bar?
A: He got Avogadro's number!
A: He got Avogadro's number!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
When you accept that you won't know for sure if you solved an entropy problem correctly:
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
In a sports relay race, a chemical kinetics specialist runs slowly, and his group loses the race.
When the chemical kinetics specialist is asked why he ran slowly, his reply was “I always wanted to be the significant rate determining step”.
When the chemical kinetics specialist is asked why he ran slowly, his reply was “I always wanted to be the significant rate determining step”.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I wanted to tell you a joke about the elements but all the good ones Argon
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
" Bro 1: Hey do you want to hear a joke about Sodium Hypobromite?
Bro 1: NaBrO
Bro 2: I slapped my neon that one! "
Bro 1: NaBrO
Bro 2: I slapped my neon that one! "
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you hear about the man who was cooled to -273.15˚C? He was 0K.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A man was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car.
He was booked for a salt and battery.
He was booked for a salt and battery.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
"Sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium,
sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium."
-Blink 182, All the Small Things
sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium, sodium."
-Blink 182, All the Small Things
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?
Because it's pretty basic stuff.
Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: If a mole of moles were digging a mole of holes, what would you see?
A: A mole of molasses.
A: A mole of molasses.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
The optimist sees the glass half full. The pessimist sees the glass half empty. The chemist sees the glass completely full, half with liquid and half with air.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Two atoms walk down the street. One turns to the other, "I think I just lost an eletron." The other asks, "Are you sure?" The first atom said, "Sure! I'm positive !"
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder?
A: You may have graduated but I've got many degrees.
A: You may have graduated but I've got many degrees.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemist learn about ammonia first?
BECAUSE ITS PRETTY BASIC STUFF
BECAUSE ITS PRETTY BASIC STUFF
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
You shouldn't drink water when studying because adding water to your system decreases concentration!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
When you graduate with a degree but life just doesn't work out sometimes
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?
A: Because it's in the ground state.
A: Because it's in the ground state.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
In a sports relay race, a chemical kinetics specialist runs slowly, and his group loses the race.
When the chemical kinetics specialist is asked why he ran slowly, his reply was “I always wanted to be the significant rate determining step”
When the chemical kinetics specialist is asked why he ran slowly, his reply was “I always wanted to be the significant rate determining step”
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?
A: HeHe
A: HeHe
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
That midterm tho
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What do physicists enjoy doing most at sporting events?
A: The wave.
A: The wave.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Everyone: "Wow that midterm was really chaotic! It was all over the place!!!"
Dr. Lavelle: "You could say it's entropy was pretty high huh ;)"
Dr. Lavelle: "You could say it's entropy was pretty high huh ;)"
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I have many chemistry jokes.
....
I'm just afraid they won't get a good Reaction.
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I'm just afraid they won't get a good Reaction.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Chemists are bad at telling jokes.... They lack the element of surprise.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."
Helium doesn't react.
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."
Helium doesn't react.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero?
He's 0K now.
He's 0K now.
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