Post All Chemistry Jokes Here

[Marissa Stinnett 1E]

[Kimberly_Hoh_2A]

You R-O-R get organic chemistry, or you don't.

[Geovanni_Suarez_3A]

[melissapasao1B]

What do you do with a sick chemist?





If you can't helium, and you can't curium, then you might as well barium.

[April Z 1K]

Q: What did the Electrophile say to Benzene?
A: I want some of that sweet pi.

[Jaz_Y_1H]

This is a little dramatic but I can see it!

[AlexSun2L]

The Official Unabashed Scientific Dictionary defines cation as a positively charged kitten.

[DhirajR_3F]

Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.

I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite…
He said NaBrO

Q: What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?
A: CSI

Q: What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?
A: CoFe2

[Ryan Petrecca 1L]

xD

[004599434]

Did you here oxygen went on a date with potassium?
It went OK.

[Samya Konda 2I]

What is carbon dating? Two diamonds on a night out.

Why did the noble gas cry? Because all his friends argon.

[JoAnna Yortiss 2G]

[Mihika Sridhar 3H]

This chemistry quiz is going to be alkynes of trouble.

[Matthew Yeganeh 3M]

[Lexy Swenson 1F]

Organic chemistry is difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.

Teacher: What is the formula for water?
Student: H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O
Teacher: That's not what I taught you.
Student: But you said the formula for water was...H to O.

[PriscillaMariscal_3F]

mood before chem quiz

[maria_tamondong_1L]

what did the polar bear dissolved in water?
Polar Bear!

[ryan_chowdhury_2E]

Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?

[Chin_Alyssa_3I]

[Sarah Sackey_3G]

lol

[Brian_Mena_1J]

Cover your basics

[Billy Ngoy 2I]

Q: What do you call a joke that is based on cobalt, radon, and yttrium?

A: CoRnY.

[Billy Ngoy 2I]

Q: Hydroxyl, Sulfur, Sodium, and Phosphorus walk into a bar. What did the bartender say?

A: "OH SNaP!!!"

[Frank_Smith_3L]

i
love Chem!

[Adrienne Johnson 1D]

What do you call a joke that is based on cobalt, radon, and yttrium?

CoRnY

[Adrienne Johnson 1D]

Have you heard the one about the chemist who was reading a book about Helium?

He just couldn't put it down

[anatorres1B]

pusheen cat

[gohar_mkrtchyan_2J]

[Precious_Li_1D]

A corny one

[Avery_E]

hehehe

[julia lai 3A]

Q: Where does the German chemistry teacher put the used batteries of an electrolytic experiment?
A: In the zinc.

[MaddyMoore3A]

Anyone here yet???

[Grace Pu 3E]

Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.

[Jagmeet_Arora_1G]

Q: Why did Chlorine's sisters Boron and Carbon lock her in the closet?
A: Because she was too attractive!

[Jane Sin 3A]

Q: What do you call a periodic table with gold missing?
A: "Au revoir"

[Kirsten Bermudo 1O]

Q: What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder?
A: At least I have a degree.

[Mikaela Gareeb 3G]

Did you hear about the guy who got cooled to absolute zero ?
He's 0K now

What's a girl's future best friend?
Carbon
C (graphite) -> C (diamond)

[wesley hardin]

What car did the Chemistry Professor buy?
A Mercedes Benzene.
:)

[ChiragThadaniDis2M]

A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much for a drink, bartender says, "for you, no charge!"

[Lily_Dermendjian_2B]

periodic-table-150x150.jpg (8.48 KiB) Viewed 17838 times

[Ashley Curtis 2O]

[Rhea Kundan_2G]

honestly I laughed

[Aleena_Sorf_2A]

Why are chemists great for solving problems?
- They have all the solutions.

[Vandan_Patel_3L]

Why did the electron want to go to the party?

Because it was excited

[alliedavis]

[Rodri_Karla_1J]

[Mindy Zhang 3F]

Q. How do you tell the difference between a chemist and a train driver?
A. Ask them to pronounce “unionized”!

[Madison Juul 1D]

Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?

