Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A photon checks into a hotel. The manager at the front desks asks if he will be needing any help with luggage. The photon replies "no thank you I'm traveling light."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A ferrous wheel.
A ferrous wheel.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What do you do with a sick chemist?
if you can't helium and you can't curium, then you might as well barium
if you can't helium and you can't curium, then you might as well barium
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?
A: It went OK.
A: It went OK.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A chemistry lab is just like a party. Some drop acid, others drop the base.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Aren't you all glad we have this chemistry community forum? It makes 14A less of a cheMYSTERY for us all :)
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?
A: A ferrous wheel.
A: A ferrous wheel.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I want to tell another chemistry joke but all the good ones arsenic.
Did I funny right?
Did I funny right?
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorus walking into the bar? OH SNaP!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you know that you can cool yourself down to -273.15 degrees Celsius and still be 0K?
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
why do chemists like nitrates so much?
they're cheaper than dayrates.
they're cheaper than dayrates.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Two chemists go into a bar. The first one Jim says "I think I'll have an H2O." The second one Bob says "I think I'll have an H2O too"... and then Bob died.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I heard that Oxygen and Magnesium were going out and I was like O Mg.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Chemists are just one lab accident away from being a super villain.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Polar bear: Help! Help! I'm dissolving!
Brown bear: But bears are insoluble...
Polar bear: That's easy for you to say...You're not polar!
Brown bear: But bears are insoluble...
Polar bear: That's easy for you to say...You're not polar!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: If H20 is water, what is H204?
A: Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
A: Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
In Arctic, a bear drop into the lake and looking for help:
"HELP, i'm dissolving"
Another brown bear get there and explains:
"dude, bears are insoluble"
....
"That's easy for you to say, you are not polar....."
"HELP, i'm dissolving"
Another brown bear get there and explains:
"dude, bears are insoluble"
....
"That's easy for you to say, you are not polar....."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
One day on the Tonight Show, Jay Leno showed a classified add that read: "Do you have mole problems? If so, call Avogadro at 602-1023."
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What is the name of the molecule bunny-O-bunny?
A: An ether bunny
A: An ether bunny
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
A: They're cheaper than day rates.
A: They're cheaper than day rates.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why do chemists call helium, curium and barium the medical elements?
A: Because if you can't helium or curium, you barium!
A: Because if you can't helium or curium, you barium!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?
A: Because it's in the ground state.
A: Because it's in the ground state.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
I told a joke to a guy named Helium to get him to share his electrons but he didn't react.
He He He
He He He
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What's Uranium's favorite genre of music?
Death metal. (They love listening to it on the radio)
Death metal. (They love listening to it on the radio)
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?
He just couldn't put it down.
He just couldn't put it down.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
My Chemistry Professor throw sodium chloride at me...
that's a salt!
that's a salt!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Roses are red,
Bromothymol is blue.
There is no endpoint,
To my love for you.
Bromothymol is blue.
There is no endpoint,
To my love for you.
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorus walking into the bar? OH SNaP!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Did you know protons have a mass?
A: I didn't even know they were catholic!
A: I didn't even know they were catholic!
Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: Why did the white bear dissolve in water?
A: Because it was polar!
A: Because it was polar!
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15˚C and still be 0k?
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia? Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Joke: Chemist 1: Did you know they discovered a new element?
Chemist 2: No, what's it called?
Chemist 1: It's symbol is Ah.
Chemist 2: Oh... The element of surprise.
Chemist 2: No, what's it called?
Chemist 1: It's symbol is Ah.
Chemist 2: Oh... The element of surprise.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Q: What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
A: One molar solution
A: One molar solution
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Why do chemists like nitrates so much?
They're cheaper than day rates.
They're cheaper than day rates.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
How does a photon avoid paying United economy bag fees?
It always is traveling light.
It always is traveling light.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. When the neutron asks how much the drink was, the bartender replies "For you, no charge".
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
When cops pull you over, just do what Heisenberg does. When they ask, tell them you don't know how fast you were going, just where you were
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
Well, do you want to hear about a sodium joke?
Na.
How about a joke about sodium Hypobromite?
NaBro.
Na.
How about a joke about sodium Hypobromite?
NaBro.
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Re: Post All Chemistry Jokes Here
A chemist blew up an experiment, looked at his students, and said, "Well, Oxidants happen!"
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