Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

[Janet Pham 1B]

What is activation energy?

The useful quantity of energy available in one cup of coffee

[gracehart]

[Balint Nagy 3C]

What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?
OH SNaP!

[Kiana_Shibata_2G]

I would tell another chemistry joke, but all of the good ones Argon...

[Gus_Guinto_2F]

[AllanNicholson2F]

If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.

[Diana_Anum1G]

[Lily_Dermendjian_2B]

http://www.chemistryjokes.com/images/my ... -at-me.jpg

[Tina_Keshishian_2F]

Why did the bear dissolve in water?
-it was a polar bear

[Hannah Liu 2A]

You must be full of beryllium, gold, and titanium because you are BeAuTi-FULL!

[melissapasao1B]

you must be made out of uranium and iodine

because all I see is
U and I

[Simran Brar 1J]

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[AngelaWang_1F]

How about those chemical workers...are they unionized?

[Alex Phu 2c]

[Park_DoHy_2F]

Bohred? Try Wave function..

[Helena Vervaet 1N]

What we reviewed in class today:

[Vanessa_Nguyen_1I]

A mother bought her teenage son a chemistry set, but he threw it on the floor.
If he thinks he’s going to get a reaction that way, he has got a lot to learn.

[Anika_Desar_3N]

HAHA

[Krishil_Gandhi_1D]

Ochem Joke

[Matt_Coopersmith_4H]

I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite…

He said NaBrO!

[Zara_Joshi_3L]

.

[Ashley Shirriff 2F]

.

[KimberlySalinas_2A]

According to a chemist, why is the world so diverse?
Because it's made up of Alkynes of people

[Eli Pazol 2F]

everyone on this page

[504829531]

[Katherine Sung 2I]

What did one ion say to another ion?

I've got my ion you!

[Julia_Gordon_2A]

Two chemists go into a bar. The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O." The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" — and he died.

[Kelly Tran 3N]

Q: Why do chemistry professors like to teach about ammonia?
A: Because it's basically material!

[Kendall_Chaffin_3C]

What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond

[Christian Hardoy 3F]

Yo mama so ugly not even fluorine would bond with her!

[Christian Hardoy 3F]

Q: What did the cowboy chemist say to his horse?
A: HIO Ag!

[Helen_Lee_1L]

Why can't ammonia get any girlfriends?

Because he's so basic.

[arsalzaheer2L]

A Chemistry lab is like a party...

Some drop acid.. while others drop the base.

Happy Friday (:

(not original content)

[Grace 3G]

[Sharlene Reyes 2N]

[trase aguigam 2A]

What in hybridization

[Nathan Mallipeddi 2H]

How did the chemist survive the famine?
By subsisting on titrations.

[ChiragThadaniDis2M]

OMg
Did you hear that oxygen and magnesium are a couple?

[Kendall_Islam_3A]

Ethel Alcohol married Fatty Acid. They had a daughter and called her Ester.

[Quynh Nguyen 2H]

Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you can't helium and you can't curium, then you may as well barium.

Q: Why did the noble gas cry?
A: Because all his friends Argon

[Jennifer Ngo 1M]

[William_Lee_Dis_3H]

Do you have 11 protons?
Cause you sodium fine

[Katherine_Ly_1H]

Have you heard about the chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.

[Vandan_Patel_3L]

What's wrong with a joke involving Cobalt, Radon, and Ytterium?
its CoRnY

[Mimi_Giang_1F]

Organic chemistry is difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.

[Bola_G_3H]

A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you," The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."

[Luigivar 2F]

[Tom Notcovich 3B]

A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."

[Tom Notcovich 3B]

q: Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero?
a: He's 0K now

[Tom Notcovich 3B]

Anybody know any good jokes about sodium??
Na

[Christian_Makar_2D]

Yay for complicated Lewis Structures

[Alexander Chen 3N]

[Kirsten Bermudo 1O]

Are you a carbon sample? Because I want to date you.

[Shailyn_Moore_3C]

How Did The Chemist Survive The Famine?
By subsisting on titrations

[Ashley_Lok_3M]

[Justin_Bueno_2O]

Short Joke

[rachel_john]

Q: What did one titration say to the other?
A: "Let's meet at the endpoint"

[Annie_Amundson_1L]

Q: What is the definition of a cation?

A: A positively charged cat!

[Mikaela Gareeb 3G]

What do you call iron blowing in the wind?
Febreze

What do dipoles say in passing"
"Have you got a moment?"

[Trisha Agarwal 1O]

[Amanda_Quintero_1K]

Q: What two elements do sheep belt when happy?

A: BaH

[Belicia Tang 1B]

Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?

[SydneyKusumoputro_3K]

A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."
The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."

[Srishti_Dhawan_2I]

Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?
It went OK2!

[harseerat_jajj_3G]

good one

[Jonathan Marin Dis3A]

A sign outside the chemistry hotel reads "Great Day Rates, Even Better NO3-'s"

[Calvin Huang 3D]

What did the cowboy say to the chemist?

What in titration!!

[Samantha_Leong_3K]

[Cerjay_Lugtu_3B]

I saw someone run away with my gold....

So i shouted, "Hey! AU!"

[Toby Lin 1J]

[Cobie_Allen_1H]

Enjoy!

[isabella_orteza_1I]

gone fission

[Arielle 1I]

[Madison Juul 1D]

I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite…
He said NaBrO

[Rory_Grant_3E]

My prediction for the next quiz.

[ChristinaN1L]

[Ashley Curtis 2O]

[Kristine_Espinosa_2L]

Q: Anyone know any jokes about sodium?
A: Na

[Jeffrey_Huang_2K]

[Matthew Yeganeh 3M]

I can never understand organic chemistry
It has alkynes of problems

[rielapopp3O]

Why does a hamburger yield lower energy than a steak? Because it's in the ground state...

[Ricardo Munoz 3K]

Any fans of Yu Gi Oh?

[Meera McAdam 1C]

What's a good way to study for chem tests? Chemistream Lavelle's lectures. (and do hw problems.)

[Taylor_Yamane_2L]

[Chiemeka Ezechukwu 3K]

Why can you never trust atoms?


A: They make up everything!

[Jessica_Zeng_3G]

What happens to nitrogen when there's sunlight?

It becomes daytrogen!

[Natalie_Boyd_1C]

[Joshua Song 2M]

What do you call a man who stares creepily at Jacob's ladder?

An electrophile.

[Alice Gonzalez 2F]

What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

"OH SNaP"

[Samart_Condon_1D]

What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
.
.
.
A ferrous wheel

[Lindsey Lill]

What is a chemist's favorite kind of tree?

A Chemistree

[caitlin_oberman_2G]

A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."

[Brandon_Williams_3E]

These jokes are getting bad

[Chem_Mod]

[Paola_RubioRod_1F]

Are you a carbon sample?
Because I want to date you.

[Breanna Buhay 2H]

Do you have 11 protons?
Cause you sodium fine

[Daniel Dobrin 2F]

Two chemists go into a bar. The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O." The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" - and he died.

[Desiree Martin 2A]

Chemistry Joke :)

[FaithPigeon_1E]

Are you an activation energy?

Because you are a barrier in my life.

[Annie Tagvoryan 3A]

Since we're about to start O-chem