[Jason Duong 1D]

Organic chemistry is difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.

[Joshua Beristain 2J]

What is a snake's favorite law?
Hesssss's Law!

[RitaChang_2C]

Did you hear about the man who got cooled to absolute zero?

He's 0K now.

[Calvin Huang 3D]

What is Avogadro's favorite type of fruit?

Watermolens.

[Noor_Chahal_3G]

Q: If H20 is water, what is H204?
A: Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.

[Diana_Visco_1l]

Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon...

[Noor_Chahal_3G]

What do you call iron blowing in the wind?

Fe-breeze

[Chaoyi_He_3H]

[Chris Yeh 3D]

[Noor_Chahal_3G]

Q: Why did the acid go to the gym?
A: To become a buffer solution.

[KarinaOropeza_2L]

[Serena Patel 2H]

What did the chemists say after they heard a funny joke?

"That joke was sodium funny. I slapped my neon on that one."

[Ian Brown 1K]

What was Avogadro's favorite sport?

Golf because he always got a mole-in-one.

[Helen 3C]

[HarshiniMuthukumar3N]

Why does hamburger have less energy than steak?
It's in the ground state.

[Noor_Chahal_3G]

A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, "No, I'm traveling light."

[Noor_Chahal_3G]

What was NaCl charged with when he was arrested?
A salt

[Zhiyong Xie 3K]

[Ashley Shirriff 2F]

.

[swatiperepa]

:)

[Marisa_Woo_2G]

What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

A one molar solution :)

[Sally_Tu_1H]

What do you do with a sick chemist?
If you can’t helium and you can’t curium, you might as well barium.

[Alexandra_Ivanova_1A]

[Novelpreet_Boparai1N]

My teacher threw Sodium Chloride at me. That's a salt!

[Rachel_Bressler_3I]

[Josh Ku 3H]

How did the hipster chemist burn his hand?

He picked up his beaker before it was cool.

[Ethan_Wilson_1E]

I tell bad chemistry jokes periodically

[Breanna Buhay 2H]

If you have mass and take up space, then you matter <3

[Yen Vuong 2I]

[Yen Vuong 2I]

[Alicia_Kwan_2H]

Hey I just met you
And this is crazy
But here's my number
6.0221x10^23
So call me maybe!

[Harmeet_Kaur_2D]

Q: What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

A: He was booked for a salt and battery.

[Suk Jin Song 3L]

[z_hernandez_loza_3J]

.

[FaithPigeon_1E]

Chem is so fluorine uranium nitrogen!!

[z_hernandez_loza_3J]

Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?

[Luigivar 2F]

Q: Why are chemists so good at solving problems?
A: Because the have and make all the solutions!

[Mirian_Garcia_2G]

[Hannah_El-Sabrout_2K]

Criminal Elements:

Cu: I'm taking the two of you in for a salt!

Na and Cl: You'll never catch us alive, copper!

[Taravat_Lakzian_1C]

Which biochemicals wash up on beaches?
-Nucleotides

[Anisha Patel 1G]

:D

[Mirian_Garcia_2G]

When you can't find good chemistry jokes... This will have to do

[Terry1A]

You must be made of Uranium and Iodine because all I can see is U and I!

[Trisha Kurup 2A]

What do you do with a dead chemists? Barium

[lilyjustine_1G]

Why do chemists call Helium, Curium, and Barium the medical elements?

Because, if you can't helium or curium, you barium

I LOLed so hard at this :)

[Kimberly_Rivera_3K]

[Anthony_Sampayo_4I]

Two atoms are walking down the street.
One says to the other, "Hey I think I lost an electron!"
The other says, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm positive!"

[Meera McAdam 1C]

What's the only thing worse than organic chemistry? GMO chemistry.

[lilyjustine_1G]

tbh lavelle said it first

[Timothy Yu 2M]

My TA threw Sodium chloride at me! That's a salt! >=(

[sboutros2B]

What Do You Call a Fish Made of Two Sodium Atoms?
2Na

[Faizal_Mamani_1F]

Our Bond is So strong, not even a nucleophile can break it